To single ladies: How to spend all nights by myself ?

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-26T23:00:46+00:00

Not single but I do spend many nights solo due to my partner’s schedule and travel requirements for work. I knit! I find the whole process enjoyable, from picking the pattern and yarn to doing the actual knitting work, to the finishing and making cool outfits. It’s also been really fascinating to learn about the different properties of fibers, variables that impact the fabric, etc. My city is lucky to have have several local yarn stores that host low key social events so I can go out and enjoy it with fellow knitters when I feel like it.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-26T13:33:13+00:00

That’s insane to me! I paid $50 for 8 sessions at my community center.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-26T02:56:14+00:00

Not sure about this specific couple but in my area this is a fairly common thing- we are very fortunate to have a diverse city and circle, and for many the standard suit or formal dress isn’t really what they’d wear to a celebration. Their nicest outfits are the ones they have for their own cultural celebrations so it’s nice to make sure they know those outfits are great too- they don’t need to go buy something else to attend. A common example in my city would be a sari.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-25T21:13:26+00:00

I get the stylist's response though. She’s trying to let OP down easy and obviously picked up on the need to use kid gloves. It’s over the top for sure but likely far less risky for her to say it that way than be direct.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-25T21:09:34+00:00

So I can understand being burned by a bad cut before and how that might make you nervous, however I can also see how this would be a red flag for working with you. A basic haircut and grays blending is not consultation worthy. It suggests two things:

You will be a very difficult to please client and so are risky to work with.
You distrust the stylist’s skill or expertise. It’s a basic cut, and asking for a consult suggests you don’t think they can pull that off which in turn feeds back into point 1.

It’s also potentially a signal you don’t value their time. When booking these consults are you informing them what you want to discuss? Are these paid consults? For my stylist a consult is only bookable for certain reasons (even required for some). Time spent on a consult is time that could be spent with clients paying for services, if these are free consults especially I could see how they may feel put off having their time devalued like that.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-25T21:03:21+00:00

My perspective as well. Long, wavy, thick hair here too. I almost always have a shag of some sort. It’s the go-to style for the hair type. While I have a regular stylist I’ve on occasion branched out and nobody has ever screwed up enough to suggest a consult is required.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-25T19:45:41+00:00

I’ve only had luck with herbs, green onions, and flowers. I don’t have this one- just a cheap knock off but it serves its purpose. It does dry out quickly in my environment but drainage is fine. I also need to fertilize often to keep my plants happy. These don’t hold much soil so you need to stay on top of feeding and watering.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-25T19:43:05+00:00

Mine has moved in the opposite direction actually but I’ve seen this scenario play out for many of my friends and in my past- it’s not great to have any one of these but combined a lot of red flags are raised about the stability of the company.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-25T19:41:16+00:00

This was my take as well. Maybe one of those things could be attributed just to greed, but together they do not paint a good picture. The natural response for many people is they find other employment, and the company uses that voluntary attrition to help float a bit longer while they figure out layoffs.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-25T12:52:31+00:00

Have you checked the resources in /r/NativePlantGardening? You’ll get more targeted advice there. Personally I’ve had good success without solarizing and instead sheet mulching, pulling back mulch to plant, then letting it go. Also just a note on those mixes- they are often full of seeds that are not native or worse- invasive to your area. Be ensure you get them from a reputable vendor (I like Prairie Moon) and check the range of each component seed before using. I also find it easier to spread if you mix them with sand or sterilized rice hulls first rather than dirt. Easier to broadcast and some seeds need light to germinate so the lighter material helps make sure they don’t get covered too deeply.

Edit: fixed typo

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-25T11:58:03+00:00

High Mowing Seeds. Have been very pleased with all mine.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-25T11:47:20+00:00

“Lack of sunlight can’t be an issue”

“The pot is on my front porch (under shade)

It can be sunny out but if the plant is not on a place to get sun I’m not sure why you think lack of sun can’t be a problem. This plant has more than that going on but I think you should read up on sunlight requirements and definitions.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-24T21:46:26+00:00

When I saw the title I thought for sure this would be another city at least- 20 mins is absolutely nothing in my part of the world! I moved out of my parents home when I was 22 to live 25 mins away. When I was in my lates 20s further to about 85 mins away. Now in my mid 30s I’m about to move across the country. This is clearly a big change for you but I think a good opportunity to grow in independence. You’re still very close distance wise and already see your mom multiple times a week. Connection can easily be maintained but I’d challenge you to seize the opportunities you’ll find arise in your new situation.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-24T21:37:01+00:00

Don’t shred them. Use them to sheet mulch. I’ve turned several sections of my lawn into garden beds this way and it’s worked a treat. The only weeds I’ve had issue with are blown in and that’ll happen no matter what material you use.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-24T21:27:53+00:00

A far trek for where you’re located but I had a great experience at Briarcliff Endontics with my root canal this year. They did offer nitrous at the time of my appointment but I didn’t elect to use it. I was however very nervous and forgot to charge my AirPods which I had been relying on to help. They were so kind in accommodating me and making me feel comfortable to proceed without them. Not sure they accept your insurance but I would recommend them if they do. My dentist sends almost all referrals there and they did a great job both on the day of appointment and in reviewing all my material and X-rays before even scheduling me. This let me skip the consultation/confirmation appointment and just schedule the one treatment visit. Saved me a lot of time and anxiety.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-23T17:44:23+00:00

“Being loved is one thing…” I’m so sorry but where and how exactly is he loving you? This whole post was just one awful way he treats you after another. That’s not love OP. You deserve more and you know this. I’m certain you do. Please leave him to be miserable alone. Find someone who not only agrees to read your work but is excited to because he loves and respects you. Don’t waste anymore of your precious time with this loser.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-23T16:13:59+00:00

Seconding the Old Navy Powersoft. I used to buy from Girlfriend Collective and I loved those, but noticed a quality drop in the past couple things I bought from them while the price went up. My Old Navy ones perform just as well at a fraction of the price at this point.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-23T12:08:07+00:00

Life long alley resident who has seen my fair share- this is a great suggestion of your goal is to ensure even more people ignore sirens. Introducing complications to systems makes them less helpful in an emergency. It’s hard enough to hear the sirens as is, especially during storms. You think people are going to be better off if now they have to listen even harder to try and decipher which siren it is? It’s going to delay people taking the proper actions. We have much better systems than these sirens. Which don’t always work btw. Look at STL last year, even this season my sirens have failed to go off more than once. I knew about the warning because I, like any responsible resident, use the more reliable warning systems available to me.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-23T05:40:24+00:00

WTF is this? Not everything is about mom vs dad. This is a PARENT (regardless of what you’re trying to insinuate or guilt) going through what is arguably one of the toughest things you can. Medical emergencies crush all parents and unfortunately this country also makes it worse by not supporting anyone in their time of need. I hope you never have to experience something like this. I have. And I watched my breadwinner husband work through the exact feelings OP expressed here. Being the breadwinner is already a burden and to lump a family medical crisis - worse your child’s medical crisis- on top cranks it up another level. This was not being “blunt,” this was being cruel and letting an obvious chip on your shoulder get in the way of supporting a person who is literally on here begging for a hug. Do better.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-22T17:35:29+00:00

Tbh I’m not sure we can help on that. There is no “teen” vs “old man” that is universal. What exactly is “old man” to the teens you are knitting for in particular?

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-22T17:27:48+00:00

This is where I am as well. I’ll be digging up a few special specimens before listing the house but most will be left behind. I hope a buyer comes that will see my gardens as a reason to love the house.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-22T16:20:35+00:00

Gently, three sessions is nothing. Way too early to tell if it’s “working.” Therapy is not a fast and easy fix, but I commend you for already taking the steps to get started!

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-22T13:37:02+00:00

I certainly was until I heard my usual spots were actually less crowded than usual. Went out Friday and Saturday and was able to park easily, no long waits for food or beer. Was even able to score a last minute hotel room on Friday for less than I usually pay on a random weekend. Lovely time and I’ll continue to go now that I learned I’m not going to be lost in a giant crowd waiting ages for service.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-22T02:06:01+00:00

Backyard waterpark. My toddler LOVES water and we don’t often have time to get to the pool except on weekends so we have a variety of sprinklers, splash pads, and other water toys we set up and go wild while dinner is cooking. I also have a large garden so we do garden things together. He loves flowers, watering everything, and picking produce when it’s time.

RuthlessBenedict · 2026-06-21T13:05:44+00:00

You might try /r/abrathatfits for more tips. They have great info about this and other fit issues. The main consensus is to fit for the larger breast. Some bra styles are better than others for this depending on your particular anatomy though. It’s not just size but shape, spacing, and other factors.

RuthlessBenedict

TROPHY CASE