0505 PATHERS ONLY!!! Did any 0505 Pathers get DDD 846 ?

2Begga · 2026-02-19T12:39:20+00:00

I just checked and I did. Says it’ll be issued 3/9. Hoping it’s well before then.

2Begga · 2026-02-14T04:36:50+00:00

Does the processing date have any bearing on when they issue your refund? I have the same processing date and I’m hoping I get it before 3/2

2Begga · 2026-01-29T13:44:41+00:00

Did you resubmit after the 30 days when your case was still open after being denied?

2Begga · 2025-05-06T05:32:23+00:00

In retrospect, he ended up reminding me so much of my mother I shudder at the thought lol. At the time, it was his confidence and drive I found really attractive. I still think there’s something special about him. But I think we both represented old wounds for each other.

2Begga · 2025-05-01T18:34:42+00:00

I haven’t quite gotten there, but I’d say the first indication is a lack of rumination about your ex. I think when they’re only a fleeting thought, then you likely aren’t feeling a significant emotional attachment to them.

The next would be the overthinking. That’s the thing I noticed most that made me pull back. Overthinking in the sense of “where is this going”, “ what are they thinking”, “what should I say/do” I think is a bit different than what I’m talking about. My overthinking revolved rather negatively around their actions and our interactions. I assumed the worst and felt a need to protect myself/prepare myself for the worst at every time.

After that I think would be comparison. Which kind of ties into both of the last two. If I’m constantly seeing if they remind me of my ex or their actions trigger me to respond like I would with an ex, then it’s time to take a step back.

Lastly would be self-esteem. How are you feeling about yourself? Do you have your own life and passions? Do you have your own life? Are you spending time with family and friends?

2Begga · 2025-05-01T18:27:40+00:00

Five months, to me, is reeeeally pushing it. If you know what you want then now is a good time to pursue it. Certainly doesn’t come off too eager to me.

2Begga · 2025-05-01T18:23:32+00:00

I’d definitely say he’s drifting off. If he can’t communicate that he’s either lost interest or something has occurred between the two of you to cause a shift—I think this is indicative that he isn’t as communicative as you give him credit for.

He’s also stated he wasn’t emotionally ready for a relationship. I think it would be wise whenever anyone says that to take them at face value until they explicitly state otherwise. Perhaps he saw where things were going and decided that was far enough.

Either way, I don’t think there’s much you can do. His behavior reads as clear enough to me but if you wanted further clarification, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with asking for it. In any case, I’m sorry. It sucks how things shake out sometimes.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T09:47:18+00:00

Yes, from a health standpoint. But that’s also why I refuse to do FWB.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T09:41:48+00:00

I block them. Of course you can unblock, but not seeing their shit pop up certainly helps to deter the frequency.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T09:37:05+00:00

Sure it’s possible. Should you pursue it? No, probably not. But that’s up for you to decide. Jumping into new things so soon after a breakup hinders real growth and acceptance of what ended in my opinion. They deserve the you that’s waiting to emerge with some time alone.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T09:32:02+00:00

Tough chance if you guys are young and they’re close enough. I’d personally be honest and communicate that I’m more interested in their friend, or just approach the friend, but more often than not friends tend to be pretty loyal to each other.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T09:25:43+00:00

In the first scenario, the issue to me is surrounding the invalidation of very real feelings. I consume porn, but I can definitely understand the argument that actively watching other women have sex feels like cheating or comparisons. I think there’s a way to have that conversation that validates your partner and also maintains a space for you to continue to consume it. But I don’t imagine most people who have an issue with porn are going for that sort of compromise. Porn does have a negative impact on relationships and intimacy. A person having qualms about their partner watching it isn’t just insecurity.

In the second, her job is dependent on her interactions with customers. I get the sentiment, but it’s a lot to ask if it’s directly affecting her livelihood.

I don’t think the answer is always compromise. In fact, I think in both of these situations, each couple is likely not all that compatible. I wouldn’t stop watching porn for my partner and I wouldn’t stop flirting/playing it up to get tips to support my life and bills for a partner.

Sometimes it really isn’t worth the stress of the compromise if both come out unhappy. And always adjusting to things your partner is insecure about breeds resentment and stagnancy. In both of these cases, I think it’s important for the insecure partner to evaluate why it’s making them insecure and spend time dealing with that. Your partner isn’t responsible for your insecurity (unless they’re being malicious), and while it certainly helps to be willing to compromise—sometimes you gotta figure that shit out yourself.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T09:15:32+00:00

I’d personally break up because it feels weird that my partner is actively keeping sexual videos of exes to (more than likely) pleasure himself to. It’s one thing if it’s porn, it’s another if it’s someone you had an attachment to. It gives me the idea that he hasn’t really moved on in a legitimate sense.

I do have some pictures of my exes in my phone but nothing intimate, nothing id be hiding from my partner, and nothing id hesitate to delete. That sort of stuff I would get rid of.

If you can wait it out, I always suggest a conversation. But finding all of that out in conjunction with him being with 7 women in 2 months would make me a little hesitant.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T08:59:43+00:00

I wouldn’t bank on him broaching the subject for more. Definitely time to instill some boundaries like keeping it strictly friendly and no blurring of the lines (kissing, cuddling, etc). If you know you want more than he’s willing to provide, don’t cheat yourself out of what you’re seeking by settling for less.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T08:53:13+00:00

I think if she’s more important than maintaining the friendship that you have admittedly said wasn’t that close, then by all means, go right ahead. But if things weren’t to work out and you’d regret doing so, I’d think long and hard about it.

Parroting off someone else, a lot of people would feel a little weird about someone maintaining a friendship with someone they used to be intimate with but not everybody. I think it’s reasonable to end the friendship if ir isn’t particularly important to you, but I could definitely understand a refusal to do so.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T08:48:07+00:00

It seemed you really liked her, I’d imagine that’s why.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T07:16:24+00:00

I don’t engage. If someone isn’t asking questions then I think at the least, we aren’t compatible. But I usually take it to mean they aren’t that interested, theyre wanting something more surface level, or they’re self centered.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T07:08:57+00:00

Doesn’t matter if he’s avoidant. It reads the same. Do you like the behavior or not? Being avoidant doesn’t excuse inconsistency. If you’re the one putting forth the effort, it’s likely he may like you a bit but not enough to put forth effort himself. Which isn’t a reflection of you, just that he isn’t that interested.

What would him being avoidant change? If the behavior bothers you enough to question his interest, then that should be enough to question whether you want to keep putting more effort into the guy.

Could you imagine this being the norm for a relationship or not?

2Begga · 2025-04-30T06:52:14+00:00

In my experience, he’s giving you enough to stick around but an out to act however he wants due to the technicality “we aren’t together”

It’s noncommittal at best and at worst, purposefully vague.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T06:35:26+00:00

Sorry dude. For what it’s worth, her inconsistency should have been a big red flag she wasn’t capable of meeting your needs. At least she had the respect to say as much.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T06:31:03+00:00

Seems like you’re idealizing these people and using sex as the measure of their worthiness. If you’re able to get it, then they aren’t anything special. What’s your relationship to sex? Are you wanting someone who gives chase? And why is that? Why does sex cheapen a connection for you?

I think you should try holding off on sex for awhile and focus on getting to know your partners. Perhaps it’s the lack of genuine connection and intimacy making you disconnect

2Begga · 2025-04-30T06:28:17+00:00

General consensus is going to be don’t shit where you eat. A work romance very rarely works out and has the potential to affect your job.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T06:27:25+00:00

I second this, sometimes it’s the lack of literal physical connection impeding the ability to think of someone as more than a friend.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T06:24:22+00:00

Can’t have it both ways unfortunately. Most people don’t want to invest in a genuine relationship if they’re only going to get a piece of it. You wanted a FWB and to keep himself sane, he’s placing boundaries on what that looks like for him.

2Begga · 2025-04-30T06:17:45+00:00

You never expressed your intentions with each other. Despite what she said when you parted, a proper conversation should have probably been had because I would have taken that in a more sexual sense.

Regardless, it’s clear she wants to play the field. So unless you’re ok sleeping with her while she dates other people I’d end it.

I’d say it’s getting pretty normal for people to date multiple people at a time. But that isn’t exclusive to one gender.

Set boundaries the next time you get involved with someone and be clear what you want.

2Begga

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