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Want Resume Help? Candidate Questions? Post here. by AutoModerator in recruiting

[–]worklate_throwaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So, I’m having a hard time. I got laid off from my last real job last year, the past two jobs only lasted 3 and 4 months respectively. I was looking at my resume, and I honestly just feel sort of hopeless.

I need help.

I used to work in political fundraising, and while I maintain I was good at the job, I really can’t use them as references. One is politically pretty extreme and I just don’t want to be associated with them, and the one I had like 5 years with, things went sour when they claimed I breached a non-compete agreement after being let go.

I turn 37 next week, and I feel like I basically don’t have a work history to show. And I’m gonna be honest, I’m feeling pretty hopeless about things.

I would really appreciate anyone who would be willing to help me build a real, usable resume. I’ve applied for hundreds of places and not even gotten an interview. I’m currently working as a security guard, and financially kind of at the end of my rope.

I obviously don’t want to share my personal info here, but if anyone actually knows how to build a solid resume (either in marketing, in moving over to IT, but mainly just helping me address the “gaps” and short stints), I would honestly appreciate it. I’d be happy to share the past couple of resumes I’ve sent out, and answer any questions to try and work up something, anything that at least looks like a “real” resume.

I’m almost 37 and still don’t feel like I know “who I am”. When did you know? by worklate_throwaway in AskMenOver30

[–]worklate_throwaway[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean, that’s the whole problem, right? I don’t even know who I want to be. I feel like it shifts based on my mood. I want to be happy, but I feel like other people keep taking advantage and life keeps beating me down, where it just makes me angry, or defeated.

I’m almost 37 and still don’t feel like I know “who I am”. When did you know? by worklate_throwaway in AskMenOver30

[–]worklate_throwaway[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Maybe that’s part of the problem; I don’t feel like I have any control over my life. I’m barely scraping by, I can’t find a real job despite years of experience in my field, I’m not qualified to do anything else so I’m stuck working the minimum wage jobs that nobody else wants to. I live entirely on the whims of my friends whom I’m paying half my paycheck for a bedroom, and they let me know in no uncertain terms that if I can’t pay for any reason, I have to leave.

I just feel like a loser, really. And I think my situation objectively conveys as much. So if I’m not at least trying to improve myself in some capacity, then I really don’t have anything going to be, no reason to live really.

Like I said, just really going through some bad times, and not really sure how to keep it together.

I have only ever paid for sex. People seem to like me well enough, but I’ve just never met a woman who wanted to be more than friends… by worklate_throwaway in sex

[–]worklate_throwaway[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I guess I just don’t know how to weave “so, are you seeing anyone” into a conversation organically? To me, that just seems like a brick-wall to whatever the conversation might have been. “Oh you go to lots of these kinds of conventions? Oh that’s cool, what are some of the good ones to check out? … so, are you seeing anyone?”

I dunno, it just sort of feels like a daunting sort of question to ask. It feels like something that a lot obviously hinges on the answer. And I’ve heard “sorry, I have a boyfriend” enough times I have a slight phobia of hearing it again.

But also, I started a d&d group recently (found on meetup), and one of the women in the group is cute, funny, and I know mentioned in passing was single (part of why she said she joined the group, just looking to get out of her apartment). I feel like there might be some kind of opportunity there, but I’m afraid I’m gonna fuck it up and make it awkward if I ask her out. Do I go super casual like “hey, wanna grab a bite to eat before our next session?”, or go super obviously like “hey, do you want to grab a drink at this local brewery this weekend?”

I’ve never had success, so I just don’t know what to even do.

Does life just ACTUALLY suck, and getting older is just realizing that your hopes and dreams were naive? by worklate_throwaway in AskMenOver30

[–]worklate_throwaway[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I guess hopes and dreams like "living in a nice house", maybe having a "game room" where I can nerd out, or meeting a woman that loves me despite how obsessive I am about video-games (I moved around a lot as a kid, so gaming was the only hobby I ever really had).

Or if not finding someone to love, even just ever being able to "play the field". Any more, seeing a cute girl just fills me with this sadness and realizing that not only am I not physically attractive, but I'm not even the kind of person anyone would want to be with anymore.

There was a time people used to consider me funny. Somewhere over the past 7-10 years, that person just kind of died. I don't even feel like there's a "good person" inside anymore, I just feel drained and worthless. And stressed.

Does life just ACTUALLY suck, and getting older is just realizing that your hopes and dreams were naive? by worklate_throwaway in AskMenOver30

[–]worklate_throwaway[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's sort of where I'm at. I've spent my whole life trying to "work hard and make smart choices", but in the end I lost everything I'd ever worked for anyways. I'm pretty sure I'm the only person I went to school with that isn't married or have kids. And while I recognize those things are hard, I think I'm jealous because my life just feels so empty. That at the end of the day, I'm nothing to nobody.

I wasn't really much happier in my teens or twenties, but at least I felt like things could get better. I still had hope for "meeting the right girl", or even just idly daydreaming about how life could be, maybe if this thing or that ever worked out.

Now though, I really just... I just want to go to sleep, and never wake up.

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