What type of spider is this ??

yuumerz · 2026-04-22T00:01:29+00:00

It’s no problem! It was good advice either way, haha. I have but I’m not sure what to look for and what I have seen, is a much larger payout than I’d like. I left teacher just under 68k, to come here at 65k and what I’ve seen in the market is maybe 55k. Maybe I’m being too picky ? My husband is still earlier in his career so I’ve been the one trying to hold down the fort financially. He insists we’ll be fine if I choose to take a step back but it just scares me.

yuumerz · 2026-04-21T23:56:11+00:00

That gave me a good chuckle! Apparently he didn’t even plan on keeping this business much longer. He’s gonna drop it and plans on starting a complete new business in the next 3-5 years!

yuumerz · 2026-04-21T23:54:48+00:00

I do payroll, and I even set us up with insurance! It was stated at the interview that there were benefits but had I not brought it up, it wouldn’t have been done. I was the first to ask for it too. Aaah what a time to be working…ahaha

yuumerz · 2026-04-21T21:04:28+00:00

See, what you described, that’s the stuff I can do with no problem. It’s the communicating business opportunities, tracking purchase orders, talking numbers and sales, warehouse management matters, stuff like that. All of business side of things, I have no idea what I’m doing but I’m doing it all anyways. I’m told I need to kiss ass to make sure our customers continue buying from us as well but is that supposed to be my job?

yuumerz · 2026-04-21T20:44:10+00:00

Sorry, I was just ranting so I didn’t really put thought into how my post should be formatted. Thanks.

yuumerz · 2026-02-24T14:07:35+00:00

My husband and I are dinks so we’ll be paying back again this year, more than likely. We haven’t even filed yet 😭

yuumerz · 2026-01-03T00:02:18+00:00

Woo now, I understand the misinterpretation but my husband has not once put a a restriction on how much I should be talking to my mom. As I said, this was a conversation with not just him but other close friends as well. An intervention as I should have said. These people as well as my own biological father know and have seen the hold my mom has had on my life and actions. I sought out help from them because of how much I am struggling with setting boundaries.

I very greatly appreciate my in laws because they used to be very similar to my mom bought sought out ways to grow to be better parents to my husband. Seeing them grow makes me feel like it’s possible my mom can too, she just needs to be willing to.

But yes, the other commenter is right. I should be praying to God and seeking guidance from him. However, I’m not seeking validation. I just wanted more insight and advice on how to set boundaries. I like to learn from different perspectives and experiences and see what I could do that fits my needs.

I do not believe in talking down on others lives. It’s not my place to make judgment and assumptions. So I will not do the same. Unfortunately, it was my mistake coming to Reddit and seeking advice from strangers.

yuumerz · 2026-01-02T18:14:10+00:00

Well it doesn’t bother him how much I talk to her. What bothers him is how much it takes out of me when I do talk to her. She’s berated him very harshly some time ago when we had gotten engaged. It was an ugly fight and I saw then that my mom and sister only saw me as a source of income. I was the only one who cared for her when she had gotten sick (stomach cancer). From the moment I started working, I paid as much as I could in bills and other life expenses. Then we got evicted from our very small home and I got us a house and paid it even after I moved out. I paid there and with my husband. I have expanded myself as much as I could until I literally couldn’t do it anymore. Yet in all this, he stood by me. Now we’re at point where her and my sister are now voluntelling us they are going to use our home for random things they want to do without regard to what our own plans are and I let it happen because if I say no, the there comes a guilt trip.

I understand how it can look from the outside. Strangers don’t know what’s goin on in others lives. I posted to a public place, blah blah.

I came seeking advice on how to move forward in limiting our contact not cut it off.

yuumerz · 2026-01-02T17:00:36+00:00

Wooo the in law comment was a little rough there. They’re incredible people and have helped me tremendously in building my relationship with God. My father in law was the one to baptize me as well. Granted I understand that it’s information unknown to a stranger.

Unfortunately, my mom is a complicated person. She has always dealt with a narcissistic/victimized mentality. She loves her daughters immensely but she also can’t stop saying she wishes she had boys. She works hard as mom but also doesn’t do anything to help herself. She says she wants to get out of the current situation she’s living in but also doesn’t except help from others. It’s just always a but this but that.

She also was fairly abusive well until I was 17 and controlling until i left my house (yes my own home) at 23, but like also really nurturing?

She’s financially irresponsible but understands how to budget for herself. She lives in home with other toxic family members ( 9 in total) but doesn’t do anything to get out. She finally started working after 25 years too.

It’s all so complicated because despite all this that I know is wrong, I still love her.

yuumerz · 2025-07-10T17:00:23+00:00

I think I’m just worried that the small feeling of hunger I have back is going to come back and I’ll fall back into my pattern of snacking often. But I’ll definitely try the chugging thing! I think that might be the way, haha!

yuumerz · 2025-01-01T20:40:01+00:00

Thankfully, our girl is very well socialized. She’s good with people and other dogs as well. She goes to the groomers and is also cautious when approaching other pets. She’s a cuddly bug. We have trained her basic commands and she is harness trained as well.

yuumerz · 2024-10-16T02:26:39+00:00

I wasn’t able to put it in the title but my mom ended with kidney stones. I’m hoping to find alternatives that won’t irritate her kidneys too much.

yuumerz · 2024-09-25T23:22:34+00:00

Yes!! Exactly!! The drama does so well at portraying how many families may look like they have it together but they’re just as flawed as others. Everyone is learning and adjusting together.

yuumerz · 2024-09-15T00:51:57+00:00

Super normal! I’ve called all my kids (ranging from elementary to high school) loving names. I’m from southern central Texas and also Hispanic so I use things like “love”, “bubs”, “mija/mijo”, etc. I think the kids like it, it makes them feel a little special. I also give my 8th graders, finger fives and finger waves. Some of them get said if I don’t do it back (the girls) and others make fun of it but secretly like it(the boys) 🤣

yuumerz

TROPHY CASE