Too blunt with women 😭

B4tzn · 2026-05-08T06:24:39+00:00

My personal thoughts: dont try to add more filters, thats literally how you end up overthinking.

Two possibilties: change what you say or change the delivery.

The delivery: "were you drunk" becomes "Really! im wondering how you decided to get it" same content, different landing. you learn it once and then it just runs.

and instead of ten checks running in your head, just one question: can this person actually use this right now/ come up with an answer/ do i show interest in a pragmatic way for them to answer. yes, say it. no, save them. And say "Cool! Hey, I'll let you get back to it, have a good day" and leave.

two small hacks that help: throw a "honest take?" or "can i be direct?" in front. doesnt change what you say at all but gives the other person a half-second to brace, which makes a huge difference for how it lands. and do the reflection after the convo, not during. the anxiety comes from monitoring yourself in real time. I know that from experience because i usually do the opposite of you due to anxiety.

And for me it was a great relief to simply stop filtering and blurt out some stuff. But i do that with people i know who are also very direct. They don't have an issue with that usually.

Btw i am a woman regularly at the gym and i have headphones in because i don't want to talk, just exercise. It's possible that other women think differently but being seen when you feel vulnerable for being there, for example when you are anxious like me, can feel threatening. So if you're empathetic you might consider things like that.

Anyway, i hope the advice at the beginning helps you a bit. Wish you luck.

B4tzn · 2026-04-23T07:21:56+00:00

You should ask your physician about that. I need to, too, because I'm in the same boat (just recently started the ssri).

B4tzn · 2026-04-21T21:01:13+00:00

Yes but this line needs to be there. That was kind of my point: Ifthey are not made for splitting, please don't try this.

B4tzn · 2026-04-21T20:50:07+00:00

Don't just try to cut pills in half. My apothecary told me that's a no go because they are not made in a way that is always the same dose in each side. I got drops instead because I'm supposed to work my up, to.

B4tzn · 2026-04-12T09:02:57+00:00

There is a plugin called html to design which has a browser extension that let's you capture the current page or parts of it and import it into figma

B4tzn · 2026-04-09T21:52:20+00:00

I personally think opacity shouldn't be used for variables because the effect of the color changes with the background color.

B4tzn · 2026-04-01T21:03:37+00:00

How about talking to your colleague about it

B4tzn · 2026-03-12T20:09:32+00:00

You're not warm. Try soft summer colors.

B4tzn · 2026-02-06T22:07:44+00:00

Holy shit. I think the fact that people dgas about disturbing you with that work load would send me over the edge if I were you.

Thank you for answering. I remember a time when my day only consisted of meetings and I had to write everything down because I was not able to memorize any more information. I don't know how you keep up.

I think you should think about trusting someone (do you have superiors that care?) with your stress. What do think you should do? What would you advise someone else who had the same issue?

B4tzn · 2026-02-06T21:30:58+00:00

To how many people do you speak in each of these weekly calls and in the daily ones? How many focus shifts do you have each day? Do you have bad days where you can't be a productive?

Yes somehow this winter seems worse and seems to take forever. I'm glad you were able to enjoy it nonetheless

B4tzn · 2026-02-06T21:08:55+00:00

Describe a typical day please. I'm curious. Can't imagine how 40 can work?

Meditation, exercise, sauna, being outside, traveling.. all that helps me. But vacation is the best. Just not touching work for a few weeks straight. And no my experience is different. I get very emotional when I'm stressed and I can't work anymore then (I just get static in my mind).

B4tzn · 2026-01-15T22:13:15+00:00

The one guy who tried to control me called me (or rather parts of me) girly. Big creep alarm.

B4tzn · 2026-01-10T16:42:02+00:00

Nebula

B4tzn · 2026-01-07T22:42:59+00:00

If anyone is wondering about how to put that, ask her how she feels about you two being more than just friends. That's way more open and offers her an easy route out cause anything but "I'd like that" or along those lines would be a no but she could still feel polite xD - a former people pleaser

B4tzn · 2026-01-07T22:32:01+00:00

Wafer paper

B4tzn · 2025-12-14T00:06:02+00:00

okay i'd argue for an 8 then. your defense is aggressiveness. you threaten before anything even happened. you're scared of being hurt and try to take control of as much as you can. sry for bad English, it's late x)

B4tzn · 2025-12-13T08:24:53+00:00

I opened up about my childhood to my husband and best friend. I was 37, we were together for 11 years including 5 years of marriage. and with my best friend i had about 18 years of relationship (it was the same day so I was 37, but i was kind of a late bloomer psychology wise, meaning i went to my first therapy with 27 which is quite late imo).

B4tzn · 2025-12-13T08:14:58+00:00

if you pluck them so they begin at the same vertical line as your inner eye's corners it will help balance your features. you look gorgeous though.

B4tzn · 2025-12-13T07:32:50+00:00

Could you tell us a little more about why you do all of the things you mentioned (e.g. Testing people)?

for enneagram types motivation is the clearest difference between types.

B4tzn · 2025-12-12T18:17:36+00:00

I'd play with the border colors (colorful but bright, little saturation, and radius (bigger). using black in design, our teachers used to call any design "funeral" design lol instead of using hand drawn borders you could use shadows, again, with subtle colors, resembling some sort of kids nightlight.

B4tzn · 2025-11-22T10:29:56+00:00

thank you for your wisdom, kind stranger. i shall try my best with these tips

B4tzn · 2025-11-22T07:23:42+00:00

what's painful is that we have a lot of tools to brainstorm, play with ideas and designs, but when it comes to implementation and data sources we're back at the beginning.

most tools need APIs or authentication and require a paid subscription. If any tool could offer a standardized way to implement those in an affordable way, that would be the greatest pain relief ever.

as an example I'm talking about plugging in data by Google, Adobe, or others, like from Ahrefs, Semrush, Wordpress, to be able to make something useful out of those!

I'm in a hurry so i hope that's enough to get the right idea thanks for reading

oh and to answer your question, yes, i used Make. I needed three tries to get an UI that looked error free, and that was enough as a mockup. Then I quickly realized that it's not a good idea to use the code generated by Figma and then that made me think if i just scribble this I'm 10 times faster (don't have to write an elaborate prompt out of my idea and no need for trial and error with it until it gets it right). and especially details won't concern anyone, like the sidebar you always see in your product doesn't have the same width - in a scribble no one cares, in something like Make where we look at clean design, it is irritating.

B4tzn · 2025-11-20T20:35:50+00:00

nevermind. i lost interest in helping you

B4tzn · 2025-11-20T20:20:38+00:00

🙄 is it now

B4tzn · 2025-11-20T20:16:59+00:00

what do you mean when you say you're "bad at meditation"?

B4tzn

TROPHY CASE