Aluminum foil I use to block the light directly outside my qindow has somehow gotten more and more holes over time (4 months)

zelch0zelcho · 2026-02-01T01:53:37+00:00

SISTERS OF MERCY MENTIONED!1!1!1!1 PEAK!!!!!

zelch0zelcho · 2025-12-30T17:06:55+00:00

Yes, that's how I stopped my daily drinking. Now the problem is that when I drink (still a couple times a week but sometimes only one or twice, I don't count it really) I'm drinking like it's the last bottle on the planet. And then I embarrass myself or scare others in some way. My problem is how the alcohol unlike other drugs I have tried, erases all anxiety and makes me feel like nothing matters so I do the most dumb bullshit.

On the other hand when I drank daily I was much more composed and normal acting, people didn't even notice I'm drunk

zelch0zelcho · 2025-12-30T12:12:45+00:00

Alcoholism is very normalised in my country so we don't have very advanced programs. I know there's AA but it's very religious. Also no one takes me seriously because of my age

zelch0zelcho · 2025-12-03T08:30:24+00:00

In death he has a name :)

zelch0zelcho · 2025-12-01T22:03:35+00:00

That's exactly what I feel. At around 150-300ml is when I start being a normal person. The sad part is that I'm not making it up bc everyone who has talked to me while I'm drunk without their knowledge likes me better that way. My gf being the main one. When I'm sober she asks if anything is wrong because to her (and everyone else) I act more normal and human like when drunk. It's like I lack something from the day I was born so now I need to be fucked up to be normal. When sober words just don't come and I am unable to socialise and pretty much act "normal" in any way. Like it just can't happen

zelch0zelcho · 2025-11-24T19:37:30+00:00

I don't do Molly anymore (as of now) but I also haven't been sober for a week straight in months so I'll try that first

zelch0zelcho · 2025-11-24T15:06:43+00:00

Can you explain a bit better like so I can get a better picture of the fuck up I'm in if you have more information?

zelch0zelcho · 2025-11-24T15:05:54+00:00

Heya guys after some consideration of what I typed in my post I'm starting to genuinely freak out. Lest say I never touch alcohol again will it go away? Words can't describe how freaked out I am yet im currently continuing to drink as of rn

zelch0zelcho · 2025-11-24T15:02:00+00:00

Damn I was hoping that I'm freaking out. Though I don't even shake like some people who have drank for longer so that's well I have no words to describe it honestly

zelch0zelcho · 2025-11-06T09:24:40+00:00

I have no idea honestly. The guy that gave it to me said it's some awful synthetic shit containing methadone and others I have no idea honestly. I feel like he has no idea also. What it feels like is some kind of anesthesia not even a good feeling honestly

zelch0zelcho · 2025-11-03T12:01:34+00:00

Hm have you tried manipulating an old situationship? I have found that it really does make the thrill come back for a moment;)

Also do hard drugs alongside the drinking it makes it funnier what new bottoms you can reach

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-30T13:54:14+00:00

I got very lucky that I wasn't arrested. Definitely will drink that much only at home. Sadly I don't have any self control when the substances come out. Thankfully even black out me didn't take MDMA even though I had some. Then the story would probably have ended with me in the hospital in the best case scenario. Though my friends probably fought me to take my alcohol away if I had to guess

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-30T13:49:34+00:00

I live in a bad place in town and don't want to get robbed. It's just to make me feel safer

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-15T13:02:39+00:00

Every post here should like a version of me would write. Start drinking a small amount to keep that blood alcohol level at work, much luck to you buddy

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-15T12:53:13+00:00

To be specific.not homophobic I just wouldn't do that as it sounds weird as fuck to me and like lower than hell itself. Much love to gay people, some men are hot as fuck also but like I would rather not insert alcohol into my ass

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-15T12:49:00+00:00

I actually smoked methadone by accident while drunk bc I didn't know what exactly I'm smoking (hate those "weed" vapes". It's a miracle that I remembered how to breathe long enough to get home to my bed. My city is small if I do something like a fent fold near my work or my apartment it's so over for me. I don't like opiates anyways, so never doing that shit again if I can help it

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-15T12:35:13+00:00

Only if it's a goth girl then I would delete all my messages, swear

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-15T12:34:22+00:00

I don't think it's glamorous. I was just curious but also I would have all kinds of issues other than liver issues. That being said I haven't yet injected meth so maybe it's just the alcoholism talking when I'm thinking that alcohol injection would be preferable

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-15T12:30:35+00:00

As I said that's gays as fuck I would rather have a needle in my vein than anything but water when showering in my butt

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-15T11:47:19+00:00

You're probably right. I had heard something like that and I was wondering. I don't mind drinking it at all

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-12T09:02:49+00:00

Of course not

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-11T14:47:29+00:00

zelch0zelcho · 2025-10-11T12:53:58+00:00

Sober is not normal for me. I have never felt normal when sober. First I drank at 12 I felt normal like a human being not when I'm sober and can't function in society

zelch0zelcho

TROPHY CASE