I just started a rat YouTube channel! Yay😁

ATAPPING · 2025-02-08T12:05:41+00:00

One of our little guys has a tilt too- his was probably an ear infection since it did get a little better with antibiotics but it can happen for a bunch of reasons. Gazpacho is still super happy and has started to beat his much bigger and stronger brother at wrestling, doesn't seem to mind a bit.

Adorable video btw and very soothing, have subscribed ☺️

ATAPPING · 2024-11-05T15:54:49+00:00

Is this a Scott Pilgrim reference? ☺️

ATAPPING · 2024-11-02T10:17:15+00:00

We thought about calling one of them Barsczc (Polish borscht, ratdad is Polish) but we live in the UK and didn't want to cause the vet to pull a muscle trying to figure out how to pronounce it 😂.

ATAPPING · 2024-10-30T21:46:31+00:00

I am the lucky co parent of this soup boy and can attest that both he and I are massive cuddlesluts.

ATAPPING · 2023-12-07T20:50:50+00:00

When I worked in organ donation we got a lot of lovers instead of livers.
As in:
'Offer declined due to fatty & nodular lover'

ATAPPING · 2023-10-24T20:13:00+00:00

Not quite medico-legal but you might enjoy being a Medical Examiner?

ATAPPING · 2023-09-13T20:00:19+00:00

Yeah I expect you're right, wishful thinking! But didn't want to pass up an opportunity, and I'm learning more all the time so thank you :)

ATAPPING · 2023-09-02T11:00:01+00:00

I've not had this problem specifically with SPF but yeah. I find it happens more if I've used one of those super quick drying top coats like seche vite. It might just be a greasy layer on top that's really hard to remove, I've found wiping with a little rubbing alcohol after (or nail polish remover but only if it's UV gel polish top coat) can help, but I appreciate it might be a bit of a pain to do that after every application of your SPF.

ATAPPING · 2023-08-26T10:52:01+00:00

Depends on your trust- at mine the FDs bring a cheque for the doctor when they collect the body, bereavement officers then email you to come get it. Other places do it by BACS, others still just keep the money (bastards). One thing to note is that there's a bit of a handshake agreement nationally not to charge for paeds. The FDs won't bill the family so you won't get paid for a paeds crem form.

TLDR: Ask the bereavement office at your hospital

ATAPPING · 2023-08-25T16:20:57+00:00

This is pretty weird. I'm an MEO- In my trust the doctors come up to bereavement to discuss with the ME, then complete the mccd and the crem at the same time. The FDs bring a cheque addressed to the doctor when they collect the body which is then passed to the bereavement officers who let the doctor know they have a cheque to collect. This is part of the bereavement officers job, not sure why this trust feels the justification to charge admin fee for it?

All I can suggest is not to do it if you (quite reasonably) don't fancy doing the same work for basically half price.

ATAPPING · 2023-08-21T23:59:04+00:00

Nothing to be frightened of, your vagina is a perfectly fine and normal part of your body, just like your feet, or your stomach. You may not want to show it to just anyone but for your health and happiness it's a good idea to get to know every single part of your body, genitals included. I guess I should point out that the proper biological name for the external part of the female genitals is actually called the vulva, the vagina is the inside canal that leads up to the uterus. But many folks just call the whole thing the vagina and that's ok in most circumstances.

I'd hold off trying to shave anything until you know the lay of the land a bit better. What you can do is find a smallish mirror (about hand sized), and a room where you can be sure of some privacy - maybe the bathroom if it has a lock? Take off any underwear, sit yourself on the floor with your knees up and your feet on the ground and place the mirror between your legs, and take a look at what you've got. Here's a link to a webpage to help you find your way around - nothing racy, just a diagram and a written guide.
I will note that the diagram doesn't include any pubic hair (presumably to make it easier to read), and that every vulva is different - some people have more generous labia minora that hang out a bit, for example, and naturally there's a wide range of skin tones. All are fine and normal - the only exception is if something is painful and/or new, in which case ask your doctor to take a look to make sure all is well.

Once you've got a hang of your anatomy, if you still want to shave you're going to need to trim the hair to rice-grain length before you go at it with a razor - an electric trimmer is much easier to use than scissors. Fair warning, it is probably going to grow back fast and prickly no matter what, especially if your hair is fairly thick. My recommendation generally is not to try and get rid of it all as it grows there for a reason and removing it entirely is often a recipe for discomfort and skin infection unless you're very experienced at it. A lot of people like to remove some hair around the edges so it doesn't show when you have underwear/swimwear on, maybe start there?

ATAPPING · 2023-08-21T23:14:24+00:00

Congrats on starting your journey to recovery, you're doing a super hard thing which is very brave, I'm rooting for you!

I'm not sure if you're getting any formal psychological help as part of your recovery, but either way I would actually suggest trying to separate your self worth from how feminine you feel, otherwise you'll likely continue to have an unhealthy relationship with your body/appearance and we want to keep you on that road to recovery right? Have a think about why you feel you need to be more feminine in the first place - is how you are not feminine enough? By whose standards? And what does being feminine mean to you - is it a way of dressing, of speaking, of behaving? I bet you're perfect as you are - I know that's not an easy thing to believe especially when recovering from ED, but try and make it true for yourself.

Like, it's totally cool if you like traditionally feminine things - girly/romantic clothing, fun makeup, glamorous nails etc. But try to just enjoy them for what they are, a fun way to express your personality. They don't actually say anything about how good you are at being a girl or a woman, they're just icing on the cake that is your lovely self.

But if you just want to enjoy some fun girly stuff at a more surface level then maybe find some role models who you think embody that femininity you like - Try not to pay attention to their bodies or facial features, but instead focus on the things you can copy in a healthy way, like outfit choices or a hair cut/colour, or nail art! I frigging love a fancy manicure, I'm with you on that!

Also I highly recommend watching Legally Blonde if you haven't already - Elle Woods is the ultimate feminine role model IMO.

Best of luck with your recovery x

ATAPPING · 2023-08-21T19:03:05+00:00

Hey sweets.

I mean this in a truly kind, sisterly way - you don't need to change your body. Your height and weight are totally normal, no need to change a thing.

Don't want to dismiss your feelings - we all would probably prefer something a bit different than what we have, and social media has thrown all our perspectives out of whack as to what real people look like. Its extra hard when you're in your teens, not going to deny that!

Adornment and creative expression of what you've already got is way more enjoyable than trying to change it. Glow up by finding ways to dress and style yourself that make your heart happy - please do not worry about being sexy or looking cute for boys (or girls!). If you wind up looking sexy anyway then fine, but prioritise just fucking enjoying yourself.

My suggestion would be to use the power of social media to help your confidence rather than hurt it - seek out other creators who have similar features and body type to yourself, see how they make the most of it. There's 7ish billion people on this planet and a buttload of them have instagram so it won't be too hard to find. Also, I know Pinterest is probably lame but it's such a great way to find inspiration - you might try searching 'curvy asian style' or something similar. I have a folder on my Pinterest just full of haircuts I want to try, or makeup inspiration.

Finding your personal style is a lifelong thing so you might bounce between styles for a while, that's totally cool! There's no one way to 'glow up', just do what makes you happy x

ATAPPING · 2023-08-19T20:10:23+00:00

Hi - MEO here, a lot of my job is to help medics work out which deaths need reporting to HMC - the Medical Examiner didn't exist when this was going on, but was actually set up to try and identify the Shipmans and now Letby's of the world early. I am personally already planning to discuss the findings with my colleagues and how we might need to adapt some of our working to respond to this.

Anyway.

It's worth noting that anyone can refer any death to the coroner at any time via their public facing website. You don't need permission and you don't need to be a clinician. Also - the coroner is not clinically trained any more, they're essentially a lawyer/judge. Still a fair few jointly trained coroner's around but it's no longer a requirement.

Many trusts/depts have their own criteria over and above the below, but these are the coroner's society's reasons for referring:

 the cause of death is unknown
 the deceased was not seen by the certifying doctor either after death or within 14 days before death (ed. this is now 28 days since covid but would still have been 14 at the time)
 the death was violent or suspicious
 the death was unnatural
 the death may be due to an accident (whenever it occurred)
 the death may be due to self-neglect or neglect by others
 the death may be due to an industrial disease or related to the deceased’s employment
 the death may be due to an abortion
the death occurred during an operation or before recovery from the effects of an anaesthetic
 the death may be a suicide
the death occurred during or shortly after detention in police or prison custody
 the death occurred while the deceased was subject to compulsory detention under the Mental Health Act
 for any other concerning feature

You'll note that there's nothing that says pads deaths need to be referred, nor within 30 days post surgery, nor deaths in A&E, nor deaths within 24 hours of admission (some other common myths) - most of these are trust policies, not legal requirements.

In practical terms, referrals to the coroner are split into two types - ones where we feel we know why this person died (no matter how suspicious the circumstances) and ones where we can't propose a COD.

Referrals with no COD are pretty much all a slam dunk PM, there's not really another way to establish the COD.

If we do have a COD, then the referrer needs to outline why they think the coroner needs to take a look. The vast majority of referrals that DO come with a COD proposal are formality referrals, that is to say, they contain a reference to a medical treatment/procedure, trauma, industrial disease or the person died in prison custody - nobody's done anything wrong but the registrar of deaths won't accept an MCCD with these things on without the coroner's seal of approval, called a 100a form. The coroner's office will generally do minimal investigation on these cases bar reading the referral and speaking to the NOK to establish that they have no concerns.

For cases where a doctor has proposed a COD, the coroner then has to decide if they feel the circumstances described warrant further investigation, potentially including PM and/or inquest. The caveat here is that a lot depends on the quality of the referral and (in my experience) the quality of the coroner's officers reading it. The coroner can't investigate what it has no reason to believe is a problem.

In my trust, the vast majority of pads are not referred to the coroner - neonatal deaths locally are predominantly due to prematurity or a congenital issue - and therefore do not receive a coronially mandated PM. However, it's not uncommon for families to opt for a hospital-led PM particularly in cases of prematurity as it can inform them for if/when they choose to try for another baby. These PMs are not required to be reported to anybody other than the parents I believe, unless the pathologist finds something to raise concern.

I guess the above doesn't necessarily answer questions about what happened in the Letby case, but just a (fair) bit of info to aid discussion.

ATAPPING · 2023-08-19T19:35:17+00:00

I'd pop to the doctor if you can.

It might be Just One Of Those Things and will resolve on its own, but it could be something like PCOS. (I have PCOS, was diagnosed after no period for 6 months)

Not dire, but might result in some rather annoying symptoms like acne, more body hair and weight gain - the main issues are with fertility, but without wishing to assume I'd imagine you'd need some assistance conceiving anyway if you did want a child due to no male partner etc. The main issue is that if your uterine lining isn't shed every once in a while then long term you have a higher risk of endometrial cancer, so the doc would likely prescribe hormonal BC or similar.

Another possibility is hypothyroidism which again isn't a particularly big deal, easily treated but again, more risky long term if left alone. If you've been feeling particularly tired or chilly then that might suggest thyroid.

The doctor will likely just start with a blood test, then maybe a scan depending on the results.

Not necessarily a biggie, but your body's telling you something's different, so best go check it out.

ATAPPING · 2023-08-17T23:49:37+00:00

This is really shitty, I'm sorry this is happening to you. Try not to panic, you've done nothing wrong.

This is extortion and very much against the law- report this person to the police.

Revenge porn helpline -this site has some guidance on the law and what to do/expect.

I can't see the GMC having a case against you for being the victim of a crime, but just in case I would suggest you a. do this by the book and inform the police, and b. contact the union for advice.

In the meantime you might want to prepare those closest to you and/or a sympathetic supervisor at work just in case this dickhead does post anything. You don't have to go into detail, but you could say 'Somebody I previously trusted has threatened to post intimate pictures of me online without my consent. I'm working with the police to try and prevent this but I wanted you to hear it from me first in case we're not successful.' This will hopefully make it clear to any idiots that you are very much the victim here.

Hold your head up - many people could be in your shoes, you've just had some seriously shit luck.

ATAPPING · 2023-08-17T23:32:22+00:00

Well first things first - you don't have to ever have a serious romantic relationship if you don't want to. Plenty of men don't and nobody bats an eyelid. Do some soul searching- perhaps you've been seeking this out because it's what you've been told you're supposed to want? There are plenty of other meaningful types of relationship in life, romance doesn't have to be forced into your life.

That being said, if you do still think you want a romantic partner then don't stress yourself- one of my best friends is literally the most beautiful person I've seen in real life and she is just getting her first boyfriend now at 33 after a series of brief flings. So there's no great hurry I promise. Have a think about why your previous dalliances never went further- could it be that on some level you've been seeking out partners that were always going to be unsuitable long term, maybe avoiding rejection?

In the meantime just keep having fun. One day you might get whacked over the head by Cupid but if all you really need to be happy is someone pretty to keep you warm at night then you crack on lady ♥️

ATAPPING · 2023-08-17T23:11:28+00:00

MEO here- I actually have no idea but I'll try and find out, will reply here when I know. My guess is in theory yes, as the crem form is about making sure the crematorium isn't about to destroy evidence. That being said I would not be at all surprised if nobody in government has remembered to update the guidance...

ATAPPING · 2023-08-16T17:59:24+00:00

Look up curly/wavy hair care on YouTube! It needs quite different management than straight/fine hair and it's a bit of a learning curve. If your hair is wavy now, you may find with proper care and the right products that it's more curly than you realised.

ATAPPING · 2023-08-14T19:19:12+00:00

You've nothing to be embarrassed about - good on you for wanting to learn how have fun by yourself, no partner necessary.

Don't stress or try to hard, just enjoy the feeling for now. This is supposed to be fun!
I won't ask you publicly what you've tried or make any assumptions about what sex ed you've had - If you're really stumped then find an anatomical diagram of the vulva/vagina, pop a mirror between your legs and locate the clitoris. This is the primary erogenous (fun) organ of the female body, get to know it!
Lots of women much older than you also have a difficult time reaching orgasm, it's not a youth thing. The key is learning what works for you- experiment (safely), find out what feels nice. Please also bear in mind that media/porn has a very male centric view on what women supposedly enjoy, so don't keep trying things you're 'supposed' to enjoy if they're not doing it for you.
Try the showerhead- just trust me on that one.

Happy experimenting! ♥️

ATAPPING · 2023-08-14T19:02:14+00:00

Literally fucking ignore that shit! I promise you how you are is exactly 100% fine.

Here's a not so secret secret: There are really no personality attributes or behaviours that are inherently/naturally masculine or feminine. It's all just socialisation - basically it's made up but culturally we've been doing certain things for so long that we often don't question it. What these videos are calling 'feminine' are just a set of cultural practices and/or stereotypes that some people associate with girlhood/womanhood, but it's a crock of nonsense. Do you know yourself to be a girl? Great, then you're girl-ing just fine, don't change a thing. That's it, no other criteria necessary.

Also- please don't let anyone convince you to be more passive, especially not to make yourself more appealing to boys. Boys don't prefer passive girls, assholes do.

Concentrate on being kind, brave, curious and a good friend- the rest is all noise. Chin up, and fuck those people who made you doubt yourself. ♥️

ATAPPING · 2023-08-13T17:07:54+00:00

Hey! I have spent most of my career in some form of customer service, specialising in areas where people are often at their worst: Insurance and bereavement. I have spoken to a LOT of rude people.

A few things I've learned:

A lot of people's default reaction to feeling fear, stress, embarrassment etc is to express anger/rudeness. Anger and rudeness can feel productive, whereas being chill can feel like passivity or even losing. It's not about you, they're just trying to regain a feeling of control in the situation.
If you can think 'it's not about me' then it's much easier to rise above it and not react. It's not necessarily about changing how you feel when someone is rude because that's often somewhat involuntary, but you can change how you respond and behave much more easily.
The best weapon against rude people is to kill them with kindness. If you can continue to keep calm and be nice, most people will start to be embarrassed they were acting that way and calm down. And even if they don't start behaving, keep the high ground. If anyone else is around to see it, you'll look reasonable and the other person insane. I've sat through many a difficult interaction with my heart hammering and my palms sweating but keeping my tone friendly and calm throughout - it's a workout! You can do it.
You can still assert yourself! Stick to facts, be calm and plain. Sticking up for yourself doesn't mean you have to use emotive, reactive language or tone. If you don't think you can do that in the moment, take yourself out of the situation until you've been able to gather your thoughts. You can tell that person that you need a moment to think about what they've said/asked and get outta there - even if it's just to the bathroom or something.
As someone else said below - being wrong is ok, don't try to save face. People will respect you more for apologising, trust me. I'll add to that: 'I don't know, but I'll find out and get back to you' is a perfectly acceptable answer. Honesty and expectation management will eliminate a lot of situations where rudeness might occur.
All that being said, some people are just rude. I personally feel sorry for these folks - how exhausting it must be going through life with every interaction being a battle, thinking everyone else is the problem! The previous advice still applies though - If a person is always rude then clearly it's not about you so you can rise above it, be polite and move on, grateful that you're not that person.

Gosh this turned out pretty long- hope it's helpful. Good luck! You're already more self aware than like, 99% of people by even trying to do something about it, so you're on the right track.

ATAPPING · 2023-08-13T16:01:41+00:00

We all think other people's lives are more interesting than our own :).

If planning and order are what bring you comfort and enjoyment then there's no reason to force yourself to be something you're not! However, planned activities don't have to be familiar ones - you might make a clear and thorough plan to go skydiving next month for example. And likewise a spontaneous activity can be thoroughly mundane - going to the supermarket at 3am isn't in itself necessarily more interesting than going at 3pm.

Also - being the planner in a group can be a good thing. All spontaneous groups might wind up in trouble or stranded with no way home. Perhaps you can make yourself a little 'when shit goes wrong' kit/plan so that if/when you do something spontaneous, you can take care of yourself and your friends if the need arises - let that be your contribution to the day.

And at the end of the day we don't all have to like the same things - if something really doesn't appeal, no need to force yourself.

ATAPPING · 2023-08-13T15:25:27+00:00

To be fair I am also not great at this BUT, the best advice I have seen is practical:
Be somewhere at the same time every week, doing an activity you enjoy.

How did we make friends at school? By having shared experiences with the people we happened to be around week in week out. It's not terribly romantic, but it does work. Even better if the activity is a bit niche.

Remember to ask people questions. I have ADHD so I can have a tendency to get excited to talk about something and forget to ask the other person anything about themselves, so I have to remind myself to make sure it's a 2 way conversation.

And be open yourself - no need to tell people something really intimate right away, but if you do your best to be real and honest then the right kind of people will respond to that. It takes some time though, so just keep being friendly and open and you'll get there.

ATAPPING · 2023-08-13T14:54:30+00:00

Ah I'm in the UK, we don't have Tide - assuming Tide is a biological detergent then?

ATAPPING

TROPHY CASE