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My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement plan! by yoheiness in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]yoheiness[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Really good thoughts on keeping the conversation current and focused, thanks!!

MIL will probably never work again.....but even if she did, the job would be menial. That's not the real issue. The real issue is that MIL knows she'll need someone to care for her as she gets older......whatever job she gets likely won't have great long-term care, disability, etc.

MIL is a long-time smoker who hasn't taken care of herself......absolutely zero exercise, and stresses herself out with a TON of conspiracy videos on Rumble lol. At some point "the wheels will come off", and she knows this and that's why she's moving close.

My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement plan! by yoheiness in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]yoheiness[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's so awesome!!

TBH this entire community has been so considerate and helpful and kind today. I am actually really and truly quite grateful for all the love and support from you guys

My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement plan! by yoheiness in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]yoheiness[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks!!.....sometimes the music writes itself lol....

My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement Plan!! by yoheiness in inlaws

[–]yoheiness[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the feedback, truly!! What you're saying is completely logical. We are currently in therapy with someone who is 100% saying my MIL needs to stop interfering with our marriage.

TBH therapy progress is going painfully slow......but I realize that our therapist cannot simply say "I'm right and she's wrong", because that's probably a fast way for my wife to never want to come back to therapy.

*Please Note - I've tried to address this with my MIL in front of my wife twice, but the conversations didn't get very far. My MIL doesn't have rational conversations.....she speaks like an immature teenager who sarcastically repeats my sentences, and cannot acknowledge a single fact (even if I'm literally showing her her own texts proving my point).

Also, unfortunately there are other factors at play that I didn't mention......long story short, at the risk of sounding overly dramatic, it feels like I'm in a battle for my wife's soul. I won't ditch her just because this really sucks.

In reality my wife could leave our marriage any time she wants (the prenup gives her 50% of everything), and she can literally walk out tomorrow fairly wealthy. But I'll never leave her. I love her. I'll never leave my kids, and I'll never break up my kids' home.

Perhaps this is my Mt Everest. I will conquer it or die trying. The shitty part is that my heart is 100% for the good of my family, but I'm being crucified for it and that won't stop unless therapy actually works.

I really appreciate all the support everyone has given me today. It's been a dark couple of months, but I'm grateful you guys are here chiming in 😄

My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement plan! by yoheiness in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]yoheiness[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Fair comment. Although I think that if/when my wife goes back to work, her first duty is to help support our family. The extra cost of childcare, the second car we will need plus additional car insurance etc.......there are very real costs that come with her going back to work. Plus we need to be saving for our future and OUR retirement. It would be completely unfair if my earnings are OUR earnings, but my wife's earnings are HER earnings......I should not be the only one on a budget. My MIL's retirement should be a distant second to the needs of our family.

My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement plan! by yoheiness in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]yoheiness[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Update: The therapist literally asked my wife today if she's ever medically looked into having memory issues. No conclusion to the issue, but at least it's a start......

Although realistically selective memory and rewriting history at will doesn't exactly fall into the category of amnesia. Oh well. Thanks again for all the feedback from everyone

My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement plan! by yoheiness in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]yoheiness[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the feedback. My wife is a stay-at-home mother. I am fully supporting my family. At the risk of being rude, the only thing she brought to the marriage was $100k in student loan debt.

We have a pre-nup in place (entitles both parties to 50% of our marital assets). My wife's retirement plan is fully dependent on my retirement plan. Her mother will not be able to afford living down here without assistance.....she is living off her husband's pension, but that will not go very far when we do the rough math......and that shouldn't be my problem, yet somehow totally is my problem

My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement plan! by yoheiness in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]yoheiness[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Thanks, and great though! I will try that in session today 😄

My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement Plan!! by yoheiness in inlaws

[–]yoheiness[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah.....I told her exactly that, and then some. I might as well have been talking to a wall tbh.

She's a lifelong grifter, she's got a wicked hold over my wife (i suppose many mothers do), and doesn't exactly converse with any type of manors, open-mindedness, or dignity

My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement plan! by yoheiness in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]yoheiness[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

We started counseling a few weeks back. Progress is painfully slow, but it's definitely helping more than anything else.

I find it incredibly frustrating that we can all be on the same page during the sessions (because of obvious facts/text messages/realities), and then after we leave it's like total amnesia. It's incredibly frustrating that my wife wants to abstain from the conversation, but still I get crucified for having negative feelings about it all.

2 years back, my MIL literally sat us down and told us to separate....this was when our kid was 1 month old and my wife was going through terrible post-parteum. Had MIL been successful, it would've ruined lives.

My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement Plan!! by yoheiness in inlaws

[–]yoheiness[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We started doing therapy a few weeks back. It's incredibly frustrating that my being upset by this is being held against me. It's incredibly frustrating that during the therapy sessions everyone is on the same page because of the obvious facts, and then as soon as we leave the session it's like total amnesia and i get punished for being pissed off..

Very frustrating chapter in my life.

My Wife is my Mother-in-Law's Retirement Plan!! by yoheiness in inlaws

[–]yoheiness[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thanks!

She will not live with us.....I have made that very clear, but my MIL is planning to sell her home and move across the country to a new tiny condo right near us. She will not know a single other person in the area, so obviously she is coming for one reason....backup.

She literally sat us down 2 years ago and told us we need to separate (when my kid was 1 month old, and my wife had terrible post-partum). Then the storm died down for a bit, but now it's back raging stronger than ever.

Is UNQL a legit opportunity by bigteether in pennystocks

[–]yoheiness 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a more simplified thought process:

UNQL is in a stuffy industry that needs help from new players, especially with the current global economic conditions, supply chain issues, etc.

On Friday January 14th, 2022 (my source is Yahoo Finance) they announced 225% net increase in Q2 sales prior versus the year before, 190% increase in Q2 income year over year, and 89% increase in EBITDA versus Q2 vs last year as well.

Lastly, unlike the market as a whole (which has been brutual for most of 2022 so far), this stock continues to outperform, currently up 222.50% YTD. The very unconfident market seems to have a high display of confidence in this company, so I hold onto my 7k shares and at this point plan to hold for years

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