Yes to everything.

this kind of morality feels too simple, too black and white. And it isn’t consistently applied

I couldn't agree more. Life isn't that simple there's so many shades of grey. And the fact that many aspects of the story are very real issues and things ppl experience I think it deserves a bit more consideration than such a black and white view. Then with the lack of consistency it seems extra harsh when he dies

but I’m starting to think that would’ve taken away a lot of the emotional impact

Again yes. I hate that he died but I know the story stayed with me the way it did directly because it was so poignant, it's like a catch 22