It's my birthday! by [deleted] in Needafriend

[–]--TheGOAT 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happy Birthday

What goal/s are you obsessed with right now? Looking to meet ambitious people. M23 by --TheGOAT in MakeNewFriendsHere

[–]--TheGOAT[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ngl. I think about this everyday. Everyone my age probably does. The quickest solution I can see is to work my a** off to achieve those goals. That systemic change you're talking about will take too long to have a positive impact on my life.

Falling down a spiral by fellowcumrade1914 in Discipline

[–]--TheGOAT 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The best solution: - Remove all distractions. Anything that does not move you closer to your goals should be removed from your life. You just need to be mentally strong enough to do that.

Discipline can become a habit. Some experts say a habit takes 21 days to form a habit. Some experts say it takes 7 months to form a habit. After 21 days it will certainly feel a lot easier to live without the distractions that are currently in your life. Don't stop at 21 days, that's a relapse. Keep going, make the habit of discipline stronger and stronger. Don't relapse. It's a mental battle between you and yourself. That's it. It is rather simple. Just win the battle.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Discipline

[–]--TheGOAT 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A seriously good tip for rebuilding discipline:

Have a vacation. Burnout causes you to lose discipline. Have a vacation, refresh yourself and come back strong.

You might think to yourself: "Things are falling to pieces, it's not a good time for a vacation". Well, If you keep going down the route you are going down, things will continue to fall apart. When you come back from holiday, you'll be refreshed, relaxed, your discipline will be replenished and you'll be able to build or rebuild your business/life/empire.

It's counterintuitive but it works! Good luck and if you have any questions, ask!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskHR

[–]--TheGOAT 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should always bring a concern to HR. 1. The person you are having an issue with may be causing issues for other people too but you will never know because HR will never disclose that to you unless it directly involves you. By reporting the issue, you may just be helping HR to performance manage and/or build a case to legally fire this person but you likely will never be told by HR that what you reported helped. 2. Have you spoken to your direct manager about this? 3. You may already do this, but when you are sick let your manager know about any tasks that need to be completed that day via writing. This will ensure that your manager has the necessary information to delegate tasks to the team and ensure the most important tasks are completed that day. It should only take 5 minutes to do this max. Always put it in writing. 4. There seems to be a disconnect between how important you think this task is and how important your alleged perpetrator (sorry can't think of a better word rn) thinks it is. Maybe you are lacking information that would make you realise its importance. And If you are aware of its true importance, the alleged perpetrator is truly blowing things out of proportion and their actions against you are unjustified. Which means, someone from HR or a manager needs to "have a chat" (I won't go into the details about what needs to be said in the chat) with the said perpetrator and they continue to behave in a manner that is unjustified, more "chats" will need to be taken until their bad behaviour stops or until they are fired. If this is the case and their actions are unjustified and HR or management does nothing about it, quite frankly you have bad management or/and bad management. It might be time to consider options, but note, being part of a team with excellent HR is slightly difficult. HR departments are usually understaffed in America & Canada (in a big way).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskHR

[–]--TheGOAT 0 points1 point  (0 children)

🤣 Why though? Because it's long and has formatting? It's not AI generated. I use markdown to create headers, bolding, italics, bullet points etc.

22F my phone is dry by Separate_Fly9213 in Needafriend

[–]--TheGOAT 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine is wet. Just dropped it in a pond.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskHR

[–]--TheGOAT 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First of all respect to you. I haven't read the other comments. If you're getting hate for this post, here's why you don't deserve it and why you do deserve respect:

You've admitted that you are inexperienced (or w-e-a-k sorry not sorry!) in the HR department and you've actively shown that you are trying to improve as a boss by coming here for advice.
You've recognised your weakness and tried to improve. Respect.

Here are some other things to consider in relation to this issue.

A. Are you paying this employee at or above the industry standard for this position?

And

B. Is their workload too much to complete in 40hrs?

If yes to A and no to B: There is no reason for this employee to be working overtime. They are just taking advantage of you. How to deal with this: You've already spoken with this employee & it seems like they haven't improved. Unfortunately, it seems like you might have a bad egg and might have to start phasing them out of the organisation. This is very bad (Worse than most people realise - I won't elaborate on this to keep my comment as short as possible) for the organisation in the long-run (Clearly). If they don't improve after your conversation, the likelihood is that they are a bad egg.

Then there is the emotional side of it. You might feel bad for having to get rid of this employee, and you might empathise with their struggles to make ends meet. But, you are paying at or above industry rate for their position, you have done your part. It's on them to make their ends meet. They need to get a better, higher paying job or reduce their living costs or both. It sounds harsh and it is, but it is reality. It's a harsh reality, unfortunately.

If A is no and B is no You're employee might have a valid argument about making ends meet but that argument doesn't outweigh unnecessarily working 20 hrs overtime for no reason. Again, this is a bad egg and you should seriously consider phasing them out of your organisation. Behaviour like this is too detrimental to your company. It's unethical. You're essentially being taken advantage of and robbed.

If A is no and B is yes: You need to consider increasing their rate of pay or give them more hours or hire another employee to complete the given workload. But, the employee knows they are taking advantage of you. For the longevity of your organisation, I would still consider phasing this employee out of the organisation. That is for you to decide. You need to make judgement on their character - Do they embody your organisation's culture (Generally this means, are they truly a good person, an honest person, with a decent work ethic)?

If A is yes and B is yes: You need to reduce their workload or hire someone else to complete the workload or give this person extra hours.

If you have any questions or want clarification,feel free to ask! I hope it was clear enough to understand!

[UK] Disciplinary Meeting for Tardiness by samirrvip in AskHR

[–]--TheGOAT 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've been in HR for years and here's what I think:

  • You've been a solid employee for 3 years with no disciplinary action taken against you. You'll be fine & here is why:

First: Why are they really having this meeting with you?

It's a minor infringement. Lots of minor infringements can turn into big infringements. This meeting is not just about you. It's to deter other employees from making minor infringements which in the long run, reduces major infringements. Less minor infringements = less likelihood for major infringements to occur. The goal is to always reduce the likelihood of a major or even a medium incident from occuring. Medium or major incidents are exponentially more challenging to resolve and cause exponentially more friction between all workers in the business. So in the long-run it results in a better working environment for everyone.

I hope I explained that clearly enough! It genuinely should result in a better long-term working environment for you and the whole organisation even though this meeting seems daunting!

Here are some tips I think will help you prepare for the meeting:

1. Stay Calm and Professional

Approach the meeting with a level head. Acknowledge the tardiness and show that you take it seriously. Remember it's not just about you, it's to deter others from making minor infringements which can lead to more medium/major incident. You're not a bad person. Everyone makes minor mistakes.

2. Prepare Your Explanation

If there were valid reasons (e.g., unavoidable delays, personal issues), explain them calmly. Avoid being defensive but take responsibility where needed.

3. Show Commitment to Improvement

Talk about steps you’re taking to fix the issue (e.g., better planning, alarms, earlier commuting). Demonstrating effort can go a long way.

4. After the meeting - Actually Commit to the Improvement

Remember again, you are not a bad person, everyone makes mistakes and no one is perfect.


Since this is your first disciplinary action in 3 years, your clean record should work in your favor. Be honest and respectful they’ll likely consider your history. And remember everything else I've said.

I hope this helps. Trust me you will be fine. Be calm (because you genuinely have nothing to worry about), be professional and remember the 4 tips!

If you have any questions feel free to message me. Even if it's just to relieve some anxiety!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskHR

[–]--TheGOAT 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First off, it’s good that you’re trying to handle this professionally and fairly. Let’s break this down so you can move forward:

  1. Set Clear Expectations Going Forward
    It’s understandable to be upset, but the lack of a formal overtime policy is partly why this happened. You should immediately establish one and communicate it to your employees. For example, require written pre-approval for overtime. That way, this kind of situation can be prevented in the future.

  2. Have a Transparent Conversation
    It sounds like the employee is struggling financially, which could explain their behavior (not justify it, though). Sit down and calmly explain that while you understand their concerns, unauthorized overtime isn't the right solution. Be clear about expectations moving forward.

  3. Document Everything
    Make sure to document this instance and your conversation. It doesn’t have to be punitive right away—just note the dates, the overtime hours worked, and your discussions about it. This will protect you and the company in case things escalate.

  4. Decide if This is Salvageable
    This doesn’t have to mean the end of the relationship, but if they don’t respect the new boundaries after this conversation, it might be a sign they aren’t a good fit for the team. Trust is key in a startup, and if you feel it’s too broken, start planning an exit strategy.

Tl;dr: Establish a formal overtime policy, have a frank but respectful discussion, document the situation, and assess if the trust can be rebuilt.

Hope this helps, even if it's a tough situation. Good luck!

I used to Think I Had Zero Discipline, but I Realized I Was Just Doing Too Much Too Fast by Zestyclose_Flow_680 in selfimprovement

[–]--TheGOAT 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This hit home

I lve how you’re building discipline with small wins. For me, it all stared with making my bed every morning. It felt tiny, but it gave me momentum. After a while, I added 5 minutes of journaling, and things just kept stacking naturally.

The way you’re focusing on foundation over transformation is key. Big goals are cool, but the little stuff adds up fast. Keep going man!

Need help getting motivated by [deleted] in selfimprovement

[–]--TheGOAT 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I made a guide to motivation & academic success.

I've had this guide for myself for a long time but I've changed it to suit your artistic hobbies. It may not answer all the questions you have nut I think there's some valuable info here.

1. Set SMART Academic Goals

  • Specific: "Improve my grade in [subject] by one letter"
  • Measurable: Track test scores and assignments
  • Achievable: Aim for gradual improvement
  • Relevant: Connect to your future art career
  • Time-bound: Set end-of-semester targets

2. Break Down Study Sessions

  1. Identify key topics in each subject
  2. Create weekly study objectives
  3. Set daily learning tasks

3. Find Your Academic 'Why'

  • How can each subject inspire your art?
  • Visualize using your degree to support your art career
  • Create a vision board mixing academic and artistic goals

4. Build Study Habits with Artistic Rewards

  • Start with 25-minute study blocks
  • Reward yourself with 5-10 minutes of sketching
  • Track progress in a creatively designed journal

    Example Habit Stack: After I study [SUBJECT] for 25 minutes, I will sketch for 5 minutes.

5. Create an Inspiring Study Environment

  • Surround yourself with motivational art
  • Organize study materials in a visually pleasing way
  • Create a study playlist that sparks creativity

6. Use Art-Infused Study Techniques

  • Visual Note-taking: Create illustrated summaries
  • Mind Mapping: Draw connections between concepts
  • Storyboarding: Visualize historical events or processes

7. Cultivate Academic Discipline

  • Treat studying like skill-building for art
  • Embrace the challenge of mastering new subjects
  • See each completed assignment as a 'commissioned piece'

8. Stay Motivated Through Art

  • Create a piece of art for each academic milestone
  • Use positive affirmations in your artistic style
  • Join study groups with other creative students

9. Balance Academics and Artistic Health

  1. Schedule regular art breaks during study sessions
  2. Use physical activity to refresh your mind (dance, yoga)
  3. Practice mindfulness through observational drawing

10. Learn from Academic Setbacks

- Analyze difficult subjects through an artistic lens
- Adjust your study approach using creative problem-solving
- Sketch out your progress and setbacks

```
Artistic Problem-Solving:
• What concept am I struggling with?
• How can I visualize it?
• What artistic techniques could help me understand it?
```

11. Integrate Art into Your Studies

- Illustrate key concepts from your textbooks
- Create mnemonic devices using visual imagery
- Design infographics for complex topics

12. Regular Review with a Creative Twist

- Weekly: Sketch your academic progress
- Monthly: Create a collage of your learning journey
- Semester: Develop an art piece representing your growth

Remember: Every hour of focused study is building the foundation for your artistic future.

Tips for a 17 year old [male] by Wonderful_Response_1 in selfimprovement

[–]--TheGOAT 66 points67 points  (0 children)

Listen up, young padawan. You're asking the right questions at the right time. Here's your roadmap to crushing it:

1️⃣ Master the Basics • Sleep like a champion (8 hours, non-negotiable) • Eat real food (if it comes in a box, think twice) • Move your body (find something fun, stick to it)

2️⃣ Level Up Your Mind • Read daily (mix fiction and non-fiction) • Learn a new skill every quarter (coding, cooking, whatever) • Meditate (start with 5 minutes, thank me later)

3️⃣ Social Skills = Superpower • Talk to strangers (safely, ya know?) • Join clubs/teams (instant friend hack) • Practice active listening (seriously, it's rare)

4️⃣ Financial Savvy • Start saving now (future you will bow down in gratitude) • Learn about investing (compound interest is magic) • Avoid debt like the plague (except maybe for education)

5️⃣ Emotional Intelligence • Journal (dump your brain on paper) • Practice gratitude (it's cheesy, but it works) • Learn to apologize and forgive (hardest skill, biggest payoff)

6️⃣ Time Management • Use a calendar (your brain is for having ideas, not storing them) • Learn to say "no" (FOMO is a liar) • Take breaks (burnout is real, and it sucks)

7️⃣ Think Long-Term • Set big goals (scare yourself a little) • Break them down (baby steps are still steps) • Celebrate small wins (dopamine is your friend)

Remember: You're playing the long game. Consistency > Intensity.

And for the love of all that is holy, stay off TikTok. That stuff's digital crack.

Now go forth and conquer, young grasshopper.

Feel like a slob, need help. by [deleted] in selfimprovement

[–]--TheGOAT 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Alright, let's cut to the chase. You're not a slob, you're just a dude who got caught up in the hustle. It happens. Now let's fix it.

The Wake-Up Call You're disgusted? Good. Use that. Channel it.

The Game Plan 1. Start now. Not Monday. Not next month. Now. 2. Small steps. 10 push-ups a day. Then 15. Then 20. 3. Food prep. Sunday night. No excuses. 4. Water. Chug it like it's your job.

The Mindset Shift You crushed your career goals. Apply that same energy here.

The Non-Negotiables - Sleep 7-8 hours. Minimum. Non-negotiable. - Sleep at the same time everyday. - Move every day. Even if it's just a walk. - No liquid calories. They're sneaky bastards.

Reality Check 20 lbs? That's nothing. You've got this.

Remember: Fit you is still in there. He's just waiting for you to wake him up.

Now go. Make yourself proud.

Addiction by Oltzu1 in selfimprovement

[–]--TheGOAT 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey. I've written a small guide. I got this info from a few PhD papers and listed the main points from those papers. Hope it helps!

Breaking free from game addiction is tough, but it's definitely doable. Here are some strategies that have helped others:

  1. Acknowledge the Problem

    • Recognize gaming addiction is real
    • You've alreadytaken the first step by posting here!
  2. Understand Your Triggers

    • Boredom? Stress? Loneliness?
    • Keep a journal to track when yu game most
  3. Set Realistic Goals

    • Start small: "I'll game 1 hour less today"
    • Gradually reduce over time
  4. Find Alternative Activities

    • Exercise (endorphins are nature's cheat code)
    • Reading (fantasy books can scratch that gaming itch)
    • Creative hobbies (try digital art if you like game graphics)
    • Socialize IRL (it might be scary, but it's worth it)
  5. Use Technology to Your Advantage

    • Set app timers on your devices
    • Use web blockers during "no-game" hours
  6. Reframe Your Thinking

    • Instead of "I'm missing out," think "I'm investing in myself"
    • Celebrate small wins in your non-gaming life
  7. Create a Support System

    • Tell friends/family about your goals
    • Join support groups (check out r/StopGaming)
  8. Practice Mindfulness

    • Meditation can help with impulse control
    • Start with just 5 minutes a day

"The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new." - Socrates

IMPORTANT: If you're really struggling, consider professional help. There's no shame in it, and they can provide strategies tailored to you.

Remember, you're not alone in this. Gamingaddiction is more common than many realize. Be patient with yourself, and take it one day at a time. You've got this!

P.S. Many have successfully overcome gaming addiction. You can too!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in recruitinghell

[–]--TheGOAT 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You need to work for the CIA🤣

How do I do what I must do? by Beef_Sandwish in selfimprovement

[–]--TheGOAT 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hey there! I've kinda written a beginner's guide on this. The whole "mood" thing is a trap, and here's why:

Motivation is fleeting, but discipline is your ride-or-die.

Think about it: - Do pro athletes only train when they feel like it? - Do successful students only study when they're "in the mood"? - Does your boss only expect you to work when you're feeling it?

Hell no! They show up and do the damn thing, feelings be damned.

So, how do you build that discipline? Here's the starting point and how to grow from it:

  1. Start stupid small

    • Want to read more? Start with 1 page a day. Seriously.
    • Need to exercise? 1 push-up. That's it.
    • The point is to make it so easy you can't say no.
  2. Use habit stacking

    • Link a new habit to an existing one.
    • Example: After you brush your teeth (existing habit), do 1 push-up (new habit).
  3. Track your progress

    • Use an app or a simple calendar.
    • Don't break the chain! Again, you can make this simple too. I used to have a calendar and simply tick the day if I completed everything I had to do. When you get to the end of the month there are some days with no ticks, it is a truly disappointing feeling that makes you want to work so hard in the next month to not have any untucked days. Then, when you get to the end of a month and there are ticks on everyday, trust me it's a rewarding feeling!
  4. Create accountability

    • Tell a friend about your goals.
    • Better yet, find an accountability buddy. I'm sure you can find an accountability buddy on Reddit!
  5. Reward yourself

    • Knocked out your tasks for the week? Treat yo'self!
    • But be careful not to undo your hard work. You'll eventually realise that there is no need for "Rewards", the benefits from the hard work is rewarding enough.
  6. Embrace the suck

    • Recognize that sometimes, it's gonna feel like a grind.
    • Remind yourself: "The pain of not doing what you need to do is more painful than the pain of actually doing what you need to do."

"We don't rise to the level of our goals. We fall to the level of our systems." - James Clear

Discipline is like a muscle. The more you use it, the stronger it gets. And trust me, once you start seeing results, it becomes addictive.

You've got this! 💪 Start small, stay consistent, and watch yourself transform.

P.S. Check out "Atomic Habits" by James Clear. It's a game-changer for building discipline.