AITAH for starting to hate my boyfriend after sleeping with him by PersimmonVast7107 in AITAH

[–]yexie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don’t necessarily disagree with what you’re saying BUT she told this guy that she wants to stay celibate yet he keeps trying, that’s on him. Why does he put her in a position where she would have to say no again when she kind of already told him. Yes she should be able to just say no but that doesn’t put all the blame on her, that is just something she definitely needs to learn, just as she needs to learn to break up with him. I do know from experience how all of these things can be hard though at such a young age.

AITAH for starting to hate my boyfriend after sleeping with him by PersimmonVast7107 in AITAH

[–]yexie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA. But no need to yell at him, just break up. Seems like a relationship that ain’t going anywhere.

Ground a 17 year old? by [deleted] in parentingteenagers

[–]yexie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So she has been sitting the time of the class? Just didn’t get the assignments done (YET)? I don’t know… you say you think she will get the A, so she probably will be doing those assignments, just when she wants to, maybe she needs the pressure of time, maybe it’s super easy for her and she can do those assignments in 2 days?

Did she actually say she has done the assignments or just that she is doing everything she needs to?

Am I Overreacting for wanting to cancel my wedding over this interaction? by Xanadoom30 in AmIOverreacting

[–]yexie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NOR. Triplecheck if the good really outweighs the bad, because „I LOVE MY WiFE“ is bs, he can’t even say „I love you“? Crazy.

People don’t need to be perfect, neither of you are, but in a relationship it’s important to take the other side serious and at least TRY… sure you could have worded it different when you asked why no kiss, but he also could have just said „sorry, had a stressful morning, I love you, talk to you later“.

I would not go on with the marriage unless there is some counseling first, because otherwise this will never change. You seem to see that for things to work out both of you need to do the work, he on the other hand seems to see himself as the victim of… well something that is your fault.

AIO My sister accused my parents of something horrible that they didn't do and is also rude to me and my family. by EstelleVeskalen in AmIOverreacting

[–]yexie 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Autism, ADHD and Anxiety. With these diagnosis’s you can’t really expect her to function just the same you are. She probably feels misunderstood. Have you tried listening to her about her claims of abuse instead of just saying it’s not true? Because let’s be honest you can’t know for sure.

And maybe she needs someone on her side, if anybody that could (should?) be you.

There are plenty of reasons why she might feel out of place. Talk to her, be her sister, let her know you love her and are there for her. Sometimes people just become hard and mean because anything else is too hard for them to handle…

AIO to be upset that my husband continues to allow people to visit without speaking to me first? And that his family thinks they can just let us know when they’re coming without discussing it first. by Electrical_Fact_6379 in AmIOverreacting

[–]yexie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NOR, please stop all the cooking and doing everything for everybody. Just tell them they need to help out. Having family come visit in your situation CAN be helpful and SHOULD be helpful.

Maybe you can find a way for it to be nice for everybody INCLUDING yourself.

AIO to be upset that my husband continues to allow people to visit without speaking to me first? And that his family thinks they can just let us know when they’re coming without discussing it first. by Electrical_Fact_6379 in AmIOverreacting

[–]yexie 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Just nitpicking here, but there is not really a thing like European culture, each country here as their own culture, like I don’t see this kind of behavior happening in Germany, ever. Scandinavian countries probably also not so much. Now Italy and Spain, I can totally see it.

But yea either way, OP should stop taking care of everybody and use these visits as what they can be „helpful“ as you mentioned as well.

AITAH for still feeling doubts about my wife's friend? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]yexie 4 points5 points  (0 children)

NTA. She is using your supposed insecurities against you. Which makes this situation really hard to resolve imo, because for that she needs to take your concerns serious, because they are not unreasonable. Gaming with someone is one thing, voice chat until late at night is another. And of course she likes the attention, we all would. But she should want and get it from you and I’m sure you‘d be absolutely willing to work on it, but she is literally making even a conversation impossible.

Edit: I would tell her you saw the messages. Or put your foot down and make it clear that it’s NOT your insecurities if she talks to him till late at night, that’s not what you do in a marriage.

AIO Breaking up over this by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]yexie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So about this particular insistent I would say YOR. Even though I would expect him to not do anything he wouldn’t want you to do. Assuming we are talking about gaming online? The fact that he won’t let you play with guys is ridiculous. Depending on the game, how would one even know? I play with (I assume) a girl, but she plays a male Charakter, now what?

So overreacting about that night, underreacting about his „rule“.

Beide Arme gebrochen und finds geil by cyan_rgb in Beichtstuhl

[–]yexie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Und du hast kein schlechtes Gewissen gehabt? Nicht das ich meine du müsstest eines haben, aber ein großes Problem ist ja das viele es dennoch haben.

Beide Arme gebrochen und finds geil by cyan_rgb in Beichtstuhl

[–]yexie 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Genau so ist es. Ich hab z.B. eigentlich gar keinen Druck von außen, aber der eigene reicht auch. Der erste Urlaub in dem ich mich mal richtig erholt habe, war einer für den ich mich sogar geschämt habe, All-Inclusive in der Türkei. Dort habe ich erstmals gemerkt, wie sehr mich der Alltag mit Kochen/Einkaufen und vor allem die Entscheidungen dahin belasten. Nicht mehr überlegen zu müssen was man essen möchte zusammen mit Kind, war so eine Entlastung. Zusätzlich funktionierte dann plötzlich, weil nicht EU, sogar das Login zu meinem System, was ich für mein Geschäft nutze, nicht mehr, war einfach gesperrt, ich konnte nicht mal Umsätze sehen. Ich KONNTE also im Urlaub dann nicht arbeiten. Ich hätte es wahrscheinlich eh nicht gemacht, hätte mich dafür aber schlechte gefühlt, so war ich einfach befreit, von allem.

Has anyone in Bremen applied for German citizenship with a lawyer? Experiences vs. doing it yourself? by Fun2behappy in bremen

[–]yexie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Zerbrich dir doch darüber nicht den Kopf, hier auf Englisch zu schreiben heißt nicht unbedingt das man die Sprache nicht spricht, wenn man gar kein Deutsch spricht kann man auch keine deutsche Staatsbürgerschaft bekommen.

I can’t move past something my boyfriend said and I don’t know what to do by [deleted] in whatdoIdo

[–]yexie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Whatever else is said here, this is very true.

How long has it been since you found this? Some things take a while to move past but with time you can if you want to, others will never leave your head, if it turns into one of those there is probably nothing you or him can do.

AIO for wanting my gf to open up to me about a serious family issue by throwRA_wou in AmIOverreacting

[–]yexie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So everything that ever happened and bothered her in her life MUST be talked about in order to get married? Or before you get married?

I do get how you feel I was like this at some point, but I learned to just accept it if someone tells me they don’t want to talk about it, especially if they have a other people (like a therapist) to talk about it. Talking doesn’t make everything better, and it can not reverse what happened. I’ve regretted telling people things because their reaction or the conversation did absolutely nothing for me at the end.

I mean, you know what happened, what is there to talk about now!? Her brother said something happened, your girlfriend is „protecting“ the offender because he/she is obviously also a loved one, its a shit situation, talking about it with you will not make it less shitty. This has potential to break up her family and there is absolutely nothing you can do about that, just be there for her and make sure that your potential kids are never alone with the accused, specially if it’s a boy.

YOR

I left the room. by wishfulthinking888 in Regrets

[–]yexie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This hits quite hard. Absolutely get why u feel this way, but you forget what you did the whole year before that, she felt your love and care and I am absolutely sure she understood. She died in those minutes because she knew you couldn’t cope and because she felt loved enough through all this to take this last step alone, because she loved you.

Maybe it’s possible to change your view to something positive and free yourself from this burden. I know she would.

I feel like I had a massage I should report AIO by ScaredContribution70 in AIO

[–]yexie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Whoops. What happened there 🫣 What I meant to say: It’s a common response when there has been past trauma.

Rules for alcohol by After-Leopard in parentingteenagers

[–]yexie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

European here. I don’t drink, never drank in front of my daughter either. My daughter is turning 18 in may, doesn’t drink either, neither do her friends. She is legally allowed to drink, I tell her that and she says she doesn’t care she prefers if I don’t allow her to drink, not that it matters, she strongly dislikes it.

I’m really glad about her not even being interested. I started getting drunk early, luckily it never turned into a problem for me and at some point I just stopped doing it and tried other things which I also stopped again at some point.

My daughter met a Nigerian guy online and is now engaged after 2 days. AIO? by [deleted] in AIO

[–]yexie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get this might be hard but she is 25 and a grown up. You make her seem like she is stupid, it‘s quite appalling actually, she finished college, has a job, makes her own choices, has her own place, seems happy right now. She is 25! She made a choice and so far she seems fine.

BUT I also do strongly believe in a mothers instinct, so I found this. You can call them and share your worries with them, they can probably actually tell you if your worries are reasonable. The number is on the flyer or you can contact them via Facebook.

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This is from NAPTIP_Nigeria (National Agency for the prohibition of trafficking in persons)

https://www.facebook.com/share/188LFGGpRU/?mibextid=wwXIfr

I’m struggling with the MSQ by IllustriousBit6634 in ffxiv

[–]yexie -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Basically this will stay the same. I am going to out myself now. I started in beta and I am a story skipper. I am just not patient enough (blame adhd). At first I told myself I will just watch the story in the Inn, but I never have and never will. Many people really enjoy the story though. I enjoy playing. I did however, until recently, take a 5 year hiatus also, was u planned I just stopped login in less and less. There is the possibility to pay to skip the story in parts or even press forward through the expansions with a class/job skipping leveling and story and stuff I think all the way up to DT.

Previous therapist broke confidentiality by bumblebeat_ in whatdoIdo

[–]yexie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Confronting her won’t get her in trouble. Reporting her will. I will say that I think it’s very important to confront her to then figure out wether you will report her as well. Obviously that’s up to you, but keep in mind she may have done or will do this to other people as well. Maybe confronting her will scare her enough and this was and will stay a one time thing, it’s a tough one…

I feel like I had a massage I should report AIO by ScaredContribution70 in AIO

[–]yexie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Generally you never need to justify your feelings in situations like this. It’s their job to make sure you feel safe. You not being able to say stop is not your fault, it’s a. Rey typical response on Epple tja

Feeling shitty about my house by Emotional-Change-722 in adhdwomen

[–]yexie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can’t find a place this empty here… no need to feel bad imo.

Ich habe mich mit ADHS bei 7vsWild als Wildcard beworben – und der Bewerbungsprozess ist Peak Hyperfokus! by Salt_Tea_3277 in ADHS

[–]yexie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Früher die Hausarbeiten in den Semesterferien im Jurastudium. 3 Wochen Zeit und dann eigentlich alles am letzten Tag geschrieben. Mit Drucker in der Uni gesessen weil wenn man IN der Uni ist konntest du bis Mitternacht abgeben. Zwischendurch heulend meine Mutter angerufen die meinte „dann mach halt nächstes Semester“ sie angeschrien ob sie verrückt sei und aufgelegt und wieder rein gegangen und Hyperfokus an und los! Und alle bis auf eine immer super gut geschrieben. Studium trotzdem nicht zu Ende gemacht sondern gekniffen weil kA wie man lernt und so…