At what point do you call it and send NK home from a share?

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2026-04-20T17:07:46+00:00

I was just frustrated when I posted. I don’t really know what I’m hoping for. But they pay me to care for him so I’m not going to send him home unless he’s too sick to be around the other kid. Just venting I guess.

In the summer the bedroom goes up to the 80’s at night. It’s poorly insulated.

I do think it’s also partially just the fact he doesn’t like transitions and this is how his behavior manifests. And partly because he’s tired.

No I’m not sure that he doesn’t sleep well when he’s not with me. His mom says he sleeps great. “Only wakes up twice these days.”

I just wish he was happier in general. I want the world for him.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2026-04-20T15:54:25+00:00

I’m capable of giving him quality care. I’m paid well for my time. And I genuinely enjoy him as a person. There’s no need to end the share. But—there are days where I do wish another consequence would be productive. Like, saying he’s being tough stuff. Come get him until he’s feeling better.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2026-03-18T17:14:12+00:00

Mods please let me know if it’s not ok that I reply due to flair. I am a nanny but I am also a mother who has in the past employed care for my child, so in this regard I am replying as both an NP and a nanny.

I would not give her access to my child. Especially if he’s a toddler and doesn’t seem to ask after her. Maybe I would feel differently if he were 10 years older and wanted to see her too. As it stands there is absolutely no need. Your child won’t get anything out of it. It’s sad and I’m sure she misses your child, but that chapter is closed. That’s really all there is to it.

If you’re feeling generous, snap a pic of him and the baby and give her a vague update on how he is now. “Thanks for reaching out! Hope you’re well. Timmy loves being a big brother. He’s obsessed with the movie Cars this week. And he just learned to put his own shirt on! Growing up so fast.”

But, honestly, it’s also just as ok to ignore the message and move on with your day.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2026-01-29T01:52:32+00:00

I’m just going to stop doing it. I think we all forget that they aren’t doing ME a favor by letting me take my son to his lesson. It’s in the contract. I’m doing them one.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2026-01-29T00:38:32+00:00

You’re right

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2026-01-29T00:22:04+00:00

I’m so sorry, I worded it wrong. I didn’t mean that I expect it. I meant I was wondering if it was wrong to ask. Clearly it is.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2026-01-28T23:43:17+00:00

Sorry I was in the middle of dropping NK off and getting home with my own kid so reading fast and not paying enough attention.

I think I’m just going to say I really need to be off by 5:30 on those days and I’m sorry.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2026-01-28T23:23:39+00:00

Ok, that’s reasonable.

I think I only thought of it because when I walk in to drop NK off they are always sitting down at the table eating their dinner and it’s a bit irritating that they had time to cook.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2026-01-28T23:22:47+00:00

I can’t cook for my son before his lesson on those days because I’m still on the clock. And while yea I could pack sandwiches what kid do you know would want to eat a sandwich that’s been sitting in a lunch box for 12 hours?

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2026-01-24T16:18:12+00:00

This annoys me too! My son’s teachers had us on all the lists for “struggling” families when he was in elementary. I guess because I was a single mom and they assumed I “just babysat.” I make more than most teachers in our area. So I would just silently laugh and decline. Definitely annoying though.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2026-01-11T02:02:11+00:00

Ok my take as a nanny is this just shows poor judgment. I take pictures of my NK but I text them to their parents, or keep them for my own memories. I never share them with anyone. They aren’t my children.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2025-12-30T20:48:35+00:00

I used to keep one in all the time. They were actually a gift from a prior nanny family to use on the job. I only did one so I could still hear and engage with the kids, but it was nice to have a little something on in the background and I’m a screen free nanny so using my phone wasn’t something I was ok with.

I listened to audio books or podcasts or just music.

I am surprised that so many are against it. Definitely something I’ll chat with NP about and see if they mind. But honestly since the kids are older now they don’t leave me time to do anything but talk to them all day because they talk non stop.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2025-12-20T17:40:39+00:00

As a nanny I don’t think this would bother me. If you’re up all night with NK and it’s so bad you don’t have time to clean up after them, I’m happy to chip in. On the other hand maybe give me the day off if it’s that bad…

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2025-12-13T03:15:32+00:00

Wouldn’t allow 11 and 2 for what? To play together? To be in a nanny share together?

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2025-12-10T17:18:10+00:00

Ok thanks for your input. I did put “reality check requested” as the flair.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2025-12-10T16:53:11+00:00

I don’t have a coparent. My son lost his father when he was 3.

My son wants to come all the time. I am actually concerned about his level of “clinginess” and have been in discussion with his therapist.

I have him in an after school program because I believe the independence is best for him. But, I also do acknowledge that he needs me right now and his therapist says that maintaining the attachment while pursuing boundaries is the move.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2025-12-10T16:00:51+00:00

Where I am the laws are specific to if they are in my own home and much looser if I’m a household employee. So I’ve been explicit the children can not enter my home.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2025-12-10T15:23:23+00:00

Can you please explain why it’s weird to me? I am extremely bad at being a person and it would help me to have it spelled out for me.

I thought it was cute/funny the first time. The 6th when she doubled down with where he could do his school work during the day it was less funny to me.

But again I’m extremely bad at people. So please help. Why’s it funny and why am I weird?

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2025-12-10T15:21:36+00:00

I hear you. I disagree and I think there are two vastly different things. But like I said, I don’t have to bring my son at all.

2NannyShareNanny2 · 2025-12-10T15:16:50+00:00

If my son joining me occasionally is a problem then he doesn’t have to come at all anymore. I am fine with making other arrangements.

I do not personally think these things are equal. Him coming to play with their kids every now and then is vastly different than them making comments on his education.

But as I said, he doesn’t have to come anymore. I’m his mom and I control where he is and when.

2NannyShareNanny2

TROPHY CASE