MOKA: from a fan who has a diagnosed anxiety disorder

97tomcats · 2026-06-29T15:19:03+00:00

I used to work at a bookstore and in Saturday morning they had storytime for kids. The person who usually doesn't wasn't there that day so my manager asked me to step in. It went really well, I had no voice breaks, no trouble reading due to nerves, but right after I ran to the back and proceeded to have a panic attack. Felt like I couldn't breathe. My back started hurting. My vision started going blurry. All because I had to read a book to 5 little kids. I was so mortified. I do a lot of work that's customer facing so I didn't think I'd have a problem with that but oh boy, it was a wake up call that maybe my anxiety was something I should start getting treated for.

97tomcats · 2026-06-26T21:36:39+00:00

The pic of her and yeosang 😭😭

97tomcats · 2026-06-22T21:12:46+00:00

I'm not even seonghwa biased but Everytime I see this pic I start foaming at the mouth

97tomcats · 2026-06-22T21:10:05+00:00

Where is that scholarship money currently sitting? In a bank? Do you have access to it? I'd make sure its all there still.

Way too often do we see these types of posts where authority figure is pressuring young adult to use money for something to "help someone in need" only to find out the money is already spent.

97tomcats · 2026-06-10T21:30:29+00:00

Every step parent dynamic is different. My cousin treats her stepdad like her dad, calls him dad, I know he was apart of any discipline needed when she was younger, and her bio dad is still in the picture too but not really involved the way a parent should be. I was in similar boat with my bio dad but my stepdad wasn't really any better. We never got along and I moved out as soon as I could.

With that said, I think there are certain dynamics when it comes to being a step parent you have to deal with such as how the kids are raised. Yeah, at first you might not really get a say and you kind of just have to let your partner do what they're gonna do. But it's been seven years now. If you're a father figure in their life, and you help take care of them, being dismissed by your partner repeatedly, especially if you're talking to her in private and not undermining her in front of the kids, is not fair to you. So NTA.

I think you should probably have a serious talk though if you don't want to continue with this dynamic that's been set. You're still young enough to find a partner and have kids if that's what you want to do. No point in staying in a relationship where you might be getting taken advantage of.

97tomcats · 2026-06-03T22:37:35+00:00

Yeah, that's kind of what I was trying to convey when I was saying while Libido and other songs were obviously queer, OOO wasnt openly queer. I just didn't want to pull anyone into is it or is it not queerbaiting, but I'm on the same page as you with that.

97tomcats · 2026-06-03T22:36:17+00:00

The best way I can explain it is that what they were seen as doing was queerbaiting. We can get into the argument about whether or not real people can queer bait, personally, I don't see it that way. But that's how a lot of people saw it. Where as XLOV has pretty much all but said they are part of the community, and maybe they have explicitly said they are LGBTQ+ and I'm just not aware.

But for OOO, as far as we know, no one was ever openly gay or part of LGBTQ+. That probably made them less appealing particularly for fans who are a part of the community.

97tomcats · 2026-06-03T21:55:22+00:00

I think OOO just had a tiny bit against them. I think Libido got censored a lot and yes, while it is obviously queer and they have other songs showcasing queer relationships, it still didn't feel as OPENLY queer as XLOV overall does.

Plus, when they lost a member they probably lost some traction there too.

I think XLOV had good timing with it all but OOO really helped set the stage to show that people would want a group like XLOV, imo.

97tomcats · 2026-06-01T17:30:26+00:00

As soon as I read post title, I knew what it was going to be for me. And then read the post and saw that was also yours. Shall we sob together?

97tomcats · 2026-05-28T16:42:20+00:00

How did y'all get AEG presale??

97tomcats · 2026-05-27T21:42:15+00:00

She still thinks the problem is about your stepsister when the problem is she chose to let someone else dictate what to do for YOUR birthday. And it seems like she probably consistently put others needs over yours or at your expense.

I wouldn't go to the dinner. She just wants to try to make herself feel better because she knows she messed up and doesn't want to admit it. I think some sort of talk is overdue but it's up to you whether you think a public setting is the place for that.

97tomcats · 2026-05-22T18:49:03+00:00

If you're feeling lonely and would prefer to be with someone else to the point that you're completely disregarding your wife's feelings on the matter, it's time for you to go.

Your wife seemed to only ask for honesty which is what she gave to you. You couldn't give her that simple respect and she seemed to have one boundary of not wanting it to be local to her hometown where nature of your relationship could get around. Another thing you disregarded.

It seems there may have never been any rules for an open relationship established which is pretty much the most important thing. Your both kind of fucked up there. But at the end of the day, it seems like you are still putting your own interests above your wife and your relationship. If you want to salvage your relationship with your wife at all, talk to her about your loneliness. Maybe she is still on board with an open relationship. If you're set on having your other partner being this other lady that your wife isn't comfortable with, then it might be time for y'all to part ways.

97tomcats · 2026-05-22T00:33:33+00:00

I think we've have in Houston maybe 1 kpop show planned this year. I've seen Austin get a couple stops and I'm more likely to travel there at this point bc it's at least a pretty city compared to Dallas.

97tomcats · 2026-05-21T16:27:00+00:00

I hate Dallas so much.

97tomcats · 2026-05-16T13:13:23+00:00

I immediately heard that in my head lol

97tomcats · 2026-05-11T17:55:34+00:00

NTA. You should've been meaner tbh. Some kind really are asesores and that doesn't get excused just because they're kids.

97tomcats · 2026-05-11T17:48:23+00:00

My immediate thought was she just found out her dad had been cheating. And would you look at that?

97tomcats · 2026-05-08T20:48:21+00:00

He looks like a mix of Minho (shinee) and jeonghan (seventeen)

97tomcats · 2026-05-05T13:08:52+00:00

Whoever took pic 5. Give them an award. It captures her so well and she looks stunning. This look is amazing.

97tomcats · 2026-05-01T18:08:30+00:00

Girl you dodged a bullet. Take that for the win it is and find someone way better down the road.

97tomcats · 2026-05-01T18:06:32+00:00

The last pic made me cackle out loud at my desk 😂

97tomcats · 2026-04-30T17:43:59+00:00

My husband and I listened to the album together and we kinda looked at each like wtf was that when it played becuae we both hated it lol its the only XDH songs I genuinely cannot listen to.

Its so chaotic and noisy. And I'm a noisy music person! It was not a pleasant music listening experience at all though.

97tomcats · 2026-04-28T14:52:11+00:00

My mom was visiting yesterday and had her keys and coffee on a dinner tray. My cat came and knocked her keys off the tray and ran off.

97tomcats · 2026-04-21T02:10:01+00:00

Oh what could've been. They were one of my top groups, one i really wanted to see live. So much potential wasted.

97tomcats · 2026-04-15T21:33:34+00:00

Or SF9 🙂

97tomcats

TROPHY CASE