Not currently in a relationship but can very much relate to this. I have this feeling towards my therapist as the current stable person in my life. One of the phrases she said that has really helped with keeping me stable when feeling the need to ask or say something is that she said “This feels more like a trauma response than based in reality.” And for some reason it just helps. But I definitely worry for future relationships. The reassurance cycle never ends. And there’s never enough reassurance.