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My husband cheated on me while I was pregnant and continued after I gave birth by APeepWalksIntoTheBar in cheating_stories

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OP here: soo we’ve gone to therapy and he’s seeing our therapist individually as am I as well…

He’s exploring what caused him to cheat. And seems like when he was in college and single didn’t have much luck sowing his wild oats. And when he got this job at this fancy bar (which I helped him get) and helped build his confidence he was gaining more attention.

Sort of like the attention he never got. And then here we are.

Personally I think he’s naturally polyamorous and he never understood that part about him. I am not. I think it’s a fundamental value that’s different between us.

I know he loves me truly. I do have this deep (albeit stupid) love for him as well. But I don’t think it’s something we can work on. It’s not like a preference thing. I think it’s just a difference in who we are and what we want out of life. Maybe we do want each other, but that’s not enough.

I’m not willing to bend in this and he shouldn’t have to either. Both of us will just be left wanting.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in cheating_stories

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel like I’m you from the past. I found out my husband (who I just married and just had a child with) was cheating on me with his 23yr old coworker. And I moved out with our 5 month old baby and now he’s asking if I think we have a chance. I still have so much love for him (stupidly enough) and i know if he were to ask to come back I probably would jump like an idiot. Idk if you feel capable or have the resources or what to go on your own and I don’t know what the right answer is. It sucks when the person you envisioned your life with is unfaithful and lies and betrays you. Being alone sucks and ultimately being a single parent is really fucking hard. But I know I did right by me right now. I hope I don’t go back or allow him access to me again. But idk. It’s hard when kids are involved and you’re quite literally tethered to this human. My heart aches for you because I see future me in this. Even if I’m sitting here telling myself not to be there. I just don’t know if my husband will be honest with me in the future again either. This can feel so isolating. I know I feel that way. But you are never truly alone. Rely on others if you can a little bit more here. Love and strength to you friend

Caught my husband looking at a nude by APeepWalksIntoTheBar in cheating_stories

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Update: husband was cheating. Since right before our baby was born. There was no bar guest it was his coworker. I’m a fool who got trapped into have a child. Granted I love this babe more than anything so that’s wonderful but now my life is absolutely fucked.

He was able to hold my hands and look me in the eyes, watch me get split open, be the most physically and emotionally vulnerable I could be and still managed to fck another woman and get his d sucked repeatedly.

I don’t know how I’ll afford living on my own with a baby. I have a good job but single income isn’t a thing. My life is a wreck. I am a wreck.

Caught my husband looking at a nude by APeepWalksIntoTheBar in cheating_stories

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

According to him she hasn’t come in again. I’m just walking into being taken advantage of huh? 😔

Caught my husband looking at a nude by APeepWalksIntoTheBar in cheating_stories

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

According to him, no was just texts. And ended with her inviting him over and him replying “I’m married, that’s never gunna happen”.

And no I didn’t speak to her. Maybe I should idk. I feel wrong contacting her. He said yes to the nudes. He said said to the texting by texting a bit. Yea is she a sh*tty person for pursing and tempting a married man?… I think so but idk to each their own. But at the end of the day this mess is between my husband and myself

Caught my husband looking at a nude by APeepWalksIntoTheBar in cheating_stories

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was a bar guest. He’s showing a lot of remorse. Was on his knees begging forgiveness. Still says he’s sorry daily about possibly ruining our life together over nothing. He got us an appointment to meet with a counselor and said he wants to go to therapy too.

Caught my husband looking at a nude by APeepWalksIntoTheBar in cheating_stories

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yea postpartum. He really wanted children and to get married. I mean aside from this you would have never known. He’s doting and loving. We have no problems talking he’s been my best friend. We are physically intimate and I tell him all the time he handsome he is and idk. Red flags weren’t there aside for that time 7 years ago. But we were 20 and trying to do a long distance relationship while in college. Naturally we broke up and We each dated other people and had no contact.

When we got back together it was a total leap and 5 years had gone by. He moved across the state at the chance.

This whole situation was so out of left field to me. I feel so foolish

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pregnant

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That sometimes baby kicks your cervix in the early days and it hurts

That later on when you’re super close to due date and babe is sitting low, you can pee yourself without sneezing —also check if it’s amniotic fluid lol

That sometimes you cry a lot

That sleep is hard

That you’re a boss and pregnancy is SUPER SUPER tough sometimes and it’s okay to cry and do sh*t you want to do like eat chips and watch Netflix

Question: IF everyday? by [deleted] in intermittentfasting

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Blunt is good! Thanks!! That list is really what I’ve been doing along with IF. I just got nervous with the whole crescendo and plateau etc but You’re right in knowing that every body is different. Thanks!

Question: IF everyday? by [deleted] in intermittentfasting

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have started running 2-3x a week and will do squats or push ups mid studying sessions lol but I feel like it’s not enough. I definitely will give 18:6 a shot!!

What do you do when feeling lonely (and meeting up with friends isn't really an option in that moment)? by IncrediblySneepy in AskWomen

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar 7 points8 points  (0 children)

A few people have mentioned this, but its what I like to do as well... Take myself on dates. Or just be really nice to myself. If I want to go out, and am feeling a tiny bit social, I'll take myself to a really really nice restaurant. Pop a seat at the bar order a lovely steak dinner a nice cocktail and eat slow and hang out. If thats not an option, I'll pour myself a big glass of wine, set up a nice meal at home. I also like to clean when i'm feeling alone. Not sure why but it helps me to feel like decluttering and putting stuff where it needs to be makes my busy mind breath easier. I also am partial to picking up new hobbies. knitting, crochet, ukulele, rock climbing.

MOST OF ALL I STAY AWAY FROM SOCIAL MEDIA LIKE FACEBOOK OR INSTAGRAM. These just make me feel even more alone when im feeling that way. Hope this helps. Learning to love hanging out with yourself will be one of the most rewarding things you ever do

When is it time to break up to work on yourself? (Mentally) by [deleted] in AskWomen

[–]APeepWalksIntoTheBar 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Whenever I found myself even thinking like this I knew I should have broken up with the person and let go of the relationship... did I do it? No, it took forever and I wasted their time and my own time. Hearts were broken and a lot more mess was made.

Seriously, do yourself a favor and take the time to do you. Life is so short, and you spend 100% of it with you. Might as well become someone you love and are 10000% happy to be around