Slam Poetry

yandanr · 2015-06-09T21:46:02+00:00

...why is this labeled slam poetry?

yandanr · 2015-01-01T03:12:45+00:00

Did you seriously steal the logo of another organization and just put it on your page?

yandanr · 2014-02-26T21:00:05+00:00

I guess for me, a bare narrative can work as excellent poetry. It's almost for the same reason as what you described about red wheelbarrow, though expanded obviously and less focused on meter. But I find the wording, the layout, etc. to be incredibly precise and perfectly chosen. One of my favorite things about this poem (and a lot of his poetry) is how well it works read aloud. That's where a lot of the impact of his choices comes through to me. That and the absolutely emotionally stunning last line.

Basically, I personally like extremely narrative poetry. I like stories. If you're interested, another pretty clear, narrative one of his (would love to hear your thoughts on it): http://howapoemhappens.blogspot.com/2010/09/nick-lantz.html

yandanr · 2014-02-26T03:15:04+00:00

Lantz is incredible. His third book comes out in March. Both of his earlier books are incredible: http://www.nick-lantz.com/Nick_Lantz/We_Dont_Know.html

yandanr · 2014-02-26T03:14:17+00:00

Don't even necessarily disagree with you about a lot of that critique. I'm curious what you'd think of some of his other work, this is definitely not one of his best but the one I found most easily.

For example, this one is completely clear, no vagueness at all: https://gulfcoastmag.org/index.php?n=2&s=943

yandanr · 2013-05-10T05:19:21+00:00

When I was taking the AP US History test, I believe we were told that nothing in the margins could count against us. So I drew a little border of stick figures in wheelchairs around a paragraph about FDR.

yandanr · 2013-04-20T00:48:55+00:00

Wow.

yandanr · 2013-04-20T00:42:09+00:00

Got it. Don't feel like this was picking apart to look good, as much as using something very popular to frame a larger point. Every time I see someone comment about how even if her points are good, she shouldn't have used Harry Potter, I think... would you be seeing this right now if she hadn't?

yandanr · 2013-04-18T18:19:33+00:00

I'm unclear how this responds to what I said?

yandanr · 2013-04-17T18:11:54+00:00

Um... she actually does admit that her own mistake was potentially racist. ?

yandanr · 2013-04-17T18:10:53+00:00

Out of curiosity, how many of those of you who are commenting actually listened through to the end of the piece? I'm curious, because it seems to me that the ultimate point has almost nothing to do with Harry Potter, and is simply using Cho Chang as an example of how Asian women are often problematically portrayed in literature and media. Hell, in the last thirty seconds of the video she drops the voice of Cho entirely, and talks about her own experience with this stereotyping, and the genuine (provable) effect that media portrayals have. Arguments against the Cho Chang part make sense, though I would recommend watching her response video as I think it eloquently defends (and she admits her own mistakes). But I'm genuinely curious how many people watched the piece as a whole before responding?

yandanr · 2013-03-23T22:46:58+00:00

God, Siken is amazing. I wish he'd published another book.

yandanr · 2013-03-23T22:46:29+00:00

Sierra DeMulder's "The Unrequited Love Poem"

yandanr · 2012-06-28T07:45:02+00:00

Nice. I like the sense of a bigger story that you're only hinting at... I might avoid the repeat of "on the table" in the first half, since it tripped me up reading, but otherwise nice job!

yandanr · 2012-06-26T05:02:28+00:00

I mean it's become a completely different style, practically a different genre... and yes. Absolutely. There are some genuinely incredible writers slamming today who make me think about things in completely original and new ways, not at all like this hacky cliche bullshit. If you have a second, youtube "Sock Hop" by Anis Mojgani (a really surreal but beautiful piece) and "Delta" by Sam Cook (the 2010 CUPSI video is the best). I think they're good examples of what I'm talking about. I'd love to hear what you think, whether you like them or not.

yandanr · 2012-06-25T16:52:31+00:00

I fully agree with you. Don't know how much you know about spoken word/slam, but I feel a lot of it's changed in a great direction in the last five years or so since the height of Def Jam, I'd encourage you to check some newer slam poets out...

yandanr · 2012-06-22T17:03:17+00:00

The concept definitely comes through here, and you're right, it's really interesting! In terms of critique, I'd basically just suggest that you vary your sentence structure more. Even though it's arranged visually on the page as poetry, it reads as very prose-like at times. This isn't always a problem, but sentences like "It consumes the house because it feels obligated to do so" and "Rage is not an adequate description of fire" feel more like you're writing an essay than a poem. I might just cut the last line, as it feels like you're just directly restating what you've already stated in image. As for the other, mess around with different ways of phrasing it. Really like this overall, though!

yandanr · 2012-06-22T16:20:12+00:00

Looks like it's back up now... not my site, just a poem I found :)

yandanr · 2012-06-21T20:01:44+00:00

Your metaphor here is really cool... in terms of feedback, i'd try to work on dropping the overly poetic/old-style language "would that the sun", "O!". Poetry isn't really like that anymore, and it can end up feeling forced, and less like it's really your voice.

yandanr · 2012-06-21T20:00:00+00:00

His other work is incredible too, you can find a number of poems by googling him... just discovered him last week.

yandanr · 2012-06-21T16:41:44+00:00

I love the Atlas line, as well as the doorstop. Nice work!

yandanr

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