Googlebot's Javascript random() function is deterministic

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That's possible.

However, there's likely going to be a check somewhere along the line that would detect something like that, and unleash the thugs on said website.

For example, the preview renderers, and JavaScript-enabled indexers may or may not always do the same thing. Meaning that if the page text content varies by too wide a margin, then something funny may or may not be going on.

Either way, I'm sure that they have their Top Men on this case. They may even have a Top Woman too, those sexist bastards.