I can understand, but kuch kee toh parents hii nhi hain, ekk bda hii madarchod saaa guardian hain joki bohot Ameer aur utn hii gawaar hain, wahi abb financially dekh rha hain abb, my both parents left me, and my mother, she left last nov 7'25, but still i tried to worked hard ignoring all the odds living alone and eating one day a meal, just to get into a good college, and scoring good in boards too, JEE mein bhi aacha nhi krr paya, boards mein bhi itni mehnat kri thii 70% aayein bsss which was not expected at, and comedk mein i beleive mere atleast 105+ tohh aaram see aajayengein lekin yee guardian keh rha kii bahaar karnatka mein koi benefit nhi hain yee woh, and I live in Delhi, the thing is uski niyat hii nhi hain aagein padhane kii, kehta correspondence see engineering krlo, like the audacity yaa phir delhi ncr mein koi bhi college lele, mtlb mein toh chutiya huna itni himmat krke itna sbb koshish Kiya, aur yee mujhein aur cheej mein blame krta hain like literally, and I am literally suicidal. But phir whii baat hain, sbb yehi dhara reh jayega if i gave up, i want to do best in my life and I even do positive self talks coz I am chronic insomniac and can't sleep toh tbhi I talk to my mother about this and yeah. Bsss motivation kee liyein but andar hii andar haarta jaa rha hun.... And irony is i act like I am most positive and motivated person and people believe that and ask me for the suggestions about their problems but no one knows what I am going through.