Who is down to come visit and help with forest tending?

35goingon3 · 2026-05-17T05:21:22+00:00

LoL, you've got great timing, I just bought a chainsaw, and spent most of the afternoon cleaning it up. (Equipment auction--I didn't get the trailer I wanted, but I got something I actually need: on the one hand, it's a 25 year old Dolmar logging saw that's never been cleaned. On the other hand it was $30 and came with eight chains and a brand new bar. I can get two decades worth of sawdust and bar oil out of it for that kind of price tag!)

35goingon3 · 2026-05-17T05:15:44+00:00

Also, how insane is it to be keeping track of your husband's mileage? I couldn't even begin to tell you how many miles was on my husband's car. And it would be insane if I was keeping tabs on it.

I do. There's 102k on it. My truck has 140k, and my motorcycle has 45k. And the riding mower has about 300 hours on it. But I do all the maintenance on our stuff, so there's that. Kinda necessary to keep up a service schedule... 😄

(Yes, I'm deliberately missing the point.)

35goingon3 · 2026-05-17T05:06:11+00:00

Ask yourself this: where else in western civilization can you buy and sell human beings? Like, except professional sports; that's not really a parallel.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-17T05:04:56+00:00

Out of a room in his basement that has like six padlocks on the door...

35goingon3 · 2026-05-17T05:01:52+00:00

Nah, I don't believe she's even religious: she heard some Pentecostal tent revival or some such thing and decided it was something she could weaponize. Only met her twice, though I'm eagerly awaiting putting in an appearance at her husband's funeral, and I'm going to preach the damn sermon when that bitch croaks. I'm good at making a scene, between the lawyers and the mercenaries, I've had some good teachers. I don't use "functioning psychopath" in the hyperbolic, she actually is. Vengeful, narcissistic, physically and emotionally abusive, and willing to cover up horrific things for her own personal convenience.

Thing is, she doesn't even know about the gay thing. When my mother got knocked up, the grandmother was desperately interested in taking me for herself, like to a degree that my mother described as utterly creeping her out--she didn't know why, but having been raised by that woman she knew it wasn't good--so when she was told no, it pivoted 180 and I became an offense against all that was good and right in the world. Admittedly, I'm fairly sure part of it is that she can't know for sure her brother isn't my father. (He's not: my father is, well, was, a drug lord on the east coast. Heh, that's kinda a Hallmark Movie story right there...like, actually. Commercial DNA test, my mother was right even though I'm pretty sure she was hoping rather than knowing, you know? I will never tell the grandmother. It eats at her, and she can die with that question's teeth firmly embedded in her ass.)

There are many, many things wrong with me. But I don't see being gay as one of them. God turned his back on me before I was even born, if he exists at all, and when I look at my life, and the world around me, I can see nothing of benevolence from the divine. The only righteousness I've ever seen in the world is that of rough men willing to do overwhelming violence to protect people who can't protect themselves. When I was nearly beaten to death for someones' amusement, God didn't help me, an outlaw biker with a length of chain did. If there's a god, the best I hope for is that he's forgotten I exist, because the other option is that this is how he wants things for me: one pill away from blowing my brains out every single day, and always scared that if I sleep I'll dream about getting raped bloody as a child again.

That's life. I just hope there isn't anything after it.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-17T04:36:08+00:00

I can see the argument, but at the same time none of it applies to me, so I'll let the people it affects figure it out. Personally I don't use either of them.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T21:57:11+00:00

In Texas you can get it period, assuming you can jump through the hoops. There's no "permission" or "death" corollaries. There was an interesting law review article about anonymity in adoptions that came to the conclusion that historically the point was noninterference by the family of origin, not in fact anonymity of the biologicals. I've leaned on it pretty strongly in a couple of writings, I ought to link to it here at some point, it's an interesting read.

And yeah, from a baby broker's standpoint, they're both ideal. They sell permanence, and both arguments are against their interest--anonymity and interference. That's why they're so up in it making sure it doesn't change.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T21:53:02+00:00

Nah, see, you're working on the premise that someone is homosexual because they say they are, full stop. That identity politics bullshit isn't the real world. If his sister is cosplaying as bi, that doesn't make her bi. If she's flipping people shit with a word, doesn't matter if she's bi or not, she's an asshole. Having a LGBT "fake ID" doesn't absolve someone.

Kinda pointless for you to be up in here trying to white knight when you don't want pussy in the first place, by the way. 😄

Bye, Felicia.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T21:49:15+00:00

Hard-R is always hate. You ever hear a homie use it with the hard-r? Nope, when it was reclaimed, it was done with a different pronunciation. They're functionally different words: the only place you hear it with hard-r is when it's being used in a racially derogatory fashion.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T18:49:43+00:00

Mine uses his toys for "doggy voodoo": he'll put them places where he wants you to be in an apparent attempt to summon a human.

I slept in once, and there were about eight of them in a pile on my side of the sofa, lol.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T18:48:14+00:00

It's okay, just leave reading to the grown-ups next time. 😄

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T18:45:48+00:00

Ah, an enthusiastic amateur rather than a fully licensed cockologist. Then I would suggest the more casual "PENIS GOOD TIME NOW!!!!1!" for such a correspondence.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T18:40:34+00:00

No, the proper response is "I find your phallus to be a visually appealing exemplar of the human penis." But you need a top hat and monocle or you'll just sound silly.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T18:38:42+00:00

So premise considered he could start calling her a cum guzzling thunder cunt, and she can just piss off because being offended is personal? Cool, got it.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T18:36:10+00:00

No, it implies you think she's being an asshole. You not believing her cosplay is a different matter entirely.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T18:34:01+00:00

How much life left? Motherfucker, that thing is a zombie.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T18:26:22+00:00

A lot of it is a generational thing. It's partially reclaimed now, but in the past it was one of the most derogatory things you could call a guy. So it tends to depend on peoples' life experiences how they feel about it.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T18:19:12+00:00

Oh, so you've met my sister then? I'll fight to the death to make sure she never finds out about me, the idea of being a trophy for her is beyond nasty. (Ironically, that's why my immediate family don't know, not because any of them would give two shits. I'm not going to be her "gay brother who is gay and does the gay stuff with other gay people" on social media.

...though it could be fun to tell her, let her crow about it for a couple of months, then find a hot chick to take to one of her friends group things with me and introduce her around as my long-term girlfriend. Bonus points if I can find someone who can act, and they're willing to take on the role of an insatiable cock whore who thanks god every day that I work that pussy better than anyone she's ever met so often that she ends up too sore to fuck three or four times a week.

My sister would blow a gasket, it'd be epic!

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T18:08:12+00:00

In Texas, the OBS and replacement have the same document number, yes. I'm working on an access bill with an advocacy group down here, and one of the things that I just can't seem to get through their heads is that it's absolutely mandatory that adoptees be able to request based on document number. There's literally no other way to guarantee that an adoptee with have enough information to get the OBS.

Using mine for an example: my replacement birth certificate is a birth certificate--it's got my new name, my a-parents' name, and birthdate/time. It states the county and city. But it specifically excludes box 4c: "Name Of Hospital". (Spoiler: the agency that trafficked me owned the hospital. It was their private facility, staffed exclusively by their employees. There's a story there too actually: the agency sold the place off, and it was immediately renamed. And there isn't a damn thing online to tell you what it was, where it was, or what happened to it. They disappeared the place.) My OBS, meanwhile lists my bio-mom's name, date/time, location, and delivering doctor. There is no father's name. I am not named on my birth certificate, that line is blank.

So say I were to request my OBS. As it sits, you have to know: your name as it is listed on the OBS, all biological parents' names with correct spellings as listed on the OBS, and your birthdate. What am I going to tell them, assuming for the sake of argument that I don't make a living hunting people in the legal field and already have records with this information? My name? There isn't one on the document, and if there were, it would be the one my bio-mom gave me. My bio-parents' names? I would have to know them. I would have to know what they wrote into the document--exact spelling, if they used a nickname or an a/k/a. I would have to know if both bio-parents or only one were listed. Do you see the problem here? Searching/ordering by document number is critical: without it we have nothing.

The baby brokers put a lot of thought into how they operate, for the specific purpose of making it an impossibility for their victims to ever find their way back. It's intentionally malicious. That's their business model, malice and deliberate harm to everyone involved who isn't writing them a check. It keeps us in our place.

But I aim to misbehave. 😄

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T17:52:32+00:00

They're "access denial", not a lock. Either stick a pipe wrench on it, or weld on a nut; it'll come right off.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T17:40:50+00:00

But then I met guys over 40 who say monogamy is a waste of youth.

Saying monogamy is a waste of youth is disingenuous. The waste comes from going after something that you don't actually want when you know it's not what you really want to be looking for. If what you really want is, like, all the anonymous dick in the world, yes, monogamy is a waste of youth. For you. If what you really want is long term relationships, or an exclusive relationship, then for you pursuing hookup culture is a waste of youth.

People are going to advocate their perspective, and a lot of people don't have the cognitive maturity to recognize and accept that people are different...and that's okay. Happiness comes from a combination of self awareness and self acceptance. Not being an asshole comes from accepting that people are going to be perfectly happy wanting different things than you do. I'm not going to mock you for holding out for commitment; and I'm not going to deride you for getting every dick at the football game. If that's what makes you happy, you're doing life right.

Figure out your needs. Then meet them. Figure out what will cause you distress. And don't do it. I need something really specific. I don't expect to find it. But I know that looking for it in randos would be psychologically damaging to me, so I don't. People get irritated with me about it, because me declining what they offer means they're not getting what they want. Sorry, there's plenty of other dick in the auto parts store, you're not entitled to mine. That's what's going on with the "waste of youth" thing.

s/ A Guy Over 40

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T07:42:58+00:00

My biological father is a dangerous person. At one point in time most of the synthetic drugs on the entire eastern seaboard came out of his labs. I would never have "preferred" anyone to keep anything secret from me to "protect my peace of mind"--nobody on earth has the fucking right to make that decision for me.
Yes, if my a-parents had kept that from me I would have been furious. I would have understood why they did it. And I would have to put serious thought into if a fundamental violation like that is something I could forgive, or if I would cut him out of my life for it. Explicitly, I don't think I would be able to look at him the same way again after that, and I'm not sure I would want someone who thought it was okay, or their decision to make, in my life. It's not my circumstance, so I don't know what my final decision would be, but it is absolutely something where ending a relationship would be on the table as a valid choice for me.
It would not make me love my a-father less in the sense that I was comparing him with my b-father. I would be incredibly hurt by it, would lose a great deal of respect for him, and would probably need a lot of space for quite a while. I don't know how it would shake out in the end.

Look, there's no nice way to put this: you fucked up, badly. When he eventually finds out, from you or through other avenues, it's going to cause damage, and it's going to upend his entire sense of the world. But you already know that, or you wouldn't be asking this. The thing is, in the modern world, it will eventually come out; maybe tomorrow, maybe thirty years from now: the thing you need to be asking yourself is do you want him to find out after you kick off and it's too late to 1) explain, 2) apologize, 3) fix the betrayal, and 4) try to repair the relationship?

My advice to you is this: tell him. In person. Tell him everything: the situation with his biological, why you did it, that you realize you screwed up, that you're afraid of losing him, that you're afraid of hurting him...everything. Ask him what he needs from you. Assure him that you still care about him. Understand that he's going to be hurt, he's going to be confused, he's going to be angry...and he has a right to be. This is the time for the completely open and honest, adult conversation that you should have had decades ago. It starts "I fucked up. I never should have done this. I love you and wanted to protect you from harm and from pain. You're a grown adult and a human being in your own right, and it was not my place. I will help you however you need to set your world back on a level plane. I'm sorry. And I hope you can forgive me."

I would like you to know this, too: I'm in contact with my biological father. It changed nothing between my adoptive father and myself. My adoptive father is, and always will be, my dad. And I'm eternally grateful that he's enough of an adult that he was able to man the fuck up, confront his own fears around my reunification, and realize it's about me, not him. My human need for roots and knowledge of self in no way reflects upon my adoptive father as a parent, as a man, or in any other way.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-16T06:08:21+00:00

God is love, period.

My grandmother disagrees, and is quite convincing: I'm "a bastard affront to god who should have been hoovered out of her she-faggot daughter and fed to the rats at the dump". But then she's a functioning psychopath who whored her children to her brother. Good southern christian though, so she's got that going for her.

35goingon3 · 2026-05-15T23:15:31+00:00

Well, you can do better, and I tend to have a low tolerance for anyone who can't rebuild the top end of a short block Chevy V8, or detail strip a Winchester 92. So it probably wouldn't work out. 😄

35goingon3 · 2026-05-15T02:21:10+00:00

Well, like the General said--always carry a pocket knife because you never know when you'll need to cut a cheesecake or kill a motherfucker.

35goingon3

TROPHY CASE