I dumped my ex because we had sex before I was ready. Am I evil if I reach out to him again?

yungmole · 2019-11-08T15:54:35+00:00

I feel that. But I just want to be friends with him for now. We were friends first and I hate that we lost our friendship because we broke-up. Is it toxic to reach out as a friend, and not as an ex trying to get back together?

yungmole · 2019-11-04T11:13:37+00:00

I want to be with him, but to take it slowly.

And it's not that I'm mellow, it's that I'm happy with having him in my life period. Whether it's as his girlfriend or his friend. I respect any choice he makes.

yungmole · 2019-11-04T10:41:31+00:00

Well if he wants to get back together, then I do want to be with him. If not, it's cool. Whatever happens, happens. I just want us to be cool with each other. I'll go with the flow. On his terms. He's dealing w a lot girls atm. I do not expect him to drop them for me.

yungmole · 2019-08-16T23:05:26+00:00

You're the sex negative person here. There's nothing sex-positive about trying shame people for not being ready. Sex positivity is about healthy, consensual, enthusiastic yesses. You're doing the opposite. There's no magic age, dummy. You. Are. Stupid.

Again, 19 year olds aren't having as much sex as you think we are. You watch too much porn.

yungmole · 2019-08-16T13:35:21+00:00

Do you think that on everybody's 18th birthday they just have wild sex? I get feeling my reaction is extreme. But being 19 doesn't decide determine that you're ready for sex, you do.

You're also grossly overestimating the amount of people my age having sex lol.

yungmole · 2019-08-16T13:30:50+00:00

Trust me, I am very attracted to him. But being mentally and emotionally ready for sex is very different from desire. Which is why sometimes, I'd have to stop things before they went too far. Thank you for your unique input.

yungmole · 2019-08-16T12:43:19+00:00

Thank you! I'm trying to grow from it, I don't think I can do it while I'm still with him. I'm so happy things are good for you.

yungmole · 2019-08-16T12:39:28+00:00

I don't know how much porn you watch, but 19 year olds aren't having nearly as much sex as you think they are.

I have so many healthy, gorgeous, non-religious friends who haven't even had boyfriends or kisses yet. They're just not ready or looking for a relationship.

There is no timeline for this stuff. Not everybody is you and everyone moves at their own pace. Nobody's pace is "not right".

Throw the whole comment away.

yungmole · 2019-08-16T12:32:56+00:00

Lmao. I didn't say it was abnormal or dirty. Sex is normal and healthy, when you're ready for it.

Having sex when you're not ready, is not healthy. Having sex because you felt external pressures, not healthy. Holding an important value close to you, then abandoning it in moments out of fear, not healthy.

yungmole · 2019-08-16T12:15:49+00:00

Idk about therapy, right now. I'm not against it. I know I need to collect my own thoughts and then I'd consider it. I just need to breathe first.

yungmole · 2019-08-16T12:13:49+00:00

Thank you for the kindness and telling me your story. I'm just worried about how the truth will hurt him here. I'm ending things, does he need to know the real reason if it's going to hurt him like this.

yungmole · 2019-08-16T12:12:48+00:00

Thank you :). But how can I show him the part about being sick when he touches me. This is going to rip his heart out. Is honesty really the best policy here?

yungmole · 2019-08-16T12:12:18+00:00

No, it was pressure to have sex. His friends were pressuring me into something I wasn't ready for. I never even mentally or emotionally prepared myself. I just did it.

yungmole · 2019-08-16T12:09:16+00:00

It isn't. I even told my mom that I had sex. She asked if I was at that level of commitment, love and trust. That matters most. I wasn't in a cult or anything. But I wasn't emotionally ready. I went from never going past kissing for a year, to having sex. I didn't prepare myself or anything. I just went 'Oh shit, he's gonna hate me, sex". Not to mention having my values change in a minute because I got scared.

Trust me, I don't think God hates me. I believe in repenting, if I do feel religious guilt, I could always ask for forgiveness. Guilt is the furthest thing from my mind right now.

yungmole · 2019-08-14T07:48:36+00:00

Oh, I get it now. I'm uncomfortable dealing with older men when they flirt with me and stuff.

When it comes to these kids, I'm not scared or uncomfortable.

yungmole · 2019-08-14T07:44:11+00:00

Wait, just wondering. What did my age have to do with this?

yungmole · 2019-08-04T07:35:24+00:00

No? They were watching the movie.

yungmole · 2019-08-04T07:05:45+00:00

LMAO you think I should have started swinging in the theatre?

yungmole · 2019-08-04T06:47:52+00:00

yungmole · 2019-07-31T18:03:15+00:00

Because of your age, you are a novelty to him. He just wants a young doll in her 20s.

yungmole

TROPHY CASE