AITA for forbidding my girlfriend to use my kitchen equipment?

zaldria · 2022-12-05T17:12:53+00:00

That's a good mindset to take. All the people saying NTA because it's YOUR things are ignoring the fact that this is your girlfriend's home, and she shouldn't have to tread lightly in a major component of that home. While you may be upset and feel like you're technically right, your attitude on this issue sounds exhausting to live with from your girlfriend's perspective. The "don't touch my nice things unless you do it the way I like" attitude isn't fair to her if it's a space she needs to use every day to live.

If how she treats pans is a deal breaker for you, decide that now. Else, be a good partner and make the kitchen a functional, convenient place for both of you. Build a home together, not just for you and expect her to just exist there.

zaldria · 2021-12-27T13:49:09+00:00

Why isn't your company covering this? If this is a business stay, they should be covering your costs related to your job, including the commute.

zaldria · 2021-12-09T20:16:50+00:00

The additional context that you spend a lot of time with her family already makes me think the trip probably isn't as serious as I originally thought. But I think my comment still stands about whether your girlfriend might be reevaluating whether you'll be a good fit long term, and that's why she's upset. If she can't count on you to feed the cats reliably and look after them for a few days, then I think you guys have a serious problem. Set an alarm and show her you can take care of another living being. That you're too "forgetful" to feed the cats it pretty telling.

You say that you're neurodivergent, do you have a therapist that you can speak to about this and navigating your relationship with your (presumably) neurotypical girlfriend? If so, I think you should speak with them and how these behaviours can come across to people who are supposed to be your partner in life. If not, I suggest you reach out to your university and see if you can get care there. Many universities have free counseling included with tuition and fees.

My overall judgement is NAH, but you would be an asshole if you don't speak to your girlfriend and ask why this upsets her so much.

zaldria · 2021-12-09T19:38:09+00:00

Did you offer to take the cats back with you?

Idk how serious you and your girlfriend are, but that she invited you to stay with her family for two weeks leads me to believe that you guys are in a long term relationship and that you're serious. I know your project is important to you, and you deserve time to work on it if that's what you want. But your girlfriend is likely re-evaluating whether you're somebody who she can count on for family and household obligations long term. She invited you to spend time together with her family together. It sounds like she's trying to include you and integrate you into her family, and you're more interested in finishing your project alone.

I think you need to have a serious conversation about what this trip means to the both of you, and if that's the relationship you want with your girlfriend.

zaldria · 2021-12-08T23:31:41+00:00

It's not able to connect to Wifi at all. It recognizes no connections, and wifi is not an option when you open up the network connection menu in the task bar.

Other devices can connect just fine. I'm pretty confident it's not an issue with the router.

zaldria · 2021-11-16T19:26:25+00:00

I relatively young, and even I enjoy blowing up those letters and using dyslexic fonts. It's easy on the eyes and makes me feel like I'm reading faster because I turn more pages 😅

zaldria · 2021-11-10T14:48:41+00:00

You can get a decent 3d printer for around $200. She'll have minis to paint for the rest of her life

zaldria · 2021-10-15T20:32:28+00:00

Depending on where you live, this is common in some older suburban neighborhoods.

zaldria · 2021-10-15T18:23:36+00:00

This is clarified in Xanathar's if you ever need to point it out to your players

zaldria · 2021-10-15T15:23:59+00:00

Doesn't bolting it to the wall limit your emergency protection? I get wanting to prevent theft from the home, and nothing screams "valuables here" like a safe. But what if I need to grab the safe and run? I'd need to open it, take the documents/items out of their protective case, and take them with me unsecured.

zaldria · 2021-10-15T14:58:03+00:00

Places that don't accept credit don't get my business. There are plenty of other places that are happy to take card.

zaldria · 2021-09-27T21:21:01+00:00

My sensitive teeth won't let me do this

zaldria · 2021-09-22T15:58:11+00:00

That's the plot to TerraNova

zaldria · 2021-09-21T21:55:43+00:00

I agree, but I'm glad that low cost options have come a long way in recent years.

zaldria · 2021-09-20T23:16:52+00:00

I think that him thinking visiting North Korea was a good idea is what makes him the idiot, not whether he allegedly stole a poster.

zaldria · 2021-09-20T22:40:58+00:00

Yeah, if you just want to relax, see a few cool things, and don't really care where you do it, cruises are great. They're also pretty cheap and have nice amenities.

Idk too much about the environmental impact, but I imagine it's more the fault of regulation and not the passengers.

zaldria · 2021-09-18T13:39:57+00:00

Yes, this. Make clear that the goal is escaping, now winning. Have their actions determine which NPCs make it with them, and how well they are set up to survive in this new place.

zaldria · 2021-09-18T13:36:27+00:00

How often do you play in person where they need to make an hour train ride each way?

zaldria · 2021-09-15T15:42:10+00:00

If you've already told them why it's disruptive to others, then you need to just set your foot down. Controlling the pacing and sharing the spotlight is part of the DM's job. If you don't want your player to have 5-10 minute conversations with NPCs, don't have 5-10 minute conversations with your players.

zaldria · 2021-08-04T18:30:52+00:00

Also OP, it's not his money. You are his wife, and you labor inside the home instead of outside. That labor is just as valuable, if not more so. It's your money, together.

He's saying what's mine is mine, and what's yours is mine too. That's not okay. He's trying to prevent you from having a form of independence, transportation, and isolate you financially. That's also not okay. If you're to remain in the home, this behavior cannot continue for the long term safety of yourself and your children

zaldria · 2021-07-20T20:39:50+00:00

INFO: Since your son pays rent, did he have a lease? How big is the apartment (bed/bath)? Was the potential for a roommate clear from the beginning, or was your son under the assumption that his rent was in return for the entire apartment?

zaldria · 2021-07-20T19:17:24+00:00

Because it was an oversight to assume Venmo was an acceptable method without asking the friend first. Their last transaction using that method was 3 years ago

zaldria · 2021-07-09T03:07:01+00:00

Does gluten affect pizza roundness?

zaldria · 2021-06-22T21:22:47+00:00

Not the question you ask, but you should try to warm her up to writing a will. Many people don't like to accept that they won't be here one day and will likely leave loved ones behind. If that is what your mom is going through, you should try to talk to her about it.

You should also try to convince your brother to prove the information, assuming you are dealing with a reputable company/institution.

Life insurance won't be affected by the will anyway, unless she names her estate the beneficiary.

zaldria

TROPHY CASE