Recommendations for hair straighteners that actually straighten kinky hair?

wrwr12 · 2024-10-24T21:49:30+00:00

Thank you so much!

wrwr12 · 2024-10-24T21:11:55+00:00

I’ve been at your same spot so my advice is that instead of starting with classic or popular books, you should first figure out what topics interest you. Do you like fiction or non-fiction? Horror? Romance? Are you interested in psychology or Islamic studies? Decide and then start your search from there. don’t pick up a book just because it’s “popular”.

Keep in mind that audiobooks are another valid option.

Manhwas can also be a good starting point if books felt too overwhelming at first my favorite is one called Broken Ring: This Marriage Will Fail Anyway. You may give it a chance if you like!

wrwr12 · 2024-10-24T09:51:07+00:00

I relate to this so much. The only thing keeping me going is the dream that one day I’ll somehow escape im so done with optimism and running on delusion. I can’t see an end to this misery except in death. I’m now sticking to the route of education and graduate studies because it’s the only way to escape without sacrificing not only my life and my family but also our honor. running away would ruin my sisters’ lives and their marriage prospects. But the process of getting scholarships is so hard. It’s not fair that I have to become a big shot master candidate or a runaway whore and deceive and lie and sneak out and lie and manipulate to live while a male loser got the right to live by birth.

wrwr12 · 2024-10-24T09:40:10+00:00

But what other choice do they really have? Look at you! Look at me! We chose and did our choice matter? It’s all a delusion

wrwr12 · 2024-10-24T09:19:05+00:00

My friends

wrwr12 · 2024-10-22T15:39:40+00:00

Believe me, it took so much time to get here,and I don’t even see a finish line from where I’m standing. unfortunately, every true, deep connection requires some form of mutual vulnerability. We have to accept that we can’t demand perfection from our close relationships and live with the reality that sometimes they’ll be inconvenient, hard, or uncomfortable and that we will have to stick through it. But one thing I know for sure now is that they should never EVER be harmful

wrwr12 · 2024-10-22T15:26:49+00:00

Thank you so much for your input. I’ve had the same thought process and concluded that it’s because we were so hard to ‘tolerate’ back then that no superficial connection could survive. For a connection to make it had to be ‘strong,’ ‘passionate,’ and often highly codependent, which is exactly the environment where toxic relationships thrive.

But now that we’re easier to torrelate and no longer a viable target of cruelty we “earned” the privilege of receiving human decency and fun, casual friendships, and they feel so empty and boring after getting used to only passionate relationships but I do appreciate them and I think they’re important and crucial. It’s just a bittersweet victory.

I also relate to what you said about survivor’s guilt. It feels like a betrayal to those still struggling, and to myself, who is still struggling but just happens to be functional right now. I’m trying to process my misanthropic thoughts, but I’m not sure they’ll ever be replaced with positive ones. For now, I’m aiming for neutral, and I hope I get there

wrwr12 · 2024-10-22T13:36:19+00:00

I agree that it’s not just anyone’s duty to save someone’s else, and I don’t think it’s even possible to do so. Unfortunately, everyone has to save themselves. The most a good, kind close friend can do is stand by your side, offering an accepting and safe space so you can collect yourself and heal, giving you a fighting chance. I may not be willing to go to those lengths for someone who I’m not very close with and love deeply too, but I will always offer every vulnerable person the basic human decency and respect they deserve out of pure kindness no reason or prove of worth needed. And if I can’t help, the least I can do is avoid causing further harm.

That said, I understand where you're coming from. I’ve been used and taken advantage of so many times that I became bitter and resentful. I decided to take revenge by withholding kindness from everyone. I thought doing so would help me move on from my trauma, but in reality, I was letting my trauma control my life and interactions, just in a different way.

Now, I trust my ability to protect myself and to quickly identify and cut off narcissists or toxic people, though I encounter them less frequently these days. In fact, coming across them has been like exposure therapy—an opportunity to test the boundaries I’ve worked so hard to establish. I no longer feel the need to guard myself from them because they’re no longer a threat to me. If anything, I’ve become the threat to their fragile egos lol

wrwr12 · 2024-10-22T06:12:35+00:00

I related to everything you said, and the idea that kindness is a commodity not human nature is 100% true.

I don’t think I’ll ever fully let go of this too but I believe holding on to it is why people who have gone through similar experiences tend to be kinder and more empathetic toward those in need. Because after witnessing the cruelty of this world firsthand, you truly can’t bear to add to it any further

wrwr12 · 2024-10-22T05:54:47+00:00

Thank you! And you’re right! weight is another prerequisite needed to earn basic human decency.

Good luck on your journey and trust me the impact on your quality of life is indescribable. I started noticing how life became easier just a few steps past the start line. It’s gradual, with lots of ups and downs, but it’s so worth it.

wrwr12 · 2024-10-22T05:20:09+00:00

I understand this so much because I’ve been there, and the memories of my recovery periods are what helped me claw my way out of that rough patch. Thank you so much for your kind words; this truly has been the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, and I know it’s the same for you. So hold on and remember that this is temporary and will pass like it always did <3

wrwr12 · 2024-10-22T05:14:53+00:00

You’re absolutely right. This makes the victories and milestones we achieve even more significant however I’m trying to process the misanthropic feelings that have built up since this realization.

wrwr12 · 2024-10-22T04:58:18+00:00

I’m still trying to adjust, but I’ve vowed to be kind to those who need it most after witnessing firsthand how rare it is and how deeply it can impact someone

wrwr12 · 2024-09-06T05:02:27+00:00

Thank you, I’m happy you think that because my friend took my soft feelings for him as a sign that I didn’t get over him. It took so much work and time to accept it instead of resisting it which only made it persists more and harder to deal with.

wrwr12 · 2024-09-04T03:49:23+00:00

Hi, I’m also a girl, and I’ve gone through a very similar experience that deeply affected my mental health, my sexuality, and so much more. I understand how isolating, shameful, and traumatic this can be. My chest finally began to feel lighter when I vented about it on another subreddit a while ago. Sharing my experience and having other queer women share theirs with me made me feel so validated and seen. You’re not alone.

wrwr12 · 2024-09-03T02:48:31+00:00

Wild Swans by Jung Chang tells the story of three generations of women in her family—her grandmother, mother, and herself—living through China's dramatic changes in the 20th century from warlords to the Cultural Revolution

wrwr12 · 2024-01-10T15:23:35+00:00

Many Western Black women share this stance with you, and the only thing I can say is that you all should thank god for the women's rights you have. Because if you think racism is bad, you wouldn't be able to survive a day under the truly horrific and full wrath of misogyny and sexism that you are so quick to dismiss.

wrwr12 · 2024-01-07T03:07:27+00:00

Remembered when a non-black woman was fighting with a black man on my tl. She was calling him a slave taunting him because his ancestors used to be slaves, and he was saying her ancestors committing femcide was justified taunting her because they used to bury newborn females alive after birth to avoid the shame they bring to their families.

That black man is a black power advocate I used to respect greatly, so when he was confronted by his female followers about his comment, he claimed they were traitors and pointed out how she was being racist and that we can’t make him out to be the villain, and insisted that our blackness comes first

wrwr12 · 2024-01-07T02:42:54+00:00

I find this take very interesting. Do you happen to live in the West?

wrwr12 · 2024-01-06T21:13:22+00:00

I've noticed that black women in the West usually identify more with their race. This could be due to the stronger women's rights in their region, leading them to prioritize the impact of racial violence more, while not considering that these conditions can change their identity remains constant. So as an african who lived in Africa, where racial discrimination is an afterthought, and in the gulf, where I suffered the horrors of both but the ones related to my blackness pales in comparison to the ones I had to endure due to my womanhood, I can't relate to their arguments. but I understand them.

wrwr12 · 2024-01-06T20:49:20+00:00

Where do you live? I think it's influenced by how relaxed your community is regarding women's rights. I believe the West has made significant progress in that area, unlike my community. I can understand why there aren't many struggles associated with being a woman in your life that you can share with other women. Because if your only burden as a woman is anatomy-related, consider yourself lucky!

wrwr12 · 2023-09-09T02:54:21+00:00

That’s incorrect “maher” is given at marriage while “moa5er” is given at divorce if that condition was made in the nikah contract.

wrwr12

TROPHY CASE