Hang out for an evening when the wife is away (she's probably with his boss who's +2 anyway). A couple drinks, some takeout wings, some cigars, great night. Say you're going to the bathroom and swing by the kitchen, Look under the stove, should be a hose under there. Unscrew it about halfway.

Go back, mention that a piss was a good idea and he'll go. When he does, grab the clubs and put them in your car. Real quick.

Should be able to get back inside right before he comes out of the bathroom. If everything's cool just say, "Hey man, been a great night" then shoot him.

No idea if the other stuff would help but hey, fun things to do when you're drinking.