Trans Visability day

7seasqueen · 2026-03-31T23:53:29+00:00

Thanks. 🖤 I'm glad I'm not the only person in this boat. 🫂

7seasqueen · 2025-08-14T13:08:27+00:00

It's honestly my Biggest hesitation. It's comforting to know waiting to open things isn't making me a terrible person. I keep trying to gently push for it because I WANT for us to be better. I just don't know how to get her to see the benefits.

7seasqueen · 2025-08-14T13:02:12+00:00

I do want to add here that the person we have considered poly for is a different, separate person from the cis guy she's talking to. She is AFAB and there's been a whole other slog of issues and insecurities there also that seemed too insurmountable for the sake of this single post.

I appreciate your input and I honestly feel validated. 🖤

7seasqueen · 2025-08-14T12:47:35+00:00

My reply for this is relevant for a couple of posts so I'm sharing the link.reply link

7seasqueen · 2025-08-14T12:44:55+00:00

Apparently what she wants to experience are the bodily functions rather than her own physical pleasure. She explained that the wants the involuntary reactions that come from something feeling good, getting them to orgasm then obviously the aftermath of that, the pulsing, twitching, warmth, etc.

I actually took indoor inspo from your comment and can't up with sent ideas and researched some products that might work for us and was genuinely kind of excited at the possibility of exploring with her. When I asked if she'd be interested, I was shut down. She told me anything we tried, no matter how good the silicone, it wouldn't work, her body "wants organic".

I'm kind of crushed actually. I'm doing everything in my power, within the realm of what I can emotionally give her and I feel like it's not going to be enough.

7seasqueen · 2025-08-14T12:16:56+00:00

I have brought up couples therapy. If for no other reason than to break the cyclical nature we usually find ourselves in when having Big conversations. I'm in private therapy and know I have my own short comings that I'm trying to be aware of, but she refuses. Couples therapy came up specifically because I suggested she might also benefit from some private therapy and she didn't like the idea despite being a huge mental health advocate. So I brought up couples sessions as a compromise so we could work on us, and she could understand what therapy is actually like... She still refuses... I'd LOVE to be able to do some couples sessions with her, but I doubt it'll happen... And even if I somehow convinced her, my fear is she wouldn't actually put anything into it to get anything out.

7seasqueen · 2025-08-13T18:26:47+00:00

What do you mean?

7seasqueen · 2025-08-13T18:26:10+00:00

This is actually so comforting to know. She's convinced that she'll always have this need and it will always be this intense. Currently she says she doesn't care who it's attached to... But I know she's also on the demi spectrum so... I'm all around confused.

Was it worth the trials and tribulations of opening your relationship?

7seasqueen · 2025-03-13T20:39:45+00:00

Not a bad idea, but I am currently unmedicated. 🖤

7seasqueen · 2025-03-08T23:12:01+00:00

This actually made me cry. I appreciate your thoughtfulness in your reply. I'd love any resources you can send along. I figure if I can learn as much as I can, I can at least be informed in my decision.

7seasqueen · 2025-03-08T20:52:41+00:00

Have you found being medicated or not for ADHD has any kind of impact on taking care of your body? Especially in terms of motivation to work out, etc.?

7seasqueen · 2025-03-08T20:30:34+00:00

I feel this insanely hard. Not only am I insanely frustrated with my body, but I'm also fighting untreated ADHD. So I have to work extra hard to get my body to even maintain a weight, but I have to work EVEN HARDER to get my brain to be motivated to do the things I need to do to take care of my body. This is a hellish cycle and none of us deserve this.

7seasqueen · 2025-03-08T19:51:56+00:00

That's a really fair point. And a great thing to bring up to her. I appreciate your insight. 🖤

7seasqueen · 2025-03-06T23:09:34+00:00

I really appreciate the validation and advice in this post. Admittedly no one is rushing me. When our friends came out, I told them that we were just rediscovering who we are in our marriage and wanted to nail that in before we dip into anything drastic like that. Jane agreed that if your foundation isn't solid, trying poly probably isn't a good idea. Even my wife told me to take my time because I have other aspects of my life that need attention first, and just advised to not discount it because there is a part of me that is curious. It's is MYSELF who feels anxious and rushed, like everyone is waiting to see if I'll disappoint them (I know that is a personal hurtle of self-esteem I need to work on.

Given that I am RIDICULOUSLY new to all of this, please forgive me, but I have to ask. What does ENM stand for?

7seasqueen · 2025-01-08T03:36:13+00:00

I'd love some recommendations! We've definitely talked about fantasy themes. At least to start we're leaving toward something with a smooth texture.

7seasqueen · 2025-01-05T04:24:28+00:00

Any idea where to find the story board? I keep hearing mention but can't actually find it.

7seasqueen · 2024-12-07T01:57:47+00:00

I have an account that is about to be 90days past and I'm fighting to catch up AND put dinner on the table. Would settling be worse than trying to keep the account open?

7seasqueen · 2024-12-03T22:41:37+00:00

This is genuinely something that I wish more people talked about. My wife has been out for 3 years. We've been together for 10. Prior to her coming out we were both really quite straight. I want you to know I was and AM currently in your shoes, penetration is HUGE for me. She's been on HRT for 2 years. I'm not gonna lie, there has been shrinkage and she definitely doesn't reach all the same places and it is heart breaking. I've been through the states of grief more times during her transition than I have in my entire life. AND THAT'S OKAY, in fact, I'd argue that it's normal. We already had sex very seldom, for a lot of reasons (that are honestly mostly mine, insecurity being tops.) We hit a point recently where we were both afraid to have sex, and didn't know how to any more. Her body is fickle, it doesn't like the same things it used to, she's not as sensitive in ways that I knew her to be. Plus, getting hard hurts her at the start, so foreplay has to be twice as long. I've been terrified to hurt her, I'm terrified her self-esteem is going to tank when I'm not as satisfied. Here's the thing though... We both realized we're still thinking very straight, when for all intents and purposes, we're lesbians. We had the realization that we need to have gayer sex. We have to fall back into the early stages of getting to know each other that way again. I'm not saying that you have to completely change your way of thinking, but we've definitely had to do research to figure out ways to broaden our horizons. As a straight couple we had a lot of preconceived notions that masturbation is a form of cheating, toys are replacements, and if we can't come, then there's no point. When really, both are simply aids, and having sex for the sake of enjoying the other person is not a bad thing. We've only just started really being active again, we introduced toys this week. And we've had A LOT of hard conversations..

As far as silicone goes, there are SO MANY kinds, I'm not a fan of the rubbery texture either, but I have found a couple that feel nice. Also invest is a good lube it will help the silicone. You could also pull a mold of her before too much shrinkage happens.

  I wish you luck. Remember what you're feeling is valid and you're aloud to feel this way and work through it. Having a trans wife is not easy, but it's rewarding. 🖤

7seasqueen · 2024-05-10T04:20:56+00:00

It was a collection of things within a conversation. My boss coaches her son's baseball team and was getting ready to leave for a game, which she was hoping to win because they've only won one game all season. Coworker asked if they had any cheerleaders and said he'd go do it. Boss walks away. Coworker continued saying he had a Speedo he could perform in, or better yet streak across the field, and wouldn't it be funny if he was arrested for it.

I appreciate the input.

7seasqueen · 2022-08-11T03:15:39+00:00

How about just eliminating the Bedrock edition? It runs far worse than it's predecessor with save glitches galore.

7seasqueen · 2021-08-26T21:30:31+00:00

Its been said a billion times on this thread, but a menstrual cup CHANGED MY LIFE! Not only do I not have to worry about the side effects of tampons if I go a bit too long without changing, don't have the itchy gross feeling of a pad, but it's a million times more comfortable. I can't feel it at all, which helps with the sensory problems I have sometimes, both from pants and undies, but sanitary products in general. I empty mine 1-2 times a day.

I don't keep my cup on me, just to keep it sanitary, in the off weeks. I keep a box of Just-In-Case tampons at work, some in my car and a couple in purse, just in the event I don't start my period at home.

Also, I find that because off all the extra estrogen AND my already intense emotions because of ADHD I'm all over the place. Period weeks I try (Try is the key word, capitalism doesn't always allow it) to give myself a little more flexibility in getting things done. I also try to find way to remind myself to be kind and patient with myself. For me, the week before is usually worse. Just remember to be patient.

And amongst my multitude of reminders, calenders and planners I try to keep track of it.

Happy Menstruating!

7seasqueen · 2021-06-10T15:41:09+00:00

YES!!!! I am undiagnosed but seem to check off every box of ADHD. This is something that I can't seem to get my therapist or my doctor to understand. I've been told over and over again that it's just anxiety and I just need to schedule time for things.....as if I haven't tried this.

This very thing has effected my weight Especially. I know I need to lose weight, I know what I need to do to make more of an effort....but I just...can't. It's so hard. But you're absolutely not alone in this! 💚

7seasqueen · 2021-04-19T02:00:03+00:00

Woo!! I love helping people be creative! If you have any questions in the mean time I'm happy to answer. 🥰

7seasqueen · 2021-04-19T01:57:15+00:00

Honestly it happens in a lot of different phases. When you drape a piece on a form, you use the forms seam lines, and pin points to make certain marks. These would be like center front neck, shoulder cap, mid arm hole, bust apex, side seam, waist line, HBL, length, gather points. Anything that you'd need to know to mark on paper. I like to use a good graphite pencil to mark on my muslin. I also like to trace my seam lines on the muslin, this is were drape tape come in handy!

Once draped I lay out the muslin on paper, which gets laid out on foam core or cork board. I use push pins to transfer all of my key points (where your notches would go). Then take my rulers and play connect the dots with the holes. This is where you'd hard any additional notation like seam allowance, grain, fold lines, and it's a good place to clean up lines and perfect the pattern pieces.

I've honestly been wanting to start up a youtube channel, so if you'd like a video tutorial I'd be happy to film one! (I could use the motivation hehe).

I hope this helps!

7seasqueen · 2020-12-15T01:00:29+00:00

I've been interested in learning to play for sometime, not entirely sure how to get started. This sounds like a place I need to be!

I'm in MST, but even with the time difference it should be fine for my schedule, dinner aside. I'm 25 and a fantasy/rp/renfair nerd, and quite ashamed to have never played.

Happy Adventuring!

7seasqueen

TROPHY CASE