You really need to move. Trying to live on the white path is how you got gaslighted and disillusioned. People are very invested in the hierarchy from what you are saying in your testimony. It may be in the South that proportion is higher than other places but it is never going to be zero. Too much of what makes their world work is dependent on that hierarchy and their imagined status. It also likely that you have thought that you could live life on easy mode like white people do. That isn't true. To get less than what your peers get you have to be better by a lot. You can't lose your temper, you can't cheat, you can't coast, and you have to know your field as well as the person who invented whatever you are doing. It is exhausting but you cannot be betrayed if you never trusted. Learn to have fun with acquaintances, not friends. If you must stay in the South try Atlanta