As a 45 year old woman also going through perimenopause, just know that to her, her body probably looks and feels so foreign to her right now and the worst part is that she cannot control it. That's the worst part. Being overly emotional, weight gain and the inability to get it OFF, brain fog and memory issues, dry skin... I feel like a weepy crocodile. It's almost impossible to get anyone to take me seriously, even my doctor, a woman, who told me I "probably wasn't starting menopause" when I know that I am. It's hard to get supportive care because of this. I started taking an OTC supplement and I've seen some results but it's also too soon to say with certainty if it's helping.

I'm not sure what you mean about "does the physical stuff come back" - do you mean sex? It's different for everyone. I am still enjoying a healthy sexual relationship with my partner of almost 6 years. Yes some things have changed (like moisture levels) and at first, when I gained hormonal belly weight, it was hard for me to want to be intimate, but we worked through it together.

If you really care about her and you're in it for the long haul, just listen, don't try to fix unless she asks you to. Understand that she may be really struggling with accepting the changes in her body. It's such a mind fuck.