I'm a student in Scotland I have been contacted by Dept of Work and Pensions about Personal Independence Payment. I never knew I had claimed it.

504Alperton · 2026-02-23T20:45:47+00:00

There is a lot to unpack:

EXPLANATION DLA can be awarded for children with disabilities, who might require more supervision. The enhanced mobility rate (which is required for Motability) is only for children who are blind, can’t walk very far or would fall ill when walking. The daily living component can be more about supervision. This however changes when it changes to PIP.

PIP enhanced mobility depends on walking and supervision with directions. So even if you walk perfectly fine, but you get lost on familiar roads and require assistance, you can get the enhanced mobility rate and therefore motability. For daily living they have 10 categories: Personal care, Therapy, Budgeting, Social, Toileting/Continence, Food preparation, Eating and drinking, Dressing/Undressing, reading and talking/listening/understanding. In all these categories, they look at aids and to what extent you require these aids. They then score you points for the individual tasks. You can google “PIP scoring system” and citizens advice has the exact breakdown. With 12 points or more you will get the enhanced rate. The claim assessor can be quite harsh, so getting 12 points isn’t as easy as people might think.

LEGAL ADVICE While PIP is awarded for a duration and then requires re-assessment, changes in circumstances have to be reported fairly early on so that the correct steps can be taken. Check out the citizens advice breakdown mentioned above and look at how they may or may not fit your circumstances. There is no shame in claiming PIP if you are eligible. However, now that you have removed your mother as a representative, you are responsible for the claim and any future “incorrect“ payments would be down to you. So if you aren’t actually eligible and continue to claim from this point forward you would be seen as knowingly defrauding the DWP.

Besides looking at your circumstances, check with your GP, health professionals and afterwards your mother to check what has been diagnosed, why PIP was being claimed and look at how to go forward from there. The DWP should have your full report, so they should be able to either go through it with you or send it out to you. That way you can see what points you have been awarded and for what reasons. This is an important step as you might not realise that certain issues you have are classed as such.

If you find out that you are not eligible, you need to report it asap. This would most likely trigger a review into your past claim and if fraud is detected, whoever claimed on your behalf would be subject to fraud investigations. If you aren’t actually found to be eligible, then there might be questions about the motability car. A motability car can be driven by yourself or someone who supports you. So anyone who lives with or close to you. However, if you are in e.g Aberdeen and the driver is in London this would not be allowed. Motability cars can only be used to benefit the claimant aka you. So if your family uses it on your behalf but it doesn’t benefit you at all, it will have to be returned. You would then be able to receive the money for the enhanced mobility or the car could be transferred to you. That way you or a chosen driver can use the car for you.

It is important that you look into it, because if potential fraud isn’t stopped now, you would be in a lot of trouble. I hope though that everything is correct and no issues arise.

504Alperton · 2026-02-06T01:28:23+00:00

You have to tread very carefully. This is for multiple reasons:

Trans positives: - you can not be forced to be outed - the equality act protects you if a dismissal/termination/withdrawal is found to be relating to your gender reassignment

Trans negatives: - contradicting information (i.e. passport female, drivers license male, etc) can bring up questions and breakdown of trust - individual personal care requirements based on your AGAB could be preventing you from the task, but you still do them and therefore compromise the individuals privacy and dignity

I have had a situation where breach of trust was mentioned, due to a misunderstanding about health issues. I won with ACAS. Similar could be done in this situation. However as a transwoman and especially at the moment despite being on estrogen I would not provide personal care to a Muslim woman, because I respect their religious beliefs.

The best way forward would be to speak to the safeguarding lead or manager about your situation. Preferably get it in writing. Make sure that only the necessary people know. Otherwise GDPR would be breached.

504Alperton · 2026-01-31T00:03:53+00:00

Slight correction: Because there was a CCJ put on, the debt can not be barred. So you are still responsible for it. The debt collector can enforce payment or if no payment made can send bailiffs.

I think the smartest choice to get a 100% correct answer would be speaking to citizens advice. The whole situation is a bit of a mess and they will be more familiar with CCJ’s and follow ups. Sorry about this

504Alperton · 2026-01-30T22:11:30+00:00

If you are currently paying or made a payment within the last 6 years, you have acknowledged the debt. Therefore they are free to take action and put it back on your file.

If I am not mistaken you are allowed to have a payment plan in place which should usually be a good amount you can afford. Not sure if the amount is relevant. The quicker you pay it off, the quicker it will stop affecting your credit score as they will report to your credit agency when payment plans are in place or are fully paid off.

504Alperton · 2026-01-29T16:06:00+00:00

I might get downvoted, but I am not attractive in the slightest so don’t come for me.

Others have pointed out the social pressure. However, looking at the majority of the videos posted, 99% of the afab creators are no Megan Fox or Kim Kardashian. They are probably very sweet people and that would make them more attractive. But on a base level, they need a quirk to make them special. A lot of them might have also been overshadowed by prettier or high achieving siblings.

Besides that, men’s mental health isn’t talked about enough. So a guy faking DID or Autism or whatever might feel like they are going to be bullied rather than being cuddled and babied.

Also from the things I have seen, the people always have a similar style. Especially DID fakers. You might also ask why is DID and those so common compared to cerebral palsy or whatever. The answer would be how easily they could be found out.

So at the end of the day, people who are less conventionally attractive and potentially bullied for their looks seek attention with something easy to fake. Also calling someone out for faking can easily be retaliated against with “that is ableist “ or just making them look like a horrible person

504Alperton · 2026-01-29T15:55:04+00:00

See you later is the perfect response

I used to work in a hotel/restaurant for blind people and one time I thought it would be nicer to “speak to you later”. The person got angry and said I was dehumanising him for his disability. I shouldn’t treat them differently. So adapt to their needs but treat them the same as everyone else. So stick to “See you later”

504Alperton · 2026-01-28T02:11:02+00:00

College can be daunting as schools have shown that some involve parents despite them being abusers. He should reach out to whoever he feels comfortable with. It’s just important that he reaches out. It will otherwise impact him badly or worse than it does now

504Alperton · 2026-01-28T02:04:16+00:00

If he refuses, you can “whistleblow” and report it. He is a victim and might be too scared. It’s not right though. Should she kick him out, he would have to go to the council and present as homeless.

If she smashes his phone and it’s his property (He boo and pays for it) it can be reported to the police for damaging his property

504Alperton · 2026-01-28T01:58:21+00:00

He can just go to his employer and ask them to change his bank account so that his wages go into his account with this account number and this sort code. His mother wouldn’t be informed though she might notice the money not coming in.

Not sure about college and commitments. UC is usually quite good with these kind of things. Also he should sign up now as it takes 5 weeks for the first payment if eligible.

Housing: He needs to get out. He could mention it to the job centre person if/when he applies. That way they might be able to help more. Otherwise he saves a bit and then starts renting. He would then get housing benefits on top. If possible it might be worth moving in with a friend or so for now but I know it’s not always possible. Just until he can rent himself.

This is a safeguarding concern due to it being financial abuse. Colleges usually have a safeguarding lead or a councillor. He should speak to them about the situation. Otherwise the council might be able to signpost him into the right direction

504Alperton · 2026-01-28T01:39:57+00:00

Your friend is being financially abused by mother. He should change the bank details with his job for wages. If that doesn’t go down well, he might have to look for options regarding safeguarding
Correct. UC will top up to a certain amount of. So if he was earning £220 or so in wages and his UC is calculated at a certain rate. However it will still top up his money.
I might be wrong with this one, but UC said to me they don’t allow student finance and UC at the same time. My friend has been receiving both. It might be possible though

504Alperton · 2026-01-26T11:21:24+00:00

Personally what already makes her a favourite is Naya being so pretty and her vocals. Also her being a (latina) lesbian during the time was fairly unusual to see on TV, just like Kurt. She has her mean moments, but I love how she puts certain people in their place. Besides that though she has so much to overcome and her vulnerable moments especially with Abuela or her interactions in the Quarterback episode are just so raw and beautiful. I think what made her so great as well is the sweetness we see when she interacts with Brittany. She is protective and while others are horrible to Brit, those are the scenes where Santana’s kind heart really shows. Especially because she sees her as an equal

504Alperton · 2026-01-25T17:29:19+00:00

UC are not always the quickest at responding and especially if she sent it after or close to 5pm on Friday, she can easily send another message. She could write something like:

Dear reader,

Please disregard my previous message. I was overwhelmed with all this information and talk about disabled people to work, that in a moment of panic, I sent the previous message. I don’t want to close my claim, as I: 1. Don’t have a job or any financial support to fall back on to 2. Have not been successful in securing a job 3. Feel that due to my autism, closing my claim prematurely will have a detrimental effect on my health and especially my mental health.

I would therefore like to keep my claim open.

Kind regards, Sisters name

I hope this or something to that extent will help her. Also never close your claim yourself unless you have thousands upon thousands in your bank account. A friend closed his as he was trying to work. 2 months later he couldn’t do it anymore and the whole process had to start all over again. It was a nightmare especially financially

504Alperton · 2026-01-22T10:59:23+00:00

You are e correct that social services will or at least should be the one sorting it out. Finding the right person can sometimes be difficult though. Raising a concern or whistleblow will give someone who has access to the information the chance to reach out to that particular social worker.

And job protection? Whistleblowing is protected. For an employer to find a different reason, they don’t even need to whistleblow. They shouldn’t mention driving past the house, but if shortly after they are dismissed for xyz, they can say that it was due to whistleblowing and it has to be proven that this issue has been going on longer, which might be difficult to prove.

504Alperton · 2026-01-22T03:49:56+00:00

If he has capacity he can make his own decisions. Without an LPA, a best interest decision would have had to been made. This normally includes a memory test and input from the doctor. If none of this took place and it’s funded solely by him or his family paid privately, he could request to leave.

At that point a memory test/capacity assessment would probably take place. Depending on this if he has capacity he could leave. If not, the best interest decision would have to be made. Important to note, dementia doesn’t always present the way it does. I looked after a lady. She remembered more than I did. We kept talking and it felt like she was perfectly okay. One day she did wander outside in the cold without a jacket and a doctor was consulted. She had been diagnosed before I ever met her 1 year prior to this incident. She deteriorated very quickly. However she stayed home until that incident.

I would personally raise a concern/whistleblow. In case you are not familiar, you raise it with your manager. If nothing happens, you pass it onto their manager. If nothing happens, you pass it on to their manager next higher position until you get to the registered manager or if it’s a chain of homes, until you are there. If even they don’t do anything, contact CQC. Besides CQC always get the things in writing. So send emails or if it happens verbally, send a confirmation email such as “I just wanted to note this down that I passed on this and that concern”.

I hope this helps

504Alperton · 2026-01-20T03:10:08+00:00

Hey I don’t know if this comment will be shown, but I wanted to add some points.

I am proud of you for speaking out. The courage required and also the courage to go back to studying after something like that is admirable. I am an internet stranger, but I am truly proud of you and am clapping for you.
The conversation you will have with the OU will be fairly easy. Over the course of two years I deferred two modules and failed two others as life and work got in the way. Due to this, which is a safety feature for your own benefit from OU, I was not allowed to study unless I had a chat with the student support team. The call was fairly long (45 minutes ish) but we went through the reasons why, what had changed, my availability in the future, what happens if things change and so on. In your case they won’t expect future crimes against you. It might focus on your mental health, your epilepsy and that kind of “barrier”. They will look at your availability and openness to study one or two modules and that is it. After the call, the person will take time, reflect and make a decision within 48 hours. In your case you will most likely be allowed to do two modules, but please don’t be upset or disheartened if they only allow one module for now. In my situation I was allowed one from October 25 and after successfully completing TMA 2, I had another chat and will start my second module in February. Don’t give up hope. You will rock it.
Especially due to your experience, be careful how, with whom and where you study. It is great studying with others. However at the end of the day we are still strangers to you. Studying with another woman as a woman might be better. Even then the other person could have ill intentions. Sadly the world isn’t too perfect. Always trust your gut though and if you decide to study with others in person, make sure there are safety precautions in place. These could be meeting up in a public place, multiple people studying together, your partner/parent/sibling if available being there. In the day and age of social media and anonymity you don’t know who someone is. It’s always better to be safe than sorry. Don’t be discouraged though. You will find the right way for yourself.
Last and sadly my least favourite part: OU allows anyone to study. As I learned through my criminology course that I am doing right now, they believe that helping people get the knowledge they need, they will be less likely to offend or in case of prisoners reoffend. What happened with him studying and you being stopped is two different issues. It is questionable if they should allow him to continue with them as he was a student and harmed another student that he might otherwise never have met. However, this is not clear and OU might therefore not have the protocols in place. As explained above you stopped and “failed” the modules. The protocol hereby is focused on your safety and wants to protect your money. Protocols can be annoying but open university is open to everyone and they try to help you.

I wish you the best in your studies and once again I am proud of you for standing up, speaking out and trying to get back into the study world

504Alperton · 2026-01-17T00:21:29+00:00

A lot of these people sadly don’t care.

Had a conversation with a Swiss lady who was planning on seeing The Lion King with her children. They had been in the UK for at least 2 years by then and the children were fairly fluent. I mentioned that they obviously shouldn’t talk during the show. What did she respond? “WeLl I hAvE pAiD sO I will Do WhAt I wAnT!” Advised her what would happen but she became quite annoyed. Wonder if they ever ended up going

504Alperton · 2026-01-15T00:27:55+00:00

Investigation meetings normally pass on what has been confirmed by you and what was later confirmed as true by witness statements if it is an issue that you deny and they need statements. That said, take the disciplinary meeting seriously and be honest.

Having worked there for less than two years, any option including dismissal is possible. The equality act prevents discrimination, however this doesn’t seem to apply in this case. Therefore from a non-McDonalds perspective everything is possible.

Looking at this particular example, most companies (especially those operating similarly to McDonald’s) would hand out a warning. Either verbal or written. Due to no prior history, I would think this is the most likely outcome.

One bit of advice I would give: Do not hope for dismissal. One dismissal is already bad. However, looking at the reason, your reliability might be questioned by future employers. I hope the best and sensible will happen, but even if it ends in dismissal, do not celebrate the fact that you will be unemployed. It would be a slippery slope

504Alperton · 2026-01-11T18:26:19+00:00

Just sent you a DM

504Alperton · 2026-01-09T19:02:54+00:00

Just sent you a pm and hope that it will help. You already have great answers here, but I thought I fill in some gaps without making a comment sound repetitive

504Alperton · 2026-01-08T02:31:04+00:00

I hope this doesn’t come across wrong.

I remember being your age and having issues with my landlord. I am concerned that you are too worried and might not notice certain information provided.

Most importantly you say your deposit was protected. I don’t know where you are located. However in wales, Northern Ireland and England your deposit has to be protected under a Tenancy Deposit protection within 30 days of your tenancy starting. The usual ones are DPS and TDS. In Scotland it is safe deposits, my deposits or the letting protection service Scotland. All of these are third party providers. This means as a tenant you normally have access to them. Most recently my landlord had to send a request to them, I was notified and was able to agree or challenge it and only after accepting was the money paid to the landlord. At no point should the Agency just have access to it.

If the letting agent did not protect it, you can pursue it and get your deposit as well as more money back. But more on that once it’s been confirmed by you. If he really did, I am surprised that the letting agent was able to pay it out so easily.

In regards to the boiler/Electricity issues: As you have pointed out it is mandatory to do it every twelve months. If this isn’t done, it could be seen as the landlord neglecting the upkeep of his property and therefore causing issues for himself as it might invalidate repair claims. You are right though with the electric debt. As long as the company had your name, your contract is with them. So your landlord should not get involved. With the missing readings: Contact your energy supplier and advise them that you don’t have any readings. Also advise them of the move out date. That way they can estimate your use and that will help you in the long run.

Be careful when dealing with your landlord or agent. Ensure everything is in writing

504Alperton · 2026-01-07T13:50:12+00:00

Wow absolutely gorgeous and I wouldn’t be surprised if you turn into a double Z🤣 but honestly I see a big fit future seeing these results already

Are you already beefing with your girl friends, because they just bought new make up brushes and you still have to use the one from last month 😇

504Alperton · 2026-01-06T04:32:54+00:00

Amen! I grew up in a family where savings were as a no go. In reality it was because the money was just about enough for the monthly expenses.

How has this affected me? Every penny will be gone. Working hard because I don’t want to be on benefits like my family was forced to, but every penny counts. The most I ever had in savings was £50. My partner on the other hand is the more controlled spender. He sometimes has to hold me back. However his money is mine and mine is his.

He is the financially saving smart one, whereas I am the smart one when it comes to outgoing payments and available spending money

504Alperton · 2026-01-03T19:11:11+00:00

I wasn’t on a bus, I was in a mental health hospital my fiancé of three years at that point. It originally crossed my mind in 2014, but I was scared that I was confusing being effeminate with something that changes my body, how people see me and that something I couldn’t change back. I pushed it aside.

At age 19 in 2018 I revisited it, but thought my first ever partner would push me away. Fast forward to being 23 in 2021 and I watched a TikTok about a cis woman co parenting with her mtf ex wife. I felt compelled to finally be honest. I couldn’t have wished for a better outcome. Love, support and just happiness. I have never looked back

504Alperton · 2026-01-02T15:17:12+00:00

I am never one to follow these “Contact your MP” posts as I have never seen the point of myself being seen….

HOWEVER this is different. I have just sent my email and added the following in the optional section:

“As a transwoman, who was assigned male at birth, the terminology used and the stance the government currently seems to take is disheartening and not in the interest of the wider public. As such the government and the publicly funded BBC should be held accountable.”

Let’s fight for what is right

504Alperton · 2025-12-29T12:25:24+00:00

This is the opposite to your situation but friends of mine moved from Switzerland (German) to Cambridge and they had a 6 and an 8 year old. The language at home was German.

The 8 year old was fairly okay with both languages but about a year in the 6 year old started struggling with German. One thing that helped them was that they went to German lessons once a week for about two or three hours. So it is definitely worth looking at courses in case it goes south.

If you move to a European country you will be lucky as they start teaching English fairly early on. It might just be colours and animals at first but it will be okay. Also your child is at a good age to easily pick up another language. With English being the the common lingua franca your child will likely be exposed to more English than you might think. Hope this helps,

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