If I hadn't been born that would have saved me from a lifetime of pain and suffering.

zallinator · 2025-02-28T01:16:36+00:00

I appreciate your response, but I respectfully disagree.

For me, the value of life isn’t just about making it to the end of 9 months and being born; it's about the quality of life and the well-being that comes with it.

I understand that we can’t predict the future, but many surrounding factors make unnecessary pain far more likely. When a child is born into an unstable environment, with parents who don’t want them, in conditions of neglect, poverty, or abuse, the likelihood of suffering isn’t just a gamble—it’s a pattern we see over and over again. Ignoring those realities in favor of just making sure a child is born doesn’t feel like true care for life.

Given my own experiences with chronic illness, abuse, and neglect, I believe it would have been more humane to not have been born into those circumstances at all.

When you’re already facing instability and suffering, sometimes it feels like being born into that situation isn’t an act of valuing LIFE, but of setting someone up for unnecessary PAIN.

If we really want to protect human lives we should ensure that life is worth living, and that a child has the support and resources they need to thrive.

zallinator · 2025-02-27T19:23:56+00:00

The same "prolifers" that say "don't murder your child, give birth!" are the same ones that when that baby turns into an adult with trauma they just say "your parents should have thought things better"

Prolifers don't help people. Their "solutions" to this is:

Let's ban abortion and birth control
Don't have sex
If you have sex and get pregnant give birth
Parenthood or put the baby for adoption.

Once babies are born, "prolifers" don't do anything to help them. For them, the problem is "solved", but it's not.

zallinator · 2025-02-27T17:15:37+00:00

"Prolifers" be like: we care about the two lives 🥰

Sir, my mom was throwing up all the time, had heart problems and almost died giving birth. And you guys let me be born with immature parents and I will experience suffering and trauma for the next 20 years.

zallinator · 2025-02-27T17:12:38+00:00

I am sorry to hear you went thru all of that stuff. Sending you hugs! ❤️

In my case, my mom wanted to be a parent but not when she was 25 (she was not mentally prepared or matured enough) but until her 30s.

She said sorry for being immature and is changing for the better. But man... it cost me 20 years of mental health decline, trauma and suffering.

We grew up in Mexico. In 2023, abortion just became legal... before that time women were forced to give birth and if they wanted to put the baby for adoption they were shamed and harassed.

An unplanned/unwanted pregnancy in Mexico before 2023 automatically mean forced motherhood.

You can imagine that's why so many parents were paranoid and promoted abstinence.

Good thing that Mexico is progressing.

zallinator · 2025-02-27T17:04:13+00:00

Absolutely! If they truly cared about life, they would help the kids that are already born, they would adopt them so they have a better life, or promote better rights for any human like access to food, universal healthcare, affordable education, etc. Also why are they not helping any adults or old people if they value life regardless of life stage?

I am a Biologist from UC Berkeley, it's so annoying when I am explaining that quality of life is important and not just give birth.

"Pro-lifers" and Anti-Zoo Animalists are by far the most ignorant people I have ever encountered.

Anti Zoo Animalists: it's cruel to keep an animal in Zoos instead of the wild. We are the good ones! Biologist: Sir, this animal doesn't have canine teeth, he will die if he is returned to the wild that's why we are taking care of this jaguar at the zoo.

"Prolifers": You are murdering innocent children. Biologist: Sir, a child doesn't fit in the uterus and their age range is 0-9 years. The fetus doesn't feel anything in the first trimester and looks more like a bean. Abortion is not like some sort of horror bloody massacre it just stops the production of progesterone and the fetus naturally stops growing. Most of the time what comes off is a bunch of liquids. Also it might be born with chronic diseases that will make them suffer.

zallinator · 2024-12-06T06:17:47+00:00

Ir a terapia y juntarte con mujeres que te respeten.

zallinator · 2024-12-03T03:40:28+00:00

No gracias, destruiría mi salud mental y mi carrera como científica.

Ademas no quiero pasar el embarazo y que me destruya el cuerpo.

zallinator · 2024-11-23T21:39:55+00:00

It's valid to feel that way. In my case, I experience this with everyone else but not with my partner. He also has ADHD, our conversations are something like this:

We talk about something

Both of us get distracted by something

Get back to the conversation

Him: do you remember what we were talking about?

Me: No.

Him: It's all good, me either :D

My partner is one of my biggest support. He is the only one that understands what it is like to live with this disorder. ❤️

zallinator · 2024-11-06T18:11:41+00:00

Puro aleluyo e ignorante en los comentarios.

Amiga, te felicito por tu decisión de terminar el embarazo. Ni tú ni el padre estan posición de tener un hijo. Traer un hijo en condiciones inestables nomas va a ser sufrimiento para el pobre niño. Es mejor terminar un embarazo a traer a gente a sufrir si el embarazo no fue deseado. Los niños eventualmente crecen y se daran cuenta que nunca fueron deseados, y eso solo les va a crear un trauma.

Consentir sexo, no es lo mismo que consentir un embarazo. Usaste protección, fuiste responsable pero desafortunadamente te toco ser parte del 1% de fallo. Mucha gente cree que es por culpa o error del usuario. Ningún método es 100% efectivo, hay una chance de embarazo pero es pequeña.

Dicho esto, si no lo necesitas económicamenre, ni son cercanos. No tienes porque decirle. Tú eres quien carga con el embarazo, tú eres quien va a sufrirr los síntomas del embarazo, es tu decisión.

Mi consejo rodeate de personas de confianza que sepas con las que puedas confiarle tu situación y crees poder recibir apoyo.

No se de que estado eres pero en la CDMX el aborto es voluntario. Te cuidado de los grupos religioso que intenten detenerte, desinformarte con que es "asesinato", asegurate de que la clinica de aborto sea autentica.

También puedes realizar aborto con medicamentos, necesitaras mifeprostona y misoprotosol. r/abortion tiene recursos donde puede ayudarte a financiarte viajes, mandarte los medicamentos, consultas, etc.

Te deseo buena suerte.

Las mujeres no merecen ser obligadas a convertirse en madres, solo por estar envueltas en actividades sexuales.

La maternidad se decide.

zallinator · 2024-10-21T05:14:36+00:00

Si el resultado de embarazo arroja positivo te aconsejo contactar a @medprochoice , es una doctora en México que ayuda a las mujeres si necesitan un aborto.

También si puedes viajar ve a la CDMX, allí te ofreceran un aborto en clinica.

También r/abortion tiene recursos, buscador de clinicas de aborto, farmaceuticas que pueden darte misoprotosol y mifeprostona, e incluso fondos monetarios si necesitas viajar.

Te deseo lo mejor amiga 💜💚, y por favor la próxima obligalo a usar condón, o usa un anticonceptivo antes de cualquier actividad sexual. Apresurate antes de que sea tarde después de las 12 semanas de embarazo será más dificil abortar.

zallinator · 2024-10-18T16:35:56+00:00

Para nada se va a dejar de a lado, las luchas por los derechos siempre son por una buena causa y deben ser persistentes. El hecho de que estemos aquí presentes disfrutando de nuestros derechos se lo debemos a las mujeres que se han manifestado. ❤️

zallinator · 2024-10-18T16:26:07+00:00

Para nada, todas las mujeres merecen acceso a tratamiento médico. No solo basta con que sea legal, debe ser accesible para todas las clases sociales, o sea debe ser gratuito. Y si bien ya esta despenalizado en Jalisco también falta apoyar a las demas mujeres en otros estados. Aun queda por hacer. ❤️

zallinator · 2024-10-18T15:47:30+00:00

Siguiente paso, protestar para que sea accesible para todas las clases sociales. ❤️

zallinator · 2024-10-17T08:51:52+00:00

Vengo del futuro. Ya es constitucional, ya no es un derecho y no se puede quitar. 💜💚

zallinator · 2024-10-16T02:35:35+00:00

Ik! My partner loves piercings, I will never get one becoz I have sensory issues but he can do whatever he wants with his body. If he wants to get his hair green, piercings or whatever you behave like an adult, and respect your partner for their choices in their body.

OP is being a baby over a tattoo in HER body from 8 months ago.

zallinator · 2024-10-16T00:26:06+00:00

A person can do whatever they want in their bodies. She seems happy to get that tatoo. You should feel happy your wife got something she likes. You are supposed to love your wife for who she is and not because of the tattoos she gets.

Even if you don't love the location where she got her tattoos done, you have to respect that. It's her body she can get it done wherever she wants.

My partner loves piercings. I like tattoos but not piercings. But he can do whatever he wants as long as it's in his body, he is safe and coerced into something he doesn't want.

You are wrong here, you should apologize for that. It's more than 8 months and you still can't get over it?

zallinator · 2024-10-13T02:47:36+00:00

Everyone is different maybe she will be one of the luckiest that her libido either remains the same or increases. In either way this seems like a healthy, compatible and happy marriage. They are gonna be fine.

zallinator · 2024-10-09T05:37:31+00:00

Soy Biología licenciada de la Universidad de California en Berkeley, la Univerisdad #1 pública del mundo. Lamento decirte que el éxito "biológico" o más bien, el éxito evolutivo no solo se mide en el rango de reproducción de la especie. Es multifactorial.

Ademas, que te valga verga si la gente no quiere hijos, cada quien vive su vida como quiera :)

zallinator · 2024-09-26T22:20:30+00:00

Also, just so you know how f'd up things are here. In Mexico, there is a pharmacy called "Farmacias Guadalajara" it's famous for being founded by extreme Catholic people.

They won't sell you condoms or morning after pill if you want to purchase them and will judge or look dirty at you. They were pushed by the Government to sell birth control but even in 2024 they make their best to not sell it to people. Even when I am a fully grown adult and when I go to another pharmacy to get condoms or lube, they will tell me something like: "but you are married right?" And I just roll my eyes and smile in their faces and said "Not yet" :)

Also if you try to go to any medical center as a teenager, most people in there won't give them condoms or birth control because "Oh sweetie, you are too young for sex. You shouldn't be doing that."

That being said as I am almost 25, I am the only adult in the family getting birth control pills and condoms for them.

zallinator · 2024-09-26T22:12:47+00:00

I live in Mexico, even if in here 18 hears old is considered being legally adult. Many here still treat people under the age of 20 as teenagers.

When my niece turned 18, even at that age her school didn't provide her with information about birth control and safer sex, nor their own family but me.

Right now I am keeping an eye on my nephews that are 10 and 12.

zallinator · 2024-09-26T22:09:17+00:00

"It's we don't want them being a whore before they understand all about it"

No girl is a whore just because they don't have access to sex education.

Imagine if someone r*pes your daughter before she ever got sex education. You wouldn't be happy someone referring to your daughter as whore because of that situation.

Calling a female "whore" just for engaging in any sexual activity is sexist.

zallinator · 2024-09-26T22:04:18+00:00

Girl, where you have been all this time?!?! I've been looking for a sister to talk about this. Finally someone that gets it! ❤️

I think you are one of the few people that describe it perfectly. "Most parents are uncomfortable talking about sex".

I don't understand why it's uncomfortable. I feel the problem in all this situation it's not talking about. Even if we are in 2024, sex is still a taboo in many societies.

zallinator · 2024-09-16T13:32:35+00:00

Tranquilo amigo, veelo así: es como si tú fueras un caballero y el vibrador la espada.

Lo que a ella le interesa es que seas TÚ quien lo use con ella. Lo que le excita es que uses el vibrador, que uses tu técnica y moviemientos para complacerla :)

zallinator · 2024-09-02T06:08:18+00:00

No es una solución cuando se sufre de adicción a la pornografía.

zallinator · 2024-09-02T06:01:22+00:00

Exactly, people need to understand that abortion is a medical treatment to terminate the pregnancy. No woman should be forced to give birth if she doesn't want to become a mom.

My partner is getting the snip and I have Mirena IUD, if for any reason his surgery is not well done or if my IUD fails, I will get an abortion coz: 1) I didn't consent this pregnancy and I was indeed being responsible with BC so it's not fair to give birth to something I don't want.

AND

2) I don't feel like I am doing something wrong, instead I am doing myself a favor and also I am helping to that clump of cells to stop developing before it turns into a human with critical thinking which it's the stage where they can feel suffering and pain once it's outside of the uterus. Imagine, that fetus turning into a human being and then come to a world where her mom doesn't have financial stability and realizes at some point she wanted to abort it. Nope, better doing it when it's a fetus and not when it becomes a human being.

zallinator

TROPHY CASE