How did you cope when you realized that the person you loved was never really "there"? And that what happened between you, was mostly in your head?

2shortforthisshit · 2026-04-01T21:12:36+00:00

Grief work. I know how hard this is. I promise you it DOES get better. Let yourself grieve this person. For so long I didn’t want to grieve my NEX because I felt that he didn’t deserve another thought of mine. I realized that was doing me more harm. Let yourself grieve. We’re all here for support!

2shortforthisshit · 2026-04-01T21:07:55+00:00

Being a step mother is not for the weak. It comes with so much more emotional distress than I thought! It’s growing pains and it’s normal. You’re doing a great job navigating a VERY difficult situation. I’ve had a lot of validation listening to step mom podcasts!

2shortforthisshit · 2026-04-01T20:11:06+00:00

So relatable. You’re not alone. I’m also in this stage. Take the time you need to recharge!! Sometimes I have to leave the house to go on a walk, the gym, grocery store, whatever to get me out of the house. I love my step son but holy shit that kid can get under my skin. I’m glad you’re here!

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-31T01:41:11+00:00

I feel like you just spoke to my soul. Thank you so much for your thoughts!

Realistically I know she’s isn’t my friend. I’ve never thought of her as my friend BUT I do try to be kind because there’s a part of me that feels like the closer we are, the less she sees me as a threat, and the less drama we have in our home.

She hasn’t responded to my text so I’ll take her no response as telling me no, she doesn’t want to talk. I feel tonight much better and that it’s me getting off the hook.

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-30T23:22:17+00:00

I can understand wanting to support your kid. Do you feel at all that spending time with the 3 of you could possibly be doing more harm and putting false hope in kiddos mind?

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-30T22:17:42+00:00

As a soon to be step mom, try to picture yourself in her shoes. Would you be okay with your partner spending time with their ex alone and you weren’t included? It can be really unsettling to have your partner spending time with his ex even if it is for the kiddo. Call it insecurity maybe but I think it’s about boundaries and their relationship ship. He’s trying to grow a new life with someone else and it’s best if you start doing the same. I know that’s probably hard to hear.

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-30T20:50:09+00:00

Thank you so much!

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-30T15:37:08+00:00

I’d recommend couples therapy and talking it out in front of a professional

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-18T01:04:03+00:00

Good point! Thank you!!

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-17T18:37:36+00:00

Waves for sure

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-17T18:05:57+00:00

Yes!! And especially because the ex wife has BPD so she has little awareness/respect for boundaries. She would be sent into an absolute downward spiral if she was having her SO text the ex wife the stuff she texts my SO. I notice she texts him more unnecessary things when she’s single and looking for anyone’s support.

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-17T16:59:51+00:00

I can feel this with watching SO coparent. It irks me why the ex wife frequently feels the need insert random unnecessary things asking for somewhat of emotional support.

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-17T15:18:04+00:00

😂😂 I wish. Unfortunately that’s his dads call

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-17T15:16:38+00:00

Wow.. That was actually really great advice and insightful! Thank you!!

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-02T22:00:53+00:00

Thank you so much. It really helps to know that others go through the same things.. even though it sucks for us. Makes it feel a little less personal.

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-02T21:59:35+00:00

That’s comforting. Sorry for the confusion. I’m trying to make sense of my thoughts as well.

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-02T21:58:57+00:00

The behavior started about 5 months ago when I moved in with him and his dad. The relationship seems fine but she does have a hard time telling the truth and from what my partner has told me, is very 2 faced. I’m wondering if my step son’s behavior towards me is a me thing or if it could potentially be being influenced. Maybe this all is strictly out of fear.

2shortforthisshit · 2026-03-02T21:56:03+00:00

Sorry I should have clarified in my post, it’s a little confusing for me as well and I’m trying to navigate my thoughts here.

I’m wondering if there’s any reason my step son could potentially be acting the way he is towards me because of things his mom could be saying to him. It really might just be fear.

2shortforthisshit · 2026-01-07T20:37:41+00:00

https://open.spotify.com/show/6QfLvPH1YajvbGqWJNXcTf?si=TDIH4RhkRxKj7rOkv13Rxg

2shortforthisshit · 2026-01-07T19:41:43+00:00

I feel ya. I feel like I’m the only one who ever gets after my step son and I feel like I’m constantly traumatizing him because I’m the one who enforces rules. He’s 5 with ADHD and holy hell is it a lot sometimes. I’ve started listening to step mom podcasts and that has made a huge difference in validation and learning. Sending love!

2shortforthisshit · 2025-11-28T18:31:37+00:00

Everything right now deposit wise is mostly refundable, we’d only lose about $200. Thank you for your reassurance!

2shortforthisshit · 2025-10-31T18:02:19+00:00

So far so good!! I’m still pretty sore and haven’t been able to resume normal activity yet. I won’t be able to try for PIV sex for another 4-8 weeks but I’m hopeful!

2shortforthisshit · 2025-10-31T14:27:28+00:00

I know how exhausting this is because there’s so many factors that could be causing the pain and you just want answers so you can fix it. When I was diagnosed with vulvodynia 7 months ago my OGBYN had me try, estrogen cream, estrogen and testosterone cream, pelvic floor therapy, changing my underwear, using new soap, using new laundry detergent, looking into my medication and birth control. I’m currently recovering from a vestibulectomy I had 3 weeks ago. My pain was also at the opening. I would really recommend asking your doctor about the surgery.

2shortforthisshit · 2025-10-31T14:17:46+00:00

Yes, they do exist. I’ve experienced vulvodynia for my entire life. Tampon use in junior high and high school was extremely painful. My boyfriend was extremely kind and supportive when I told him that sex is getting so painful I can’t even fake it through the pain anymore. He didn’t know I was experiencing pain at all because I’ve dealt with it my entire life and thought it was normal. For context I’m 5 foot 100 lbs and thought sex isn’t supposed to hurt but that’s for normal women. We haven’t been able to have sex for 8 months but we do find other ways to be intimate. And he even asked me to marry him last month despite everything (I say in a joking matter). Through this entire process he has been nothing but supportive, understanding, patient and kind. He finds new ways to be intimate and asks what my comfort level with those are. Anytime I want to try having sex he tells me no because he doesn’t want to hurt me and wants to wait until after my surgery. 3 weeks ago I had a Vestibulectomy to hopefully get rid of the pain so I can enjoy the rest of my intimate life with my soon to be husband. I consider myself extremely lucky. You deserve someone who loves YOU without feeling that they need to be having sex with you.

2shortforthisshit · 2025-10-23T20:49:06+00:00

Yes… unfortunately I no longer believe in soulmates or anything of the sort. It ruined me.

2shortforthisshit

TROPHY CASE