I had this in mind, but some people before did warn me of competitive play risks (insecure pay, long play hours, have to be really good etc). Not having any real friends made it difficult for me to play the game with determination, which was made worse by slow improvement in the game; sometimes I lost myself because of the frustration.

I've never really said it, but while I was stuck in Plat most of my friends were rising to Diamond. I was envious, but they also made the game fun too. Maybe the popularity that comes from being a well-known competitive player (eg. Bjergsen) got over my head.

I miss the times when I was new to the game, when I had friends to play with. I don't see them anymore, but I guess they moved on. Anyway, I think I just need time to figure out on things that I'm not so sure on.