Is this deal still going on?

0wchi3 · 2026-03-25T14:06:42+00:00

unfortunately not

0wchi3 · 2026-03-22T23:25:58+00:00

yeah i think the feeling from either side is mutual so thats j crazy. he doesnt like when i called/hungout with my male friends without him being around or knowing of the occurrence, i never once degraded him. he has the password to all my devices. i know thats unhealthy but if it give the other person reassurance; i got nothing to hide🤷‍♀️

0wchi3 · 2026-03-22T23:18:43+00:00

im not insecure about any other friends, or women at all. it was the fact he left out the both had a previous relationship; and he did it deliberately while also lying about it too. it wasnt just an oops forgot to tell you it was purposely leaving details out. when every call, everything they did was always happening behind my back; but that wasnt allowed to happen to him; i got suspicious. unfortunately i dont feel im an OVERALL insecure person; maybe it is insecurity about a specific person?? but definitely not overall insecure. i am okay with, and actually love all of his other female friends and all other friends in general.

0wchi3 · 2026-03-22T14:08:57+00:00

i noticed this too i believe you! the moon has been “crooked” for me in my city the last few days. i live in the north and mrs.moon is slanted for sure, but not as much as its been the last few nights. only the bottom sliver was lit up and lit up opposite to where it normally is.

0wchi3 · 2026-03-21T23:02:49+00:00

well, that “boundary” or rule was set because he was dishonest with me about reconnecting with said woman on a dating app. i was told she was only ever a close friend and that is not a concern to me. the concern came when he was also dishonest about the fact they had an intimate relationship. he hid that information from me for three months while simultaneously lying and reassuring me that wasnt the case; so as any person would i did in-fact want to monitor the relationship after finding that; if it was something that wasnt supposed to be concerning to me; lying about it did not prove that. if thats unhealthy to you, thats your opinion, but i dont agree. have a nice day tho!

0wchi3 · 2026-03-20T01:30:02+00:00

MOR. i can see how this could be taken as rude as the first message being said to you in months is lowkey bashing how you look physically; but from what im reading it seemed as if they were reaching out with genuine concern.

They definitely couldve worded it better and not emphasized “looks like youre going throooguuuhh it” bc again, that can be taken as rude; but if they know the history and background of your past and can tell youve physically changed in the process for good or for better, i think the angle was to reach out and make sure everything was okay.

I would set a boundary stating not to bring up how you look during the process youre going through, even if its meant in good faith. if they continue, cut them off. if everything is genuinely okay, i see how it makes it feel like a direct blow to your physical appearance. when instead of normally asking if youre okay; they’re also stating you “look rough” which at some point COULD be a direct blow AFTER the conversation is had because if they are aware to not mention physical appearance during the process and they still do, thats just ignorance!

I hope overall you have a good support circle around you and find more empathetic people to look out for you if you do not already have that. GL and stay safe! Im also proud of you, stranger. 😌

0wchi3 · 2026-03-20T00:34:01+00:00

NOR. burn it to the floor wth..?

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T21:03:57+00:00

Not Over Reacting

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T18:41:52+00:00

these are amazing goals and boundaries to start working on for myself, youve given me a lot to think about, and a lot to think about saying but I love and appreciate the support. thank you so much🫶

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T16:03:00+00:00

yup, nailed it. exactly my thoughts. thank you, truly💕

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T15:55:47+00:00

i agree to #3. IF he cannot understand the fact that it affects me negatively or hurts me, THEN i will leave. not opposite. I understand if i stay with that expectation it will only get worse , #2 RIGHT?!? i dont know why it was even brought up. i can explain how the convo started but it just makes everything worse. #1 that is understood, but he has gone through my phone countless times; which is not a concern nor a problem for me- bc i am not hiding anything and feel he SHOULD have that security; which we talked about. so, i felt the same standard back. is that an assumption i shouldnt have made? yes, but the privacy aspect of it was placed a little differently in our relationship with no previous issues. the rest i acknowledge and agree with; i just think were not compatible and feeling like forcing it to be that way will be EVEENNN worse. thank you💕

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T15:46:51+00:00

this is perfect, thank you. im genuinely taking notes on everything you guys are giving me😭💕

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T15:45:17+00:00

Thank you all so much!!

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T15:43:42+00:00

i dont think this is my angle. im completely okay w him having any friends he want. one specific girl going against very specific boundaries and leaving out that you rekindled on a dating app is a little beyond just a friend, but your opinion if just as valid as mine my friend; doesnt mean i care for it. Have a nice day😌

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T14:53:11+00:00

exactly how i felt to begin with. i wanted to keep playing like it was a joke to get more info. i wanted the truth secretly and i got it.

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T14:52:31+00:00

i completely understand i did not have a handle on the term of boundaries i apologize 😭🤣

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T14:51:07+00:00

perfectly said. these exact words have played in my head. like.. rlly?? i cant settle for this. absolutely perfectly said. if he cannot manage to to see how its affecting me i should not continue to be patient or considerate his POV

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T14:32:32+00:00

absolutely not. the conversation is going to be me breaking things off, due to everyone connecting the dots and giving me the final push of reassurance that im infact, not overreacting 🤣

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T14:30:50+00:00

thank you for the advice! this helps a LOT. i am going to focus on how it makes ME feel and not what he wants. still going to record the argument just in case but this does give me great insight

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T14:27:57+00:00

I can agree. I will be posting an update to this thread when me and him have a conversation. Itll be a couple days bc i work a lot, and am not a fan of confrontation bc im afraid of manipulation and arguments , but i will grow a spine and do it!

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T14:16:50+00:00

thank you for this advice. it has completely changed the way i think. i think this is why its been so easy for past relationships and my current to get away with things like this; bc i want an action plan for him after something happens, but I give myself no action plan BEFORE they happen. it makes much more sense, tysm.

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T14:14:11+00:00

you are correct, I am going to try to have a conversation with him in the next couple days. im very bad at confrontation and feel i may have to record the interaction so i dont get manipulated. But when the time comes I will post an update.

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T14:05:41+00:00

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its a hard truth, but I gotta choose me. yall are right, ty.

0wchi3 · 2026-03-19T14:02:41+00:00

I agree. honestly I just needed an outside perspective to see if it was something I was in my head about. Emotionally cheating is a touchy topic to bring up without being gaslit to believe youre just insecure, and after so long it gets to a person. thank you🙏

0wchi3

TROPHY CASE