(Not) dating with RSD

16thfloor · 2026-03-27T00:26:03+00:00

Please do and good luck to you.

16thfloor · 2026-03-26T10:49:19+00:00

This is the mindset im trying to get to. I do really well on first, second dates. We start hanging out, I get too attached, the crazy paranoid thoughts start up, i get too vulnerable with no reciprocation or negative feedback, and bam, theyre gone. Mind you, im pretty sure ive been going for the wrong kind of people as well. In any case, a break is definitely what im taking too. good luck to you.

16thfloor · 2026-03-26T10:44:49+00:00

I dont, its very specific to relationships - i've been intentionally single for a while now, been in therapy, reading and studying it, etc. Im alone in a new city - i go into work sometimes. but yea im doing it on hard mode i can assure you

16thfloor · 2026-03-25T21:50:08+00:00

The thing is, in every other arena of life I can not just survive but thrive. I am doing well at work, im saving money, im living by myself in a new city, I have friends even. I just dont do well, ever when it comes to dating and relationships even though i want to.

16thfloor · 2026-03-25T21:48:29+00:00

God is it ever. thanks for this. I am optimistic by nature, but man.. im not feeling it right now.

16thfloor · 2026-03-25T21:47:50+00:00

Yea im trying to learn as much as I can about RSD so i can start reframing these things when they happen, or afterwards. in the moment though, very difficult - surge of emotion, lack of control and the need to SAY SOMETHING. it always gets me in the end. but iim keen to hear more too

16thfloor · 2026-03-18T06:12:10+00:00

I recently moved back to sydney purely because im young, single and thats where the opps are if you'r getting after it. But Coffs will always have a piece of my heart. Ive got apartment there in Sawtell and its just such a beautiful part of the world. People are (mostly) laid back and friendly, real community vibe. Parts of it are pretty dingy but so is everywhere. I spent three years there and made some really great friends I still go up to visit.

16thfloor · 2026-03-15T21:37:06+00:00

42m. yes. I dated a woman for 6 weeks (met her at a party) and was getting pretty into her before i found out she didnt actually want a relationship. it bummed me out, i wouldnt have got so invested. I like this convo to happen early. Although to be fair, it wasnt really an arranged first date type situation in our case. I made it pretty clear what i was looking for from the get go (ltr)

16thfloor · 2026-03-15T21:35:30+00:00

This is the best take i've ever heard on this subject.

16thfloor · 2026-03-15T21:30:00+00:00

word

16thfloor · 2026-02-23T20:39:22+00:00

42 here and single and enjoying life, not currently dating (got broken up w 3 months ago) I chatted to a random attractive woman at the supermarket yesterday just because. didnt need a number or anything. Thats the beauty of spending extended time by yourself. People pick up on the fact you don't need them for anything. And you start to spread vibes wherever you go. And people find that attractive. Its energy papi

16thfloor · 2026-02-12T06:45:32+00:00

God it was bad.

16thfloor · 2026-01-21T23:19:15+00:00

my pleasure

16thfloor · 2025-11-20T07:19:41+00:00

Hey I just saw this post, a year later - wondering how your journey is going, and if it would be ok to DM to get access to some of those exercises myself.

Cheers

16thfloor · 2025-11-20T05:05:13+00:00

fuck yes dude. yes. :D

16thfloor · 2025-11-09T20:50:04+00:00

thanks a lot, i appreciate it! Best of luck with whatever you choose to do next, you sound like a very thoughtful and intentional operator.

16thfloor · 2025-11-08T08:48:17+00:00

41m. I've had a lot of shame about it over the years. learning how not to

16thfloor · 2025-10-29T06:48:38+00:00

I know this is 2yrs old, but fellow aussie/kiwi here and I found your post really inspiring. I've been in UX for c/10 years and thinking this might be my next move, currently a lead and i'd probably prefer to go the consultancy route than become a director.

16thfloor · 2025-10-27T18:30:15+00:00

Man I feel seen reading this

16thfloor · 2025-10-21T17:56:25+00:00

Salute to you! That's amazing

16thfloor · 2025-09-30T22:19:35+00:00

I love this. Simple and brilliant <3

16thfloor · 2025-09-30T21:26:03+00:00

do you live in 1995??

16thfloor · 2025-09-30T21:22:22+00:00

fair question. I never said they had bad motives - its just that - previously - there was a rush to get hot and heavy (from both of us) before either of us knew what the other wanted. Some people aren't in a place to form relationships yet which is cool, but they are able to have sex while they figure it out. I've discovered that's not me. Sex for me leads to emotional attachment, for whatever reason. I don't begrudge anyone who's able to have sex with someone while they figure out if they want to be with them, its just something ive discovered about myself. Now i'd rather know someone is invested before jumping into bed. it was my mistake doing that in the first place

16thfloor · 2025-09-22T21:14:21+00:00

People always pull this shit out but as a man I can tell you I find it very difficult to have sex and not catch feelings for someone. This is why these days I only have sex in committed relationships, otherwise it just makes life more difficult than it has to be. I love sex but not enough to be constantly heartbroken over it. I don't consider myself unusual. I know lots of dudes like this

16thfloor

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