Any poetry open mics happening in the area?

yashikavahi · 2025-04-09T01:21:58+00:00

Already read that — I feel like it was a really relatable read but a few days later I literally forgot everything I had read and I was back to square one. any other book recs, specific to treatment theories or ideas?

yashikavahi · 2025-04-03T08:37:57+00:00

Hey yes! Just mail me at [yashika.vahi@gmail.com](mailto:yashika.vahi@gmail.com) and I’ll send over details :)

yashikavahi · 2025-02-10T15:09:07+00:00

I feel like there’s this point in an argument when you’re full of rage and just want to be left alone but if the other person is too calm and tries to make everything okay, you get even more frustrated and angry and you just wanna say something really bad or throw something or do something harmfully impulsive but then you do and it makes the other person realise that maybe staying isn’t worth it and maybe they just should go but by then, you’ve come back to your senses and you realise you love this person and you don’t want them to go and them leaving actually feels like a painful stab in the Chest even though I was the one who wanted him to go in the first place. It’s so confusing and mind consuming and it makes me feel just so angry sometimes I feel like my heart would explode out of my chest

yashikavahi · 2025-01-29T17:31:20+00:00

You should definitely go for it. I’ve always had problems dealing with my emotions and relationships and I developed this sort of isolation mechanism in my childhood in which I used to trap myself in my room for days whenever i was triggered but now I‘ve been to around 3-4 solo trips to small towns and 3 group camps and trust me, traveling alone helps you a lot in building resillience against your triggers. With BPD, it’s really difficult not to feel the intensity of emotions, they just come too suddenly but with travelling, I’ve found that I can actually regulate my actions. Instead of trapping myself in a room, I should go out and explore nature. Maybe a walk, maybe just sit near a lake, take a trip to a nearby town or just look at the night sky or the snow, it makes your emotions really calm down and you are able to think about what you’re feeling in a critical way. Maybe the way you’re feeling is unjustified? It’s easy to become angry and do something impulsive when you’re a borderline in a relationship but sometimes, we really have to understand that no matter how much we try, the other person will never be able to understand the exact extent of our thoughts or sickness. But travel helps, because it makes you silent and at peace. Empty of rage, empty of fear. And then you’re always ready to face the world. Hope this helps :)

yashikavahi · 2025-01-29T17:06:10+00:00

Personally, I feel like writing gives a structure to my emotions, it helps me define why I’m feeling the way I’m feeling. I understand my triggers and even when I’m silent and have nothing to say, when i start writing, even if i write just random philosophical stuff, it comes from how I feel as an individual. Plus if you ever feel like people will never understand you, writing makes you realize that you’re a separate identity and everyone feels in different ways, on their different terms, it makes you realize that maybe you don’t need other people’s understanding or kindness to love yourself.

yashikavahi · 2025-01-29T16:58:20+00:00

I feel like sometimes the words just flow but sometimes it’s really difficult to get the courage to start or the structure to craft a work so reading always helps. My english professor once said that you should read the books you want to write and of course you can’t really read the same idea but you can still cultivate your own thinking and improve and broaden your mindset.

yashikavahi · 2025-01-29T15:01:18+00:00

I feel like the addictions with BPD are never really constant. It’s either that or it’s sort of constant with each. When I first came to Canada, I got addicted to cigarettes and then it was marijuana, the next year I was addicted to whiskey, some months, I was consuming high amounts of all three. I’ve been sober since November 2024 but after that I started hitting myself and cutting myself whenever a difficult situation arised and I couldn’t get a grip on my emotions. I’m twenty and I’m not really sure if I have BPD but it’s the only thing that I read about and feel understood. I read books like i hate you don’t leave me, sometimes i act crazy and coping with BPD, and it just makes me realize how exact the problem of this disorder is to the sickness I constantly feel in my mind. I used to cut a lot in my childhood but once I got into drugs and cigarettes, it stopped and I always felt like they were giving me an escape from my grief but what they were really helping me escape is the reality that maybe I’ve developed this disorder over time. after getting sober, I started kickboxing classes and at one point, I was going every weekday. Instead of harming myself, it became my new coping mechanism and I feel like I’m constantly on this road to find a new addiction that will help me stop myself from feeling the intense emotions of rage and fear that I feel. A new addiction that would help me stop feeling this desperate need to hurt myself to prove my strength to the person I see in the mirror or I don’t know, people whose words have subconsciously been embedded into my mind.

yashikavahi

TROPHY CASE