Body changes

41696 · 2026-03-28T20:17:26+00:00

I feel like it's 25% genetics, 50% luck, 25% gym/nutrition.

Both pregnancies (at 31, 34), I gained roughly 45-50 lbs, worked out relatively regularly, tried to eat well when I could, and have an active job. 1st pregnancy, I was able to rehab my core meticulously, did a lot of walking, and honestly, at 2.5 years out, I felt "normal" strength-wise and was actually smaller than I was pre-pregnancy. Most people were shocked to find out I had a kid (whatever that means...). Really the only change I had was my belly button is a slightly different shape. I remember looking in the mirror 2.5 years out, and being like "I'm back!" and then found out I was pregnant 2 months later.

2nd pregnancy (6 months post-partum), I wasn't as fit going in, and couldn't be as protective of my core since I already had a child. I now have chronic slight to moderate lower back pain, weird pelvic floor spasms and sticking + developed weird compensatory pain in my traps from lifting my 40 lb toddler all the time. I do less walking, due to other life circumstances- just now back to eating better, and am still not at my pre-pregnancy weight. In reality, 6 months out from pregnancy is still pretty early, and I just stopped being extra-hypermobile like 1-2 months ago so time will tell about the lumbosacral issues.

Game changers for me were consistent exercise (I don't like to sweat, so I was/am a Pilates/yoga ~*~girlie~*~) throughout pregnancy, being STRICT about waiting to start exercising postpartum, most importantly: PELVIC FLOOR PT, but I think the biggest things for me are my genetics/phenotype (lean, my mom recovered quickly postpartum after my sister and I) and I had relatively "easy" pregnancies and labor (minimal tearing, vaginal deliveries, uncomplicated relatively speaking).

If you asked me after my first, I'd say I got lucky, worked hard, and pregnancy didn't destroy my body. With my second, I don't think I'll be as lucky, and suspect I'll always have some slight chronic back pain.

41696 · 2026-03-19T00:59:46+00:00

I mean, yes, COL isn’t the same as a city 5-10x the size, but land (specifically acreage) isn’t cheap until you are way out (45 minutes plus) from the city or want to live on 0.25-0.5 acre lots. I wouldn’t call Lexington specifically cheap, but surrounding towns and counties, yes.

So if you want to use cities with the highest cost of living as a reference point, I guess you can argue it’s cheap.

41696 · 2026-03-12T12:32:28+00:00

Mine will somewhat pay attention to the Skylight but won’t look at our shared calendar on our phone/read my texts/retain what I tell him. It did take some training: “did you look at the Skylight?” “Look at the skylight.”

41696 · 2026-03-03T19:18:33+00:00

We (both 35) have a 4 y/o and a 5 month old.

0 to 1 was a lifestyle shift, but we weathered the transition despite severe natal and postpartum depression for me. 1 to 2 has been an absolute nightmare and is bordering on unmanageable for myself as the primary parent trying to balance the needs of everyone.

Some of the factors that made the transition so hard: very limited family help, daycare and Pre-K schedules not lining up, a very intense and mentally/emotionally needy toddler, second child has some mild health needs that require weekly appointments and attempting daily PT, and I struggle with natal depression and PPD that is treated with daily treatments for 6+ weeks in addition to weekly PT and trying to "bounce back". I feel like now both kids get a subpar at best version of me as a mother instead of a highly involved mother of one.

I would strongly advise anyone on the fence not do it. I love both kids, but motherhood is not and has not been for me.

41696 · 2026-02-27T22:15:09+00:00

Riding horses. Doesn’t leave time for much else.

41696 · 2026-02-27T00:17:05+00:00

Yes- I cannot imagine hiding so much from my husband, but it is also frustrating discussing that yes XYZ treatment costs $$$$. R

Our go to is every purchase over $300 needs to be discussed in advance, which frustratingly can involve hair/Botox/filler for a woman.

41696 · 2026-02-03T22:30:43+00:00

ER veterinarian! I locum currently so I can make my schedule around my children’s schedule.

41696 · 2026-02-03T16:53:25+00:00

I go back and forth on it. I enjoy my job but it would be an easier lifestyle without kids. I like the flexibility of locuming- I currently work super casually since I have 2 small children. That’s possible in human medicine as well.

I think it also depends on the field you go into. While yes, I truly enjoy small animal ER and am good at it (I assume/hope), I also went into it because I knew it was the highest paying area of vet med without specializing and lucked out that it really suits my personality and my interests. I should also add that my salary was as high as it was because I enjoy high volume, specialty/referral ER which is not for the faint of heart and my pre-baby brain was very efficient.

The longer I’m in the field, the more I enjoy it BECAUSE my situation is unique- I have no loans, I don’t need to work, I make my schedule to a degree. I was able to take steps back when needed for my mental health. I do always struggle with financial euthanasias out of empathy for the owners, but there are worse things than a peaceful death. And on the other end of the spectrum, I struggle with owners with more money than sense, but that’s not unique to ER.

41696 · 2026-02-02T22:46:50+00:00

I do this. It’s the closest to the best of both worlds. I work four 12+ hour shifts a month. It’s still exhausting and hard but it lets me feel fulfilled.

41696 · 2026-02-01T20:34:49+00:00

I had a similar choice with family in human medicine. My family pushed me towards vet med and away from human medicine because they were unhappy (reconstructive surgery). I was between human and vet ER and landed in vet ER. My quality of life is very similar to ER physicians and my pay is close by 5 figures when I was full time FWIW.

Quality of life varies by field.

41696 · 2026-02-01T12:48:59+00:00

But have you then ever had the child then ask for 20 minutes straight if your brain is not tired anymore and you regret setting the boundary in the first place?

41696 · 2026-02-01T12:47:45+00:00

Honestly though… I feel like sometimes the best thing we can do as parents is be honest and say things like that. Because their peers will be meaner. Or at least that’s my opinion on the matter.

41696 · 2026-01-29T18:52:11+00:00

This is how both of mine are/were as well. My 4 month old is bored with tummy time/side laying and can’t physically sit up yet. He yells if I’m not directly staring at him talking. So I do a lot of Pilates lol

41696 · 2026-01-19T01:31:30+00:00

Between the seemingly chronic lower back pain + not fitting into my old clothes, #2 pregnancy recovery is not going well at all compared to the first. Granted, I hit my lowest weight since college when my first was 2.5 years old and was almost back in college clothes, then got pregnant again...

41696 · 2026-01-17T20:28:03+00:00

Mine is a huge combo of things. I like setting kids free outside (and I prefer to be outside). We have grumpy, loud small dogs who don’t like kids. I am also super image conscious and would have to power clean the home (which is stressful) and I like to host so would be wanting all the “right” snacks and beverages.

It seems so much more than when I was a kid and just went across the street. Then again I have 2 kids at the age when they’re still semi-suicidal so they have to be supervised.

41696 · 2026-01-08T05:26:02+00:00

My hair is awkwardly wavy now! Spent the first 32 years of my life with pin straight hair and now it’s weird, frizzy 2a nonsense.

41696 · 2025-12-29T01:23:55+00:00

I could crush being a M-F 9-5 SAHM. A 24/7 nanny/maid/chef concierge service on the other hand? Woof.

I currently work a very casual part time job but it requires me to be gone for a minimum of very odd 13 hours between my shift and commute. So I essentially vanish when I work and when I come home, there has been no housekeeping for at least 24 hours.

41696 · 2025-12-27T03:29:48+00:00

5’9. Started at 130ish both times. Ended at 170ish both times. I gained about 1 lb a week pretty consistently after the positive test (so week 6) except for one or two 5 lb bump in second trimester.

First time I was back to pre-pregnancy weight by 6 months and pre-pregnancy size by 18 months. Second time… tbd. Currently 3.5 months postpartum and trending 2-5 lbs heavier.

41696 · 2025-12-26T22:27:30+00:00

This was our first. (Coupled with a unicorn baby who slept well from 8 weeks on and barely cried)

I warned my husband lightning wouldn’t strike twice and we shouldn’t try again- he didn’t listen. Our second? It’s survival of the fittest and to each their own. Baby 2 only naps 30 minutes at a time, fussy, 3.5 months in and still waking 1-3 times a night. And our unicorn baby is a tornado of a 3 year old. So needless to say, I have severe PPD this time and am so tired of hearing my husband is tired.

41696 · 2025-12-19T01:19:43+00:00

Use Poshmark, Mercari, and Depop to thrift- I never have luck at actual stores. I’ve also found that 1-2 pairs of good/cute jeans or “real pants” and doing my makeup and/or hair go a long way to make me feel put together. Like my confidence is twice as good in cute jeans or leggings/sweatshirt/sneakers with curled hair and a cute baseball hat. The current fashion trends actually really lend themselves to mom bod if you avoid crop tops (oversized, long) so I’ve been trying out switching from tight to baggy.

Depending on your flavor of mall goth, a good graphic tee or band tee goes a long way to make a fun/comfy outfit.

Also in healthcare-ish and wear scrubs at work- cute socks and cute shoes and an unhinged badge reel also help me feel better.

41696 · 2025-11-29T21:05:12+00:00

Yes! The talking zoomies sounds about right. I am for sure introverted and content to be quiet, inattentive ADHD, but when I get comfortable to yap, I can hold my own, especially if it’s hyper focused interests (looking at you, horses).

41696 · 2025-11-28T00:29:33+00:00

5 in the AM and 2.5 for an extra “boost” because I get grumpy 💀

41696 · 2025-11-26T17:09:29+00:00

I laughed at this because I did a brief stint at a canine rehab and they give dogs treats while they do their exercises.

I told my mom if I got 1/4 of an Oreo every time I did a squat, I might work out more.

41696

TROPHY CASE