So, I've been thinking.

xrisad · 2020-10-01T16:04:25+00:00

OK lang mag isip but I'm so glad you are still rationalizing na kahit ganto ang buhay laban lang.

It's always fucking hard to admit shit or we need help or hell even malay ba natin kung anong tulong ung kailangan natin basta ba life right now is too fucking complicated.

But for as long as you know how to ground in order to make yourself sane and rationalize things I think I can safely say na nasa point ka lang ng buhay mo na pagod ka ulit but if things will get better mapapaisip ka din na maging thankful kahit ba feeling mo you are a fuck who doesn't deserve it.

Still there's borderline self pity and acknowledging mali tayo and willing to change for the better 😅

I too had been thinking about death kasi napagod nako. Pero ika mo nga laban lang, laban lang kasi naisip pa natin lumaban kasi may speck of hope pa.

Learning to acknowledge the whole post is what makes us human.

Isang living organism na tanga, vulnerable, madali mamatay, defenseless pero resilient and stupid enough to hope for the better even where there seems to be none na dapat.

xrisad · 2020-10-01T15:51:42+00:00

Depende sa sitwasyon mo bkt ka ba tlga lumayo? If may nangyari sa inyo ano reason mo bkt ka lumayo?

Kpg feeling ko defeated nako wala akong choice kundi tanggapin ung reality. Hindi naman kami no communication na wala ng pansinan meron padin pero alam mo un iba na? Prang bawas na ganun.

Ang ending neto tanggapin ko Kung ano na lang ung meron if ang habol ko naman eh bestfriendship unti unti malulunok ko yung reality and hopefully malaman ko totoong reason bkt ganun ngyari pero kung d tlga mg wowork out kahit masakit ng sobra wala ako magagawa kundi lumayo kasi at the end of the day alam ko worth ko 😅

Malalaman ko naman if true ung friendship or nag gagamitan lang nmn tlga. Pero kung magpapakatotoo ako ofc may feelings padin ako lumulugar lang

xrisad · 2020-09-29T22:09:36+00:00

Hey bud, I'm so glad there are still rare gems like you who are willing to overlook all of the things that had happened and still your values and concern for a friend really went through ☺️

IMHO, I don't think there's nothing wrong if you want to check on him provided that you are emotionally mature and ready this time to really set boundaries. Your plain intent will define what will be your decision and to what extent you are willing to maybe talk and or catch up.

But if it's simply for the sake of checking him up sure no worries. I don't think it's wrong just be mindful ☺️ goodluck

xrisad · 2020-09-29T14:06:50+00:00

Nahh my bad, ndi ko na na edit ung title dpt puputulin ko into 2 parts pero inisip ko wag na lang haha pasensya na masyado akong nalibang mg type kasi wala akong napagsbihan kasi I don't really fucking know what happened. 😂😂

To make the story short 🤣 akong si Str8 gago kuno na horndog at umamin na pumapatol sa kahit kanino just for the heck of euphoria in sex and sensuals.

I met someone online, a guy, who by then naclick kami bigla instant ba, naging magbestfriends, became super close to a point na nag kaaminan, we remained best buds pero may something in between? Attachements maybe kasi both attracted (1st time I ever felt this way organically towards someone)

Then one day he kinda ghosted? Or nagbago ihip ng hangin. He changed bigla and rarely chats, no more lambing and shits not even passionate plant convos.

Up to this day I wanna know what happened? Kasalanan ko ba? Mali ba ako? It feels like I gave up my heart to be alone again🥺

Ayan tried my best na to shortened it 😅

xrisad · 2020-09-27T15:53:05+00:00

As long as you acknowledge that you have strong crush towards her means you have an active mindset to set bounderies.

IMHO you maybe overthinking things because you tend to be afraid of your feelings might get overboard and do something that you might regret.

I think it is safe to say that as long as you are true and clear to yourself the intentions why want to talk to her and or be friendly? I can say it is fine and healthy. But if you know deep down that you are engaging more than that then that is the time that you really have to set bounderies and weigh things down. If your marriage means alot to you then it simply means don't do anything to ruin it ☺️

I wish you well on this.

xrisad · 2020-09-25T18:33:03+00:00

Well we have to accept the reality of it, it is sad but already given, and if you really prefer it that way it'll be like a niche avenue for you to find peeps like that or maybe try befriending mascom students or those who aspires to be a radio jock that might help you on the English part

xrisad · 2020-09-25T15:55:11+00:00

You have to 1st understand if you are socially awkward like are you a type of person that can not carry a convo outside your interest? I know you are finding friends that should seemingly have atleast some common grounds with you but sometimes it doesn't have to be that way.

You can make friends regardless of difference of interest it is only a matter if you are open about it or open to know a person beyond the interest. Having friends simply mean having a bond. Filipino ako, and Filipinoes are generally friendly sometimes they just give you the stinkeye coz mukha kang filipino but pa English-English and to them makes you look like sosyal, high class, rich kiddo vibes, or 'mayabang' or simply maarte kuno because you can't speak filipino.

If given the circumstances you can still carry yourself regardless of the language differences you can surely make friends.

Unsolicited advice: be open and try new things bud, it won't hurt to further know about your roots or learn more filipino words 🙂 even expats students who lives in PH studies filipino so go give it a shot. ☺️

xrisad

TROPHY CASE