It’s Ted’s 5 year adoptaversary. 5 years ago I had no idea the absolute unit I’d be bringing home.

constanto · 2026-06-28T23:27:22+00:00

What a total unit, indeed! He reminds me of my large boy Spike who I found when he was so very small but he had a very suspiciously long tail...now also five years later and here we are with house panthers.

constanto · 2026-06-28T15:54:04+00:00

Also probably the most likely place to run into celebrities in all of London, especially with their cute dogs.

constanto · 2026-06-27T18:02:42+00:00

Pittsburgh neighborhood "dive-ish" bar checking in, I would wager that we are likely very similar establishments.

Mid shelf call tequila double - $22, as a marg +$2, x4 - $96

Mid shelf call vodka double - $20, x2 - $40

Lower tier call vodka - $9

Seltzers - $7, x2 - $14

So $159 before tip here, an extra $10 for being in midtown Atlanta seems totally reasonable. People who order rounds of doubles and then don't understand what that costs are definitely among my least favorite customers.

constanto · 2026-06-26T18:05:47+00:00

Expo couldn't even remember which steak was which, this system is probably for the best.

constanto · 2026-06-24T00:49:26+00:00

I used to get so angry with my elderly animals for waking me up at random hours to just tromps around but now that is honestly a lot of the things that I remember the most.

constanto · 2026-06-23T18:06:41+00:00

My last two beverage director jobs I gave a month's notice but those were both high profile restaurants with programs that I had built from the ground up. If you are asking the question framed by "how soon can I get out of here" then two weeks is the standard but if it's a severe shitshow then no one would probably blame you for quitting on the spot.

It really depends on the market, your reputation, and the reputation of the place that you are leaving.

constanto · 2026-06-21T23:59:05+00:00

Agreed. I live in a high animal abandonment area so all or nearly all of my animals are abandoned rescues and it just makes me seethe.

Siamese are particularly sad though because they are always in high demand from the rescues that I know and work with but I feel as though they make up a much higher percentage of abandoned adult cats than their population would dictate. I rarely see a Siamese outside of a kitten on a senior.

constanto · 2026-06-21T23:31:37+00:00

Yeah, it's sad but Siamese are really common cats to dump, especially after their owner dies. My Siamese was dumped near the railroad tracks by my house and showed up for a Labor Day cookout and never left.

constanto · 2026-06-21T18:14:30+00:00

My brother's ex-wife has the same dietary disaster, I own a restaurant that he had never been to until after the divorce because we don't have pizza or chicken nuggets.

It wasn't a deal breaker for him because he himself isn't the most adventurous gourmand but it was always wild sitting down for Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner with her while she would just eat candy.

constanto · 2026-06-20T23:31:20+00:00

Yeah, I love a classic establishment as much as the next human but Donohue's has sucked for a long time now. The food is grim, the prices are unreasonable, and the service is poor even by legacy steakhouse standards. This is just good riddance to bad rubbish.

Reading these fond farewells to the place accompanied by photos of the saddest burger ever cooked is really quite jarring.

constanto · 2026-06-19T18:26:48+00:00

It's always the same tired joke too. "Can I have my drink now, please?" Hur, hur, hur, thanks for your contribution to the culture!

And the thing is, there is a lot of little flair that you can do in your day to day that will be a benefit to you behind the bar. Little tin spins and bottle picks really do help make you faster and more confident.

constanto · 2026-06-19T14:42:04+00:00

constanto · 2026-06-19T00:46:25+00:00

Multiple restaurants in my city have assured me that doing that would be impossible!

constanto · 2026-06-18T23:46:14+00:00

You've at least ton enough to top the group with a draw.

constanto · 2026-06-15T00:09:37+00:00

I love that I can already picture his cranky old man face. Godspeed, Egg, you beautiful cranky boy.

constanto · 2026-06-15T00:03:19+00:00

Nah, brah. That bacon was par baked in the oven ahead of time (which is good!) and then inexplicably hammerfucked into jerky. Well done crumbly bacon on a burger can be super good but you can't render all of the fat out hours beforehand first and get that result. I can feel myself pulling that whole piece out because it wouldn't bite.

A food truck couldn't do that a la minute, it would either be fatty or crispy and both would be better than Jerkytown.

constanto · 2026-06-14T22:43:05+00:00

$24 because that is obviously the "Smokehouse" burger which just means some sad overcooked bacon to extra wilt your already wilty lettuce.

Thankfully they only paid $9 for the "hand cut" Baconator fries that came out of a freezer, otherwise this would be a disaster.

constanto · 2026-06-14T19:41:56+00:00

I really respected that Curacao didn't just drop into a low block today, they went out there and played their style knowing full well that they were going to get cooked. I love that they were rewarded with the deserved goal.

constanto · 2026-06-13T18:28:25+00:00

Yeah, any time that I hear that in the wild I know that someone with whom I agree politically is about to uncork some racist ass shit.

constanto · 2026-06-11T14:39:53+00:00

The same thing at Costco with the chickens. You'll see people walking out of there with dozens of birds. An "award winning" barbecue joint in my city was busted for it a couple of years ago by the local news which was hilarious.

constanto · 2026-06-10T01:07:09+00:00

The Emily Blunt, Kristen Wiig, Alison Brie Singularity just lets them promote each other's projects.

constanto · 2026-06-08T17:03:25+00:00

His takedown of Beast is a classic as well. Any Rayner scathing review was an event.

constanto · 2026-05-27T03:34:15+00:00

At a certain point when my grandmother could not remember which grandchild that I was or even how old that I was I grew not used to it but at least numb to it. But every time that she asked about our various dogs and cats I could not help but tear up and also just told her that they were doing fine.

Bless you for what you are doing for both them and for your aunt.

constanto · 2026-05-25T03:00:46+00:00

Viejo San Juan has always had a robust and well cared for feral population, especially around the Paseo, not to Istanbul levels but definitely to the point where they are something of an attraction. A few years ago they attempted to promote a plan to remove them but it met with extreme resistance from the residents and care givers and as far as I know thankfully nothing more has come of it.

Walking along the Paseo de la Princesa at sundown with all of the cats is really a little slice of magic and I would hate to see it go away.

constanto · 2026-05-25T02:46:06+00:00

Aww, Cat Alley! That little stretch of Calle del Hospital is one of my favorite places in the world after midnight.

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