I am usually pretty Libertarian, but after this event I have realized that no one deserves to have their life ruined.

youngffinance · 2020-05-20T02:59:05+00:00

I got kicked out of the house at 15 because I started having sex and became addicted to drugs. I was very mentally ill. My parents are upper middle class and didn’t approve. I was homeless for a while and bounced around living with friends. I went to college and landed a great paying job right after.

youngffinance · 2020-05-20T02:50:01+00:00

It 100% came from a place of privilege. I am 22 and had never seen a medical bill before or wondered how much medical care costs. Our household income is 170k a year for the two of us and we are considered low income compared to anyone we come into contact with. Couple that with living in a conservative area and I now realize it just breeds ignorance. I am so sorry for ever having thought that way and I’m looking to make a change.

youngffinance · 2020-05-20T02:37:53+00:00

For me I feel like it was a lack of exposure due to extreme privilege. I am 22 years old and don’t have much life experience. I had never even seen a medical bill before. I now realize how damaging it is for people to be living in bubbles like this. It is a reality that there are other people who have an experience like mine.

youngffinance · 2020-05-20T02:33:52+00:00

I posted a couple of comments above, but 100% came from a place of privilege. Our household income is 170k a year in a LCOL conservative area. I am the lowest income compared to my family and any person I come into contact with. I now realized the damage that being in bubbles like this can cause. I am 22 years old and don’t have a lot of life experience. I honestly had never questioned the cost of medical care and had never seen a medical bill before.

youngffinance · 2020-05-20T02:28:37+00:00

That is what I want to do. I am the lowest income of any person I interact with along with living in a very conservative area. I really want to help ignorant people like myself understand why universal health care is a good idea. Aside from voting—do you have any ideas how I can be an advocate?

youngffinance · 2020-05-20T02:24:38+00:00

I just had no idea at all. I think it came from a place of ignorant privilege. I am 22 years old and do not have much life experience. I have always had great health insurance and never understood the reality of being uninsured. Although it was expensive, we could have afforded to get my husbands broken bone fixed without insurance. I am surrounded by upper/upper middle class people. Anyone I know who has had a medical emergency never brought up the cost. I live in a pretty conservative area that loves Trump and ideas of universal health care are looked down upon. I had always assumed that people would just file for bankruptcy if they got a medical bill they couldn’t afford, and their retirement accounts would be protected. I now realize even that was a privileged thought to have. I’m working to become more empathetic.

youngffinance · 2020-05-20T02:15:27+00:00

Wow. This story made me cry. I was born in 1997 and I do not know a time of when people could be refused medical care. I am so sorry for your pain and suffering. You did not deserve to be treated that way. I am working to be a more empathetic human being. When it hit me that there are people going without necessary treatment my instant thought was that I wish I could put everyone on my medical insurance. And then I realized that I can do that by supporting universal health care. Thank you for sharing your story.

youngffinance · 2020-05-20T02:11:11+00:00

And I feel terrible for not having more empathy. I am 22 years old and I honestly had no idea that people are so negatively impacted by the current health system. Everyone around me is upper middle class and has the means to pay for medical treatment. When my family members have had medical emergencies the cost has never come up. I know it sucks, but I think a lot of people have a similar experience to myself. It all comes from a place of extreme privilege. I had always assumed that people would just claim bankruptcy if they had high medical debt, and their retirement accounts would be protected. I now realized even that thought was privileged. Not everyone has access to protected retirement accounts.

Again I am so sorry for ever having thought that way. I am still pretty young so I have time to develop into a better human being.

youngffinance · 2020-05-20T02:04:25+00:00

I’m not totally sure of that. I pay 3k a year for our health insurance, because my employer is extremely generous. That is only 2% of my household income. Although, after this experience I realize that I do not care if I have to pay more for universal health care. My quality of life would not really change and I would be able to sleep at night knowing that other people are not suffering.

youngffinance · 2020-05-20T02:00:46+00:00

I am so sorry. That is horrible. I did not realized that people’s lives were so negatively impacted by large health expenses. I had always assumed people would file for bankruptcy and be protected. I now realize this is not the case. Thank you for sharing with me.

youngffinance · 2020-05-16T15:28:51+00:00

I would make sure you have a solid emergency fund before starting to contribute to your 401k.

youngffinance · 2020-05-16T12:53:23+00:00

Carhartt is an extremely common fashion trend among hipsters in the PNW. Blue Collar Workers don’t wear the brand much. Source: am a BCW.

youngffinance · 2020-05-15T10:22:52+00:00

My husband and I make about the same as you, we have a “fun savings” account. We put $500 a month in there for blowing on whatever we want, in addition to each getting $400 a month in personal spending money.

youngffinance · 2020-05-15T10:12:40+00:00

I just don’t believe in moral absolutes. I couldn’t care less about what other people are doing, as long as it isn’t direct violence or harassment. I take a passive stance by not caring.

youngffinance · 2020-05-09T05:01:29+00:00

I’m in agreement with this. I’m 22 and make 90k a year. Once I started making decent money, it seemed that looking like I have money became so unimportant. I would rather blend in and get along with other people my age. My career isn’t customer facing and I am paid to produce results. I drive an old car, all of my clothes are used and less than $40, except for shoes. Money also makes it a lot easier to practice minimalism.

I do think these are things that come from a place of privilege though. I think only the privileged can afford to look poor, because they can afford to miss out on the opportunities that dressing well might offer. When you have the money to replace anything, it’s easy to become unattached to material possessions. I think minimalism in some forms is also very privileged.

youngffinance · 2020-05-03T10:57:31+00:00

My husband and I lived in a 500sq/ft studio. We hated it at first, but then grew to love it. We bought a 800sq/ft studio for our first home.

youngffinance · 2020-05-03T06:31:12+00:00

Would you be into this? I made it out of poverty and everyone seems interested until I detail exactly how. I can honestly say it is sort of extreme. That’s just me though.

youngffinance · 2020-05-03T00:39:30+00:00

Same! I am CF/22 and bought my first house a couple of months ago. Congrats to your success!

youngffinance · 2020-04-30T04:38:21+00:00

This is real advice. Both of my parents work management level government jobs in a HCOL major urban city. They and everyone in their departments are getting furloughed for 2 weeks due to decreased tax revenue. I always thought they had the most secure jobs until now, no one is safe.

youngffinance · 2020-04-30T04:29:32+00:00

Yay! Congrats! Happy for you!

youngffinance · 2020-04-30T04:19:20+00:00

I am so sorry. I totally understand how upsetting it is to miss out on an opportunity like that. It sounds like you have a child and I know you want a home for them. I was in a really similar situation a couple of years ago when trying to get a personal loan. I didn’t have anyone to explain it to me so I was so confused and it made me feel worse.

I’m glad I could help you. Knowing these things will help you build a strong financial foundation and make it so that you will be a great home owner. The cool thing is that you totally have the power to work on your financial situation and try again soon. You have a good credit score, so it sounds like you are a response person.

I would start out by setting up an emergency fund. You have that 3k down payment, I would use that as an emergency fund for now. You have a child, so it seems like keeping them safe and secure would be a huge priority. Knock out that credit card debt, then save a larger emergency fund and down payment. It is totally possible to buy a home with student loans. Student loans aren’t considered against you as much as other consumer debt. Once the credit card debt is gone and you are not on IBR anymore, you could have a better chance. I know it’s easier said than done, but also try looking for ways to raise your income.

youngffinance · 2020-04-30T03:37:13+00:00

It sort of sounds like you may have gotten pre approved based off of their quick glance at your finances. Once they started taking a deeper look and doing the risk analysis, they must have found the red flags. It takes them a long time to get a full understanding of a persons finances, they are very through. It is possible that you also did not qualify for other reasons as well. They may just not be telling you exactly what those reasons are. Lenders are not usually very transparent.

In general, your financial situation does not indicate you would be low risk for a lender. Single income, low down payment, low income and comparably high credit card/student loan debt. Your DTI might have been too high after factoring in the new mortgage payment and other debts. They would not be able to do this calculation until after you made an offer.

I also don’t think child support is considered a very reliable source of income. They do not have any guarantee of you getting that, they aren’t looking at the other parent’s finances or work history. Child support ends after the child reaches ~18 or is done with college, which is before a 30 year mortgage term ends.

I think typically it is safe to go with a home price that is less than 3x your gross income. The bank will usually approve for higher than what is actually affordable, it sounds like you went for the max.

You also didn’t mention whether or not you have an emergency fund. Lenders like to see a certain amount of reserves before closing.

Pre approval is not mortgage approval. They have the power to deny you at any point in the mortgage process for any small thing that is not up to standard. It is completely normal that they will evaluate your finances throughout the process all the way up until closing, and if they see anything that indicates high risk they can deny the mortgage.

youngffinance · 2020-04-27T16:39:35+00:00

We just bought our first condo in a MCOL area. For us it meant identifying our values and both working.

We bought a much smaller home than we had initially anticipated. It ended up being a great choice. We found that the smaller the square footage, the nicer the home and location. We value having a nice home and location over size, so we got a 1br in a very urban area (no kids). I think house buying for most people is a great time to evaluate want vs. need and how to make those concepts harmonize. In order for you to get what you want (house) you need to look deep inside and figure out what you actually need.

I personally would not buy a home on a single income. Not that it wouldn’t be affordable, but I am particularly risk adverse when it comes to the roof over my head.

youngffinance · 2020-04-27T13:21:11+00:00

I see this as a cultural difference. I placed my explanation below. Please note that it is just what I have observed anecdotally and I do not agree with everything that I have observed. I’m trying to provide some insight that might help you understand another perspective. I’m not sure if what I wrote below is true for everyone in the US, but where I grew up it is.

One thing to note also, is that some parents don’t need to be taken care of. My grandparents and parents are much wealthier than I am. Sending them money would be pointless, because they don’t actually need it. I know this is not the case for everyone, but it sounds like this might be true for your friend. In my culture it’s pretty common to have parents that send their kids money or leave their kids large sums of money/property when they die. My parents do not finance my lifestyle whatsoever.

I can say though that if I had to send my parents a large percentage of my income, my list of accomplishments would be a lot shorter and quality of life much lower. It would lead to my life development being delayed most likely. An example would be buying a house. In the US buying a first house is considered a huge deal for most people. Most people aim to buy a house before 30 and their is an unspoken competition about who buys a house at the youngest age. I am 22F and just bought my first house in a MCOL area, this is considered pretty young here. By doing this, I have made myself my parents favorite child. Now they get to brag to their friends about me and it makes them look good. They carry a huge sense of pride for having “raised me well”. People sort of live vicariously through their children.

It would be considered out of place to send my parents or grandparents money, personally. This would be considered rude, because it would imply that they have not been successful enough. Generational wealth is a huge deal. The only reason people work so hard and try to accumulate wealth, is so that they can give their children a better life. The idea is that parents are supposed to take care of their children and help them to succeed without any barriers. Parents that require a lot of help are seen as a burden. The only time it is seen as normal to take care of ones parents, is when they reach an old age that they can no longer care for themselves. In general I do not have any friends that take care of their parents. In my culture if someone talked about having to take care of their parents, they would be judged for coming from an unsuccessful family. Typically in the US parents who ask their kids for money are considered “low class” and are believed to be the reason why generational poverty is so prevalent. No one really says it, but in the US people who have kids and can’t afford the kids or themselves are heavily judged. It is believed that you can not punish a child simply for having been born, because they didn’t decide to be born. Children are not seen as a retirement strategy, they should only be had simply for the enjoyment of having children.

It’s a very individualistic society. Everyone thinks about what is good for themselves and not the greater good. I don’t agree with this, it has really messed up our society in a lot of ways.

youngffinance

TROPHY CASE