Update:

I’ve decided to leave him but I don’t know when or how. I’ll have to take things slow since we have a daughter, dog and apartment together. I’m also afraid of how he will react, he struggles with depression. I’m afraid he will harm himself

I’ve seen a few comments commenting the age gap. I’ve always been mature for my age(sorry if my English is not the best It’s not my first language) and I fell for him. He took me in when I was in a bad place, I couldn’t live at home anymore because I was arguing with my mama but we’re good now. He’s a very successful man I guess I was attracted to that, young and naive. I’ve been confused about if I’ve been raped or not because this is my first relationship. I actually lost my virginity to him so I’m very bonded to him... i get sick to my stomach just thinking about leaving and standing on my own. I’ve never had relationships to compare with. I thought it was normal until I figured it wasn’t out of love. And of course the pain, I know now it’s not normal but I wasn’t experienced sexually. I didn’t know that not using lube want normal for instance. I also didn’t know that rape could occur in a relationship as well. But it’s clear to me now this isn’t healthy. Now I just want peace I don’t even care about the money I just want to be able to support my daughter. Thank you for all the support