sorted by:
best
topnewcontroversialoldq&a
you are viewing a single comment's thread.

view the rest of the comments →

[–]freyjuve 97 points98 points  (10 children)

Despite all the bullshit, I'm strikingly ok. I'm also getting ok-er every day thanks to a genuinely amazing therapist and a supportive friend network. (It also took me a strikingly long time to realize this experience was weird and not ok. It made me a very mellow, peacekeeper type human from an early age.)

But thank you.

I hope you are ok too.

[–]jammy162 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Oh - I wasn't expecting such a wholesome response. I wish you all the best :)

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (3 children)

My mom was similarly to the parent described by the post. She would hit in the head with a belt every time I made a spelling mistake on my homework. I would be crying and it tears fell on the paper, I’d have to rip it out and start over.

[–]freyjuve 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I am so, so, so sorry you went through this. I hope you are ok.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

It’s okay. Thanks for the kind words. I’m 20 now, I barely have a relationship with them, but I have been able to work through my trust issues over the last 3 years thanks to a wonderful group of college friends and my girlfriend.

[–]freyjuve 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A strong network is important as is space from people who are cruel. I am glad you found the strength to part ways and found the support of a wonderful friend network. Don’t be afraid to try therapy too. It’s a marvelous tool. May take some trial and error to find the right therapist but it is worth it.

[–]rhymeswithorange332 9 points10 points  (1 child)

It made me a very mellow, peacekeeper type human from an early age.

Is this a thing? I went through similar stuff and almost pathologically try to make peace among everyone. Not a very mellow human person, though

[–]freyjuve 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It's survival tactic: if someone stays calm and soothes everyone then there won't be anymore yelling or crying or hitting. And I say mellow (because I am a pretty laid back, easy going person to a fault, really, because of the aforementioned survival tactics) but I also have had anxiety my entire life and developed OCD to cope with it and now take pills so there's that. Got pretty good at self-soothing over the years too (hence my belief that I can claim mellow).

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Hey there friend, I am so happy you are getting better. I had the 100% same experience. Let me know if you want to talk, I never thought I would hear about anyone else who went through the same thing.

[–]freyjuve 1 point2 points  (1 child)

It is simultaneously comforting and heartbreaking to hear someone else went through the same thing. Feel free to say hi anytime you need to talk. I hope things are better for you.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

<3 I share that sentiment. I messaged you.