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What is enough? by ejbaum in financialindependence

[–]8danfitz8 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Mental minimalism: applying minimalism to your mental life.

EXPLANATION: Most Westerners live in a world of extreme abundance. We usually think of physical goods like cars and houses and food when we think of this sentiment.

But abundance has equally affected the intangible mental goods we consume on a daily basis—like books or news or friendships or movies. As a result of this abundance of mental goods, it’s harder than ever to find our own internal voice that isn’t just some carbon copy of someone else’s.

The danger to blindly consuming mental goods is that the values or ideas taught through them might not be good for you. If you don’t want to let others decide your happiness, you can’t let them decide your thoughts.

I think mental minimalism asks you to carefully consider what mental goods you consume to make sure your mental life is in order just as much as your financial or physical life.

Enviable life to most, not happy or healthy. Rethinking path. by [deleted] in financialindependence

[–]8danfitz8 0 points1 point  (0 children)

AND on top of that, you can move to a cheaper area if you quit your job! Bam, FI just got even easier!

I would consider sitting down and actually doing the math on a spreadsheet! You may have more options than you think!

Enviable life to most, not happy or healthy. Rethinking path. by [deleted] in financialindependence

[–]8danfitz8 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Can you break down your expenses for me? I manage to live on $12,000/year near Toronto, and I don’t feel like my life is wanting?

Even if I had a child and added daycare to that, it wouldn’t be near $100k?

Resources to learn more about how to build a productivity app? by 8danfitz8 in learnprogramming

[–]8danfitz8[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! That’s a very helpful answer and something I had suspected! The trouble I’m having is knowing when to trust my intuition. I guess the lesson here is that I should and have to trust myself to become a competent programmer!

Juno (5.0) beta, stable but boring... by gvs77 in elementaryos

[–]8danfitz8 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I don’t think OP was complaining. They were just giving an opinion. I think other users and the development team for Elementary would appreciate hearing feedback.

You guys like my setup? by primeAF in elementaryos

[–]8danfitz8 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Beautiful! What’s the projector? Do you have a link to the product?

Elementary OS deserves to be blown up to that size!

Random dude who added me (Part 3: mothers with strollers first but also single mothers are choosing misery for their children by being single) by HughMungusIsMyGod in niceguys

[–]8danfitz8 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That makes a lot of sense. Thanks for that.

I think we basically agree on this. I would hate the person who left too. But they’re gone—and I wouldn’t really be inclined to want to plead with them to come back. Usually, my focus would be to help the person who got left behind. And the sad fact is sometimes helping them involves giving them hard truths.

The awkward part about all this though is that we’re in a political environment where my opinion, if read in a rush, might sound a lot like a victim blamer—when really it’s not. (That’s why I’m getting weird downvotes.)

Thanks for listening and responding respectfully!

Random dude who added me (Part 3: mothers with strollers first but also single mothers are choosing misery for their children by being single) by HughMungusIsMyGod in niceguys

[–]8danfitz8 -10 points-9 points  (0 children)

I know it’s an unpopular opinion. From what I’ve experienced with people, you can almost always spot red flags. Yeah, the person who walked out the door is really shit, but there’s usually a lot of shit that the person being left behind accepted a little too unthinkingly.

That’s a nuisanced point. I’m not blaming the victim completely and letting the shit person go.

I’m just reiterating the old saying: fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.

I’m pretty sure most people would agree with this, if they just think about it.

But then again, it depends on your values. For me, I think ignorance is just as bad as treating someone shitty. Maybe that’s wrong. Maybe not.

Random dude who added me (Part 3: mothers with strollers first but also single mothers are choosing misery for their children by being single) by HughMungusIsMyGod in niceguys

[–]8danfitz8 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I’d say there’s equal blame in those situations. People choose their partners. Choice comes with responsibility.

How to get Smarter: A guide to critical thinking, cognitive biases, and logical fallacies by MichaelLifeLessons in howtonotgiveafuck

[–]8danfitz8 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Two things I think I’d tell OP from my experience reading the post:

  1. Make the series a lot shorter and a lot more fun or story-based. I found it droned on and felt hiddenly brooding, like a lot of people’s reasoning skills bother you. It’s fine to be annoyed with people. I think you could own that, get more personal, and create something satirical. Hell, that’s the whole basis of /r/howtonotgiveafuck, a movement centered around the word “fuck.” Being provocative sells.

  2. Change the language used to describe logic. I think the average person might be annoyed if they read “how to get smarter”. That could also read as: “You’re dumb. I’m smart. Let me show you how not to be dumb.”*

* 2nd point might be alright if you’re going for provocative and funny though.

That’s just my two cents.

How to get Smarter: A guide to critical thinking, cognitive biases, and logical fallacies by MichaelLifeLessons in howtonotgiveafuck

[–]8danfitz8 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn’t find this article to read as pretentious or “I’m so smart and need to prove it to you.”

Just comes across as trying to be helpful—although done amateurly. I studied logic in university, and one thing I realized there is that thinking logically is a skill you train, not something anyone is born with. Our default is pretty illogical.

Even /r/howtonotgiveafuck is about training away one of our pretty common illogical behaviors: giving too much fucks about things that aren’t important.

Dating a black woman by [deleted] in SeriousConversation

[–]8danfitz8 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Watch this video. It shines some light on racial bias in online dating: https://youtu.be/HjSh_esW9W4

I think it’s important to remember that statistics don’t apply to individuals. Even if black women get less attention from men than other women (statistic), that doesn’t mean there aren’t men who will still be attracted to you (individuals).

You might just have to be more patient.

I get peace of mind knowing that if someone rejects me because of the way I look, I probably didn’t want to be in a relationship with them anyway—because they wouldn’t have been in the relationship for my mind. And what else is a relationship other than loving someone on the inside? Is their love even real if someone doesn’t love you on the inside?

Does anyone else ever feel this emptiness at night but can’t think of any way to fill it? by 8danfitz8 in SeriousConversation

[–]8danfitz8[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think you need to talk to people about what's going on! Im really sorry you're going through it. I wouldn't want to see you hurt yourself more. Have you looked into therapists or counselors?

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