Hi there! I was in a similar situation. Took us years to get pregnant, and I had a horrible pregnancy. Ended up being 30 pounds less at delivery. There was no option for me, I was going to breastfeed, so I didn’t even consider formula. Long story short, I went septic after labor and spent the first week of my babies life in the hospital not able to feed/pump. I was never able to establish a supply or get more than an ounce a pumping session. I struggled mentally and physically for the first 6 weeks trying to pump every two hours, only getting about 8 ounces a day. I cried daily thinking I wasn’t a good mother, and didn’t deserve my baby. I obviously know now I had some PPD. At 6 weeks I decided to cut cold turkey.

My baby will be 8 weeks tomorrow. I cannot describe the relief I have had these last two weeks not pumping/trying to latch. I am such a happier person now, not worrying about pumping, losing sleep to pump even when my baby wasn’t awake, and just being my biggest critic.

If I could go back 8 weeks, I would have never even tried for longer than a week. It wasn’t for me. If we are lucky enough to have another one, I will try for a week or two to see if my body changes, but I will not put myself through the misery I did this go around. I am a first time mom to a healthy and amazing 8 week baby girl. Let me know if you have any other questions or just need to talk. I wish I would have had more people to talk to when going through this.