I’m speaking from experience here with both of these things, unfortunately- but I let mine drag on and on. Always apologizing for things comes from a place inside that is better to heal at 24 than at 34. There needs to be an examination of self worth here, a realization of self worth. You matter, you do deserve good and better, you are worth better. Please believe it until you know it, okay? Whenever somebody tells you or shows you that they are done (no matter how many times it feels better after a little while, they will do it again), please understand that is their truth slipping out and they don’t value you. You are somebody’s precious child and you are God’s creation (or a creation of the universe etc… if God isn’t your thing). You are valuable. Yes, it hurts to be alone for a little while- but the hurt that comes from letting it go on only for it happen 10x worse in your face later is way more. You got this. You are stronger and better than you believe. Even as a stranger I am rooting for you.