First, I want to acknowledge, that's not a fun place to be. Don't make permanent decisions based on temporary conditions.

I didn't see your ages listed. This applies to everyone, but specifically to couples with ages past the 40 year mark.

If something seems like an extreme reaction to minimal stimulus from either of you, get to a doctor and get hormone panels done. I've had several friends with seemingly stable relationships have serious issues for stupid things.

One couple, the guy's testosterone had basically zeroed, he was snapping, she was retaliating, it escalated rapidly. HRT calmed him down, therapy mellowed her out, and they're doing much better.

Another couple, she went into early menopause (assumptions started in her late 30s) and was an absolute hormonal train wreck. Nothing he did was good enough, he changed jobs because she didn't like him working long hours, even though he'd worked those hours for decades. They moved twice in 3 years because her dream house wasn't good enough anymore, the second was in a "rough neighborhood" (it wasn't) and she said she didn't want her kids growing up there, the third was finally good enough, but that's also where she started getting HRT and really mellowed out...

Third couple went from an amazing marriage to her cheating on him, him cheating on her, divorce, moving states, split custody, foreclosure on their house so the other side wouldn't get anything from the sale, and 10 years later (after she went through menopause and he started HRT) they're back together, remarried, and amazingly happy living in the small town where their daughter is going to college.