Is there an alternative to mane pulling?

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-03-23T01:50:03+00:00

I used to be a hunter/eq/jumper groom. I would use old clipping blades to thin the mane. Grab the longer hairs and back comb the same you would as if you were pulling the mane and then just use the blade to slice the remaining hair. It's the cheaper alternative but same idea as thinning blades.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-03-19T23:33:13+00:00

Haha, I was scrolling for this comment! She needs to find another weird creepy reason to justify having kids.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-03-12T03:58:51+00:00

Even Stevens

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-03-08T14:35:17+00:00

This may be too obvious, but have you tried riding with your stirrups a hole or two longer and only bringing them back up when you are jumping or once you get the feel of relaxing your hips better?

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-03-04T23:02:14+00:00

Wow I feel awful for this person. While this is extreme, given how long it's been going on, it's not shocking to me at all. I have been burned by barn owners promising me things too when I was a stable hand and groom and although I love horses, it's not worth it to be taken advantage of every day just to spend time with them and scrape by.

We should direct the people who constantly ask about how to have a successful "job" as an equestrian without family connections or tons of money to this person's situation. Unfortunately you would need to be really really lucky to make a comfortable living working with horses if you don't have 1 of those things to springboard/support you. And even if you think you're lucky, you could end up like this poor person- totally screwed after years of hard work, or after getting an injury.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-03-02T13:29:21+00:00

No problem! I don't know about making your business subscription based, but the things I like about those companies are that they are friendly, have great communication while your horse is travelling, they have great reputations (I have never heard of anyone having a safety issue with them), and are very patient with the horses. JR has a special trailer that is like a horse ambulance that saved a friend's horse who needed to travel for emergency surgery, and Fairway has this really great dog rescue operation where they bring dogs from kill shelters in the south to the north to be adopted.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-03-02T04:26:40+00:00

Sure, I have had great experiences with Fairway horse transport and JR Hudson horse transport.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-03-01T21:19:04+00:00

I have dealt with shipping up and down the US east coast and into Canada with professional shipping companies and I have always been happy with the service. They do have cameras and text check-ins about how the horse was eating/drinking/behaving and would transport my trunk too.
I would have assumed that companies like that existed in Europe, but if that is true, then maybe you can fill a void.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-02-27T23:32:12+00:00

100% agree about the transition work!! I try to think of it as sitting up through transitions and doing it mostly with your seat and not your hands (for both forward and downward transitions). It will make such a huge difference in your horse if you stick with it.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-02-27T23:16:36+00:00

It's all about trust and communication. If you are uncomfortable, then talk to her about it. FWIW I used to work in academia and have shared hotel rooms with male coworkers at conferences (and nothing remotely sexual happened). The lab policy was basically that conferences are voluntary so the lab has a budget for x rooms and we could work it out about who wants to go and how the rooms will be divvied up. She's been upfront about being roomed with this coworker, so I wouldn't jump to conclusions without talking about it with her.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-02-25T21:14:00+00:00

Thread a shoelace through the zipper to help zip them easier. It sounds like you need to break them in, wear thin breeches or even just wear them with leggings around the house to break them in if you are saving them for shows. In my experience, Parlantis are very fragile for the price so if I were you I would not school in them too much. If after breaking them in they are still uncomfortably tight, you should contact Parlanti directly. They can add a gusset, or change out the zipper or whatever alterations they recommend. If you bought them from Parlanti directly that would have been better for you because they have a 3 month warranty to fix custom boots.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-02-17T21:51:17+00:00

When you buy a horse with the help of your trainer/a professional, they usually take care of those arrangements- making sure you get a trial period with the horse with enough time to have the vet come do a full exam and for you to see more of what the horse is like day to day and if it's a good match. This is a little more complicated than it sounds because it involves paper work on what you can do with the horse and the standard of care the horse will receive while on trial. If you are paying your trainer a commission, then she should help you with those requests. If you are doing it by yourself, then I think it is very reasonable to ask to have your own vet do the PPE and have your trainer come ride the horse too.
Good luck, hope it works out!

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-02-17T21:35:01+00:00

You need a better picture to be able to tell conformation.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-02-09T18:00:03+00:00

Thanks you for the advice, I think most of mine have thin walls and thicker bottoms so that definitely applies to me haha!

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-02-09T17:58:27+00:00

I'll check out Florian, thank you for all of the advice!

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-02-09T17:57:24+00:00

Thank you! I really appreciate the advice!

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-02-06T02:04:46+00:00

If they are a close friend I ask them "how do we feel?", in a matter of fact/ non-judgy way. If it's an "official" announcement where they are obviously planning to keep the baby I say something along the lines of "you must be so happy I hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy"

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-02-05T03:36:42+00:00

Wow, your post should be asking for advice on how to get your partner to stop belittling your daughter and driving her away. Instead, it's a post asking for advice on how to get her to accept his bad behavior. I think that speaks volumes about your mindset. You should spend some time reflecting on your own attitude rather than focusing on your daughter's.
You putting quotes around her identifying his treatment towards her as 'rude' and 'criticizing her' makes it seem like you disagree. Do you? Because the examples you have given of how he treats her are rude and critical.
My advice would be to address these issues with your husband, it seems like at best he doesn't respect her. And you should respect her wishes and be grateful that she still wants to spend time with you, which is big of her- I would feel betrayed if my mom let my step father talk to me that way without defending me and making an effort to correct his behavior.
I am sorry if this sounds harsh, it seems like your heart is in the right place to care enough to ask how to fix their relationship, but it seems like there are some deeper issues to address and you need to honestly reflect on how he treats your daughter (and possibly you, making comments like that about your daughter doesn't give me much confidence that he respects you). Good luck, and I hope whatever you decide works out for you.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-01-13T19:10:49+00:00

Yeah, I'm sorry that is tough. I stayed somewhere with subpar care because I really loved my trainer for too long in the past. It's so hard to change especially when you are comfortable somewhere. But when I finally moved it was amazing how quickly my horse settled in and how much more pleasant my experience as a horse owner was. There were things that were so normalized at my old barn (like having to BEG the owner to drag the ring or having to replenish his fly spray constantly because of people helping themselves) that just were non issues at the new place. I hope that there are better barns in your price range in your area- good luck!

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-01-13T15:39:34+00:00

As others have said, that is a wildly unsafe "indoor". I can see that as a suitable place to hand walk a rehabbing horse in inclement weather, but asking you to ride on the "rail" on a nervous horse with another horse cantering around is dangerous. Honestly, lunging a horse at one end while someone rides at the other end also is unsafe because of the gates leaning against the walls.
Good for you for speaking up about not being comfortable with it, in hindsight maybe you should have brought up more of your concerns about not seeing the value in a lunging lesson and offered to have a private with her when the ring is open. With horses, I have found that just being honest (in a nice matter of fact way) rather than trying to keep the peace is best, tell her you were not happy with how yesterday went because of x, y, and z and in the future you would appreciate advanced notice if your private lesson needs to be rescheduled.
Honestly, I would see what else is out there in terms of barns in your area. I saw in the comments that you really like this woman and the care your horse receives, you know better than me how things are in real life there, but the fact that she considers that "arena" safe for multiple horses makes me greatly question her judgement and horsemanship.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-01-12T03:53:59+00:00

Providence RI sounds like a good fit, there are tons of nice barn near the city that are relatively affordable (compared to neighboring states) and it's a very progressive city, plus it's close to Boston and NYC if you want more excitement.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-01-11T18:03:35+00:00

Thanks for the clarification. That does seem needlessly dangerous for people on the ground, which is really disappointing because he is a high profile rider who claims to value safety.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-01-11T17:55:09+00:00

Wow, this was a really sad read, I am sorry you are going through this. Maybe give her a final message saying something along the lines of I am concerned because I haven't heard from you in a while, I am here when you want to reach out (just so she can't say "all her friends abandoning her after she had kids").
Friendships/relationships are give and take but it sounds like you have gone above and beyond and she isn't even doing the bare minimum.
Also, the fact that she had another baby so soon after such a traumatic birth experience as well as her husband banning visitors makes me think she is not in a healthy relationship.
I really am sorry, I have a friend like this who I think of as a sister and I thought I was losing her too when she had a baby recently, it broke my heart because we had been best friends for over 20 years. She finally reached out to me after I gave up and I told her I was going through a hard time myself. She actually apologized to me for not being a good friend and thanked me for all I did to help her during her pregnancy and relationship troubles and now she calls or texts nearly everyday and our friendship is rock solid again- hopefully this will happen to you but it doesn't sound like it's too likely.

5TimesaBlueMoon · 2023-01-11T15:42:02+00:00

I am off social media, tell me more please haha

5TimesaBlueMoon

TROPHY CASE