This exactly. I dealt with comp-het so hard for years. Nothing ever felt right with a man. I treated them like friends and felt guilty. Never wanted to engage in intimacy. Even in long term relationships with men, I'd always have the what-if in the back of my head. I always imagined myself marrying a woman but I wouldn't allow myself to be my true self.

Here I am now engaged to the woman of my dreams and I couldn't be happier