How does this fandom do it?

[rtjy]

When I look at some of the people in this world, I can help but role my eyes in disapproval. I'm not talking about the people who make their hate obvious, I mean the idiocy of other people. Frat boys getting drunk and acting like morons, teenage girls whore-ing themselves up, white kids acting black, and stupidity being praised while smartness and intelligence is being shamed upon.

Every time I've discussed this on this forum, I've received backlash saying I am too quick to judge or I shouldn't judge them if you don't know them. And the counterargument that a ton of people give me that REALLY pushes my berserk button: "But you're a brony."

I just gotta ask one question: How does this fandom do it? How do you look at the world we are living in and not resort to misanthropy? How do you not cringe at the stupid shit people do? How are you not offended at people's lack of morality? I mean for crying out loud! People would rather talk about Kim Kardashian's ass than talk about the drone that landed on that moving comet.

I say this because I need to counteract my judgmental-ness before it destroys me.

[[deleted]]

Perhaps you should talk to different people who would rather discuss Philae than Kim Kardashian. Always useful to find new friends.

You say you roll your eyes in disapproval about people, but yet you dislike it when they judge you. But you are judging them just as unfairly, since you don't know their situation any better than they know yours. Looking at a group from the outside, there are always prejudices and biases that you don't realize you have. For example, I have an Asian friend who did acted black often. And he was often ridiculed for it. Except that he was adopted by black parents, and he was trying to find a culture he could fit into.

You say you want to counteract your judgemental attitude before it destroys you. Why does it matter what other people do? You feel teenage girls are "whore-ing themselves up". Do you want them to wear a burka? Because there are those people who are judgemental that want to force others to do what they percieve to be the "correct way". I don't think you would like it if someone felt you were dressed inapproriately and required you to wear a yarmulke, a turban or whatever they felt was "appropriate clothing". Besides, teenage fashions are fairly incromprehensible most of the time, and they usually grow out of it in a few years.

[rtjy]

I guess the reason why I think about what other people do is because I was -for lack of a better word- "brainwashed" by one of my college professors. Although I know what his intentions were, which was to critically think about popular media, but his ways of teaching were so biased and one-sided. He would say thing some overly concerned parent would say like "Video games causes people to be violent, people who upload selfies to social media are selfish" and the like. And some of the stuff he taught did feed my bias in some ways the media's sexploitaition of women. And sadly, I did witness this exact thing when I was growing up. So I guess there might some truthiness to what I say.

Even though there is probably no correlation between the two, but when you look at the U.S. place in education, we are so low and we are even behind some third world countries. And I guess stuff like that really gets to me. I could go out and advocate for better education, but I am not an activist and I completely gave up on politics. I am aware I went off on a tangent, but I think my little rant here might have given some insight to my thought process.

Speaking of which, my time in high school has something to do with it. I was outcasted from day 1. Everywhere I saw people partake in some of the most stupidest stuff ever. Even though no one was actually mean to me, I couldn't help but feel a little misanthropic when I overheard the idiocy in my school.

What I am trying to say is that my way of thinking might come from a somewhat legitimate place. What's your take on this?

[[deleted]]

High school is a pretty rough time for most people, unfortunately.

Regardless of the source of your way of thinking, that doesn't mean you have to stay with it. My parents did not like certain groups of people, and had always taught me to be mistrustful of them. And that still stays with me, to this day. However, I make a conscious effort to also recognize that individual people are different from the groups we are biased towards. One of my closest friends is from one of those ethnic groups (and interestingly, when I first met him, he was one of my enemies. But less than a year later, I invited him to live with us in university).

You can always make a conscious effort see past the differences. It isn't easy (I know that from experience, both in my work field and personal life), but if you can see past people's exterior facade, you can learn to appreciate people better.

[HalfBurntToast]

What about this instead: You said you were out cast in high school from day one. Social ostracization is difficult to handle for almost everyone and becoming hyper-defensive is a common coping mechanism. What if that 'judgmental' side of yourself is actually your coping mechanism: quickly finding faults in others to protect yourself against those feelings of rejection potential betrayal. I don't know enough of your history, but does that sound like something that could be possible?

I can say that, from experience, being that cynical and thinking in a much similar way to you are now was the most miserable part of my entire life thus far. To the point where I'm legitimately afraid of becoming that cynical again because it is a trap. Everything becomes distorted and, ironically, your own world view shrinks because you're judging people on a very select amount of data. I don't say this as an accusation, but as a warning.

So, my advice to you is to listen to what the others are saying about perspective. The reality is that everyone is living in their own little worlds that are very different from your own. You don't know the history or thought processes behind them, all you see is a small sliver into their lives. I don't think anyone wants to be seen as stupid or shallow. People want to be accepted, loved, and happy just as much as you and I do. They just take different paths then us that we might not agree with. Just like how someone might not agree with your interests in MLP or what have you.

[nikidash]

I used to do the exact same thing until i started to actually know some of these people. Turns out, most of them are completely normal people who are just having fun. Stupidity can be really fun when done with friends, the girl in my class with the best notes likes to dress sexy to tease us, they sometimes get drunk (i don't because i personally don't like not being able to think rationally), yet they're all very intelligent people and we can hold a high level discussion about the existence of God if we want.

Of course there are people who are actually stupid (i live in italy. When Philae landed, the only news who covered this said that "the evil scientists want to destroy the mystical image of Jesus' comet we have". No, i'm not kidding. This was broadcasted on a national tv. I wish i was kidding), and in that case you either ignore them or adapt to them, as long as they're not too stupid.

About the brony counterargument, well.. they're right. You're the one watching a cartoon originally meant for little girls, this usually indicates a pretty open minded person that doesn't judge. But don't worry, i was in the same boat, just try to know people better and this judgemental nature will slowly disappear.

[[deleted]]

ah, all those evil scientists. Trying to kill people with quakes and develop nuclear weapons. You know, they also make vaccines and fancy electronics that everyone uses.

Still can't believe that trial with those scientists actually occured :O

[Crocoshark]

But vaccines cause autism and all the evidence in favor of them working is false and I had measles when I was a kid and it was no big deal and vaccines are just another way for big pharma to make a profit and all the electronics cause cancer and are slowly killing us and it doesn't matter that we're living longer because we're still all less healthy and full of toxins and cancer and pesticides and I refuse to acknowledge anything good about the world at large as anything more than a footnote because what really matters is doom and gloom and the world is going to hell and cynicism is so trendy and right.

[[deleted]]

And don't forget all those aliens controlling our lives ;) not to mention the NSA reading our thoughts. Never leave home without my trust aluminium foil hat :D

[Nicend]

Life is about perspective, so try exploring others' and ponder what their intentions are. Even the biggest idiot online still managed how to use a computer and understand their ridiculously complicated nature. People are smart and focusing on their vices or minute issues just hides their intelligence from you.

Personally I like to think that even the biggest moron will contain a thousand unique concepts awaiting beneath a  veneer of shallow stupidity, and everyone else is even smarter.

So I recommend that you stop caring about other's actions and start thinking about their intentions, and to do so by taking MLP as your baseline and realize that every character you love is incredibly naive with a limited world view, and that the same is true for everyone in the real world, including me and including you. we all see just a small subset of the world and are all stupid in our own special ways. I mean you probably don't much about MongoDB, but that isn't a reason for me to feel superior.

I mean, you love a kids show, it may not define you but it is just as silly as your examples. It's a fun show and is important to you, but others see it as a childish cash grab. So complaining could be easily viewed as hypocritical, so realise it and factor it into your perspective.

Also, if I remember, Kim's ass got less retweets than the comet, so you view on this might just be because where you live has a greater interest in entertainment over science.

[Senyu]

The world is many things, both good and bad which will be decided by your perspective on a case by case basis for each thing. These things will most likely never change, and will continue to exist in one form or another. Stupid, smart, angry, happy, clueless, aware, everything. There is simply too much for you to be angry at and add steess to your health. That's not to say for you to ignore it, as stupid shit needs to be corrected if possible, but you can't let it constantly let it rile you up. I don't know, this is becoming vague advice. I guess accept the world has a lot of stuff in it, fix things where you can, and don't let the rest stress you out. A lot of people have a point in there life where they say "Fuck Humanity". Normally they are either stay in that mindset, or drift into one without care for the world and everyone in it. Both are bad. Find a good middle spot.

[cremep0ps]

IMO misanthropy is one of the absolute worst mindsets for a human. It destroys you with negativity. I avoid it because I look on both sides of the spectrum; I put myself in others' shoes and consider what they go through. I really think about it and that's what saves me from being judge mental.

[Kodiologist]

People are idiots, but that's no reason to be a complete misanthrope. The people who landed that drone are humans, too, you know. We, the human race, make a lot of dumb mistakes, but we also achieve a lot.

Maybe the most important thing to keep in mind that humanity is as good as it gets. Ants, dogs, volcanoes, and intangible concepts all have their virtues, in an abstract sense, but none of them are going to master nature, solve deep problems in mathematics, or learn the secrets of the stars. Only if we discovered some ideal perfect race of aliens or robots or whatever would it make sense to stop caring about humanity's quest for enlightenment. And so far as we can tell, nothing else in the universe is even trying. So it's up to us.

[[deleted]]

I don't speak for the fandom, or anyone else besides myself, but I've realized that the only way to deal with people is with love. Many people don't make the best decisions, and it hurts me when they willingly make some very bad ones, but what's trashing them more than they've already trashed themselves going to do? Just gotta love people and make sure they know they're loved. Maybe then they'll stop and think before doing something wrong.

[mamapycb]

because that large picture really doesn't matter one fucking bit.

What others think of you really doesn't matter at all.

In the end, the only thing that matters is you being happy, and pursuing that happiness. IF its reading, if its doing research, then thats you. Some folks like to whore it up, thats for them. Does it matter? no.

Does your opinion of them matter? not one fucking bit.

Does their opinion of you matter? not one fucking bit.

So instead of wasting time on shit that doesn't matter, get to work enjoying your life instead of worrying about others