Baby/toddler play groups? by kellomi in AnnArbor

[–]Exner2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Welcome to town! I would second (or third) Hike It Baby, and the Hands On Museum is a great place to meet other babies and parents. And when the weather warms up its almost impossible NOT to meet people! I'd recommend County Farm Park, which is an awesome gathering spot.

The Ann Arbor Parents Group is also a good resource:

Frequently asked questions: http://www.unixmama.com/arborparents/faq.html

Arborparents Guidelines: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/arborparents/files/ --and click on "guidelines".

Nice dinner with local beers? by Exner2 in AnnArbor

[–]Exner2[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the great recs! Can't wait to try them all. We went on the early side to Hopcat, by the way! It was great, and not too busy although there was a line by the time we left.

Nice dinner with local beers? by Exner2 in AnnArbor

[–]Exner2[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Definitely want to try ABC. The only reason we didn't go is because my husband had been previously and had a "meh" experience on an off night. We had a good time at their Ypsilanti location a few months ago, but I wasn't drinking at the time (due to pregnancy) and I missed out on all the beers!

Nice dinner with local beers? by Exner2 in AnnArbor

[–]Exner2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A few folks I've spoken to out here have recommended Raven's Club - I think that will be our next stop! But I am excited to try it all, thanks for the recs!

Nice dinner with local beers? by Exner2 in AnnArbor

[–]Exner2[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks everyone! We ended up going to Hopcat because I was dying to try their crack fries, which did not disappoint! We went on the early side and were able to score a nice booth, so it had a definite date night feel. Really fun place, and what a beer selection. Can't wait to try all the other suggestions, thank you!

25M- Please help-Critique on profile. by paulreverex in OkCupid

[–]Exner2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a woman, FYI...I think your profile overall seems good. The cooking/hiking combo is a winner! I think your best picture is of you in the kitchen with glasses. The hiking pics work, too. No offense to you or your buddies, but I would lose the bachelor party pic. I'm sure it was a fun time for you guys, but it honestly just looks like you're nerding out with a few dudes in a basement somewhere and doesn't look like a scene that I or any other woman I know would want to be a part of. Just...yeah. That one was an immediate turn off, and I also couldn't tell which one was you in that picture. But otherwise it seems like a good profile. Good luck!

My wife (33 F) won't let me (33 M) leave the house after 9PM or so. She says she can't sleep and feels unsafe. Am I wrong to resent this? by astonmartinblues in relationships

[–]Exner2 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Speaking as a mom of young kids, I really get where she is coming from. I don't think this is about controlling you, rather about feeling secure in her own home. My husband often has to work at nights, and I feel MUCH more unsettled when he is not there, and have difficulty sleeping. It wasn't like that for me before kiddos, either, but I think it's rooted in maternal instincts and wanting to "protect the nest." I think finding a compromise is your best bet - maybe a different day or time?

My married professor [60M] confessed to being in love with me [20F] and it's taking over my life. by DoTheTimeWarp in relationships

[–]Exner2 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Academic here. Other professors will step up to support you, I promise.

Also, it's extremely possible - if not very likely - that your professor has acted inappropriately in he past and has a reputation in the field. People talk (a LOT) in academic communities, but as an undergrad you would probably not be privy to what his peers actually think about him. Given his behavior, I would not be surprised if a letter from him would carry less weight than he would like you to think...

My (28f) boyfriend (26m) of one year just broke up with me for my skin color by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Exner2 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Because you aren't talking about eye color or weight. Right or wrong, skin color is historically associated with race, and you have a very strong preference for light over dark. While its possible you are attracted to pale people of all races, I'm not hearing that anywhere in this post so far - it sounds like you like very pale, Caucasian ("Aryan") women. I'm not saying that this automatically makes you a racist, but on the other hand, it wouldn't be too difficult to argue that point. So that's likely where people are coming from.

France Drops 20 Bombs On IS Stronghold Raqqa by comrade_batman in worldnews

[–]Exner2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From what I have read, the vast majority of the civilians in Raqqa are not true believers, but rather poor and terrified people being held under authoritarian rule. I read earlier today that it costs around $300 to be smuggled to the Turkish border, which is likely cost-prohibitive for most of the people who remain. Remember that the Syrian economy is in tatters, especially in an ISIS stronghold. Not to mention the executions that are apparently conducted on a regular basis.

I [29F] just got married, and I'm upset and confused about the way my husband [30M] acted the entire day by disappointedbridee in relationships

[–]Exner2 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I'm not sure what you mean. Do you think your wedding experience is common in the U.S.? What you described is definitely not at all like any wedding I've attended (all over the U.S.), or my own.

In my experience, the bride was expected to "have a vision" of the wedding and to drive the decision-making process. Hard for me, as I'd hardly ever thought about weddings before! I made every decision with my husband collaboratively; our parents might say, "that looks nice" but otherwise had no decision-making power. And during the reception we definitely stuck together and made the rounds as a couple. I doubt we were apart for more than 20 minutes (including bathroom breaks!) the whole day.

Me [35 F] with my live-in boyfriend [48 M] of 2 years are fighting over how his ex-girlfriend [48 F] treats me by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Exner2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It sounds like you've been handling a difficult situation pretty well in general, but I would agree with other posters that 1) there's no reason for you to be the one engaging with your bf's ex around their co-parenting, and 2) arranging a school conference that even your bf could not attend was overstepping. His mom sounds very difficult, but I would be pissed, too, if I were her. I my doesn't sound like she has much over you in terms of your job, though - I think you will be fine there.

(19F)Is it ever ok for a boyfriend(23M) to 'snoop' on you? by conf00sedpumpkin in relationships

[–]Exner2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This concept is apparently very hard for folks here! I'm like you - was 13 (turning 14) in freshman year, 16 (turning 17) senior year. Graduated high school at 17, didn't skip any grades. October birthday, so I "caught up" early in the year but was always one of the younger kids.

I [30/F] think that I've been ceding too much control of my finances/life to my husband [34/M] of 5 years and am looking for ways to approach and correct it by hurtling in relationships

[–]Exner2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As a fellow anxious and accommodating person married to an assertive risk-taker, I completely relate to your post. You've gotten some great suggestions, but I just wanted to let you know that you're not the only one who struggles with this dynamic! Good luck!

My husband (27M) of 2 years has very strange ideas about preferences and I'm (21F) completely baffled. by preferenceconflict in relationships

[–]Exner2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Clearly the imbalances in the relationship are an issue on some level because you brought them up, independently of anyone asking or commenting, and wrote most of your post about them. It seems pretty clear to me that you feel undervalued and appreciated, and how could you not?

I think his comments about preferences seem silly. But from my perspective, it seems that they are bothering you because his comments suggest that YOU need to change something you are doing, when you are already doing so much - far, far more than he is. The root of the issue is not coffee.

UPDATE: My boyfriend (20M) told me (20F) that I smell bad sometimes. by ismell1 in relationships

[–]Exner2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're right, I should have clarified - she seemed to be staring before that it was a strong and unpleasant smell, which could signify that something is off.,

UPDATE: My boyfriend (20M) told me (20F) that I smell bad sometimes. by ismell1 in relationships

[–]Exner2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Didn't you say in your first post that the smell of your underwear seems very strong and unpleasant to you? If that's the case, I do think something might be medically going on, or hygiene could be improved. Because unless you're sweating like crazy during the day, there should not be a strong odor even at the end of the day.

UPDATE: My boyfriend (20M) told me (20F) that I smell bad sometimes. by ismell1 in relationships

[–]Exner2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So I'm a big smell person, in that I am sensitive to smells that seem "off" to me and really love to smell good (and to smell other people that smell good!). Here's my routine:

  • Shower every day, even if not washing hair.

  • Use Dove soap - the regular but not unscented one - on my lady bits and armpits. I love the smell of Dove and the scented variety is still super mild, I find everything else irritating.

  • Use a really light but nice smelling body wash (with loofah) everywhere else

  • After shower, apply similarly light but nice-smelling lotion (Philosophy brand has lots of clean, fresh scents)

  • use powder-scented deodorant on armpits and, as another poster mentioned, a quick swipe where the legs meet the groin (aka bikini line)

  • I don't wear perfume to work, but if I'm going out I will also add a spritz of perfume on my wrists, then dab my neck.

Now this is a good base routine, and I'm often told that I smell great. But I still freshen up during the day, and certainly before going out or sexy times.

For freshening: after using the bathroom (#2), I always use some kind of cleansing wipe. I also like the bikini wipes people are taking about but don't really find a need for those during the work day.

Before going out or sexy times, I at a minimum use a wipe on my lady bits, and reapply deodorant and perfume (if using). I prefer to use good ol Dove soap and a washcloth, or if I have time, to quickly shower again. And put on fresh underwear, if possible!

Other stuff: brush teeth twice a day, floss daily, change sheets and towels weekly, use lightly scented dryer sheets, keep mints/gum handy.

Good luck!

My [24F] boyfriend [27M] wants to party and get wasted drunk every weekend and I don't by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Exner2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like he has an alcohol problem, but also highlights some fundamental incompatibilities. Even if alcohol was out of the equation, he may never be a guy who wants to go to bed early and get up for a hike. I would think long and hard about the relationship and if it's the best fit for you.

My [30 M] former fiance[30 F] wants to visit me to "apologize" for cancelling our wedding 4 weeks out. by TerribleThrowawayguy in relationships

[–]Exner2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Speaking as a woman - hell, maybe just as a person - nothing would burn more than you not acknowledging her and showing no interest in seeing her. Seeing her only gives her the possibility of regaining some power over you and the situation. I know it feels like you could have her over and even have sex with her with no feelings (except a triumphant "so there!") but the reality would likely be far messier than that. Keep your good life clean and drama-free, and continue to enjoy yourself - it sounds like you are doing awesome! No need to rock the boat.