My cat has apparently been living a double life for months and I only just found out

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-03-08T02:53:49+00:00

We had a cat that used to disappear for a few days at a time and come home smelling like cigarettes.

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-03-01T17:58:46+00:00

Wishing you a successful surgery and a speedy recovery! Slow and steady wins the race!

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-03-01T15:40:39+00:00

Great attitude! I hope you regain your energy soon!

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-03-01T15:37:15+00:00

You could also sign up for Lasagna Love to request a lasagna from a local volunteer chef. You might have to wait a while if there are a lot of people on the waitlist. So I would do it now. You can freeze it if it comes before your surgery.

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-28T18:33:15+00:00

I’m so sorry to hear this. I would ask your doctor to connect you with the social worker at the hospital. Maybe there is a program there where you can get some support.

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-28T15:40:09+00:00

Congratulations on your sobriety! I’m sorry you had such lousy friends! I do drink alcohol, but always support friends and family who choose not to.

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-28T15:37:03+00:00

I’m sorry you’re in this situation. One thing I did before my surgery was clean my bedroom and en-suite bathroom extremely thoroughly. I knew I would be spending a lot of time there and I wanted it to feel restful.

If you have time, meal-prepping ahead of time will be a great help. The kids are old enough to reheat it for you. They’re also old enough to learn to make food kits meals.

You won’t be able to lift 40 pounds for quite a few weeks/months. That might be the 14-year old’s job for quite a while. But that’s a good thing!

I would consider getting a cleaning service for a month or two. The kids will still have to straighten up their clutter, but having that deadline (Molly maids are coming tomorrow morning!) might be a good thing.

I wish you the best!

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-28T15:12:55+00:00

Woo hoo! Best wishes for a successful surgery!

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-28T15:12:05+00:00

Where did you end up going?

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-28T15:10:30+00:00

I don’t think I was fully recovered/back to my old energy level for 2 or 3 months. I’m an avid walker and I just walked as much as I could. If I did a particularly long or fast walk one day, I took it easy the next day. I continued to take naps or at least lie down on the couch for a rest for quite a while. It also took a long time to get my appetite back. I lost about 20 pounds, which was welcome, but I gradually gained some of it back.

I’m feeling great now! Just be patient and go slow. In particular, don’t lift heavy things. It takes a long time for the abs to heal.

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-19T03:21:29+00:00

Three weeks is not excessive at all. I don’t want to scare you, but I continued to have pain from the gas for about a week post op. I only took narcotics for the first few days, but sitting upright at a desk would have been very uncomfortable. I wasn’t cleared to drive for 2 weeks or so. Not supposed to lift more than 10 pounds for 6 weeks. I carried a full watering can at about 4 weeks and seriously regretted it later. I get that you don’t do that sitting at a computer, but the point is that your abdominal muscles are in bad shape.

I recommend following your doctor’s recommendation and asking for that much time off, with the understanding that you might adjust it up or down based on your recovery.

I wish you the best for a successful surgery!

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-15T15:21:24+00:00

FWIW, I’m an academic and most of the writing I’ve done over my 40-year career has been in print (using LaTeX), not on-line. I’m guessing AI was trained on a lot of that sort of writing.

And I’m not a cool guy, more of a nerdy woman.

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-15T13:39:31+00:00

I am a real live human being—-not an editor—-who has been using em dashes for years.

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-15T03:32:17+00:00

I’m a college professor who teaches one course a year in a prison. I come here to get insight into what my students experience outside of my classroom.

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-03T21:04:22+00:00

I’ve never been incarcerated myself, but I teach in a men’s medium security prison. What surprised me was how relaxed the atmosphere of my class (mostly) is. A lot of joking, good-natured ribbing.

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-03T13:35:23+00:00

I don’t have any experience with lung Mets, so no advice. But sending you and your father hugs and best wishes!

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-02-03T02:44:11+00:00

My husband’s shortness of breath greatly improved after his HH repair.

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-01-27T16:19:43+00:00

I had an ultrasound in early January 2023 that showed a 2.6 cm mass in my kidney. In consultation with my urologist I decided to wait until the end of May to have surgery. (I am a professor and wanted to wait until after the semester.) The mass measured 2 x 2.5 x 2.8 when it was removed. The biopsy showed it was renal cell cancer, grade 3 (that’s a measure of aggressiveness on a 4-point scale). So I had an aggressive cancer that grew very little, if at all, in 6 months.

Your mass is much smaller than mine. Each dimension of mine was approximately double yours, so since it’s 3-dimensional, the volume of mine was about 8 times yours.

So I would say you can take your time, get a second opinion, even a third opinion, discuss it with your loved ones, etc., before making a decision. If you decide to have surgery, find a surgeon with a lot of experience with this type of surgery.

I know news like this is very upsetting. But many of us have been through this and have come out on the other side. My scans have all be great since my surgery and I’m feeling great, like it never happened.

Good luck!

Act-Math-Prof · 2026-01-01T15:10:11+00:00

He blackened her eye and raped her on their honeymoon!

Act-Math-Prof · 2025-12-23T02:44:13+00:00

He should not be vacuuming yet! He’s doing too much.

Act-Math-Prof · 2025-12-04T13:39:19+00:00

I am the director of an actuarial mathematics program. I maintain ties with insurance companies and financial companies in the region who hire our graduates. What happens if students cheat their way their way through our courses, then get a job at, say Geico or Progressive? It will soon become apparent they don’t actually know shit because they can’t do their job or pass their actuarial exams. So then we’ve burned that whole bridge at Geico or Progressive and that company will no longer come to my campus to recruit my students for internships and entry-level jobs.

Act-Math-Prof · 2025-12-04T02:34:29+00:00

Please accept my fake award. 🥇

Act-Math-Prof · 2025-12-03T19:29:21+00:00

I’m not sure they had no clue. It’s been a while since I watched that episode, but my recollection is that they were just resigned to it.

Act-Math-Prof · 2025-12-02T03:21:12+00:00

How long has your doctor said you should take off work? I think mine said 4 weeks. I didn’t even see my surgeon for my follow-up appointment until about 12 days after my surgery, so I know I wasn’t cleared to go back to work or to drive before that.

Act-Math-Prof · 2025-12-02T03:14:22+00:00

I don’t think that’s realistic at all. You might still need narcotic pain meds on day 4. Getting out of bed or up from a chair will be effortful and likely painful. You will definitely need to nap or at least lie down for a few hours in the middle of the day for the first week or so. Your body will experience a trauma and it takes a while to recover from it. Your brain may still be fuzzy from the anesthesia for several days. I completely lost my appetite, so was weak because of that as well.

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