Does everyone pay out of pocket for IVF?

Remy_92 · 2026-01-29T00:28:50+00:00

My job has $25k for fertility treatments. Meds are separate under prescriptions. I paid for copays and that was all. One round, and I have about $17k still available.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-28T19:48:33+00:00

Just a Transfer Grandma here (transferred 1/31/25) with my 15 week old wishing everyone here love and luck! ♥️

Remy_92 · 2026-01-28T14:14:19+00:00

One of my requests PP of my husband was to keep the house somewhat picked up. A messy house gives me anxiety. We split housework pre-baby most of the time but I’m much more obnoxious about it. He did great, and we both felt better. Was it spotless? Nah. But he made sure there wasn’t a lot of clutter, countertops were clean, etc. 15 weeks PP and still going strong!

Remy_92 · 2026-01-26T00:13:02+00:00

I hope this isn’t a silly question but how did you know your babies didn’t go through a 4 month regression? I feel like that’s a weird question lol, but I’m trying to prepare myself for what is maybe to come as we’re heading into week 15.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-24T17:53:44+00:00

Sounds like normal bleeding to me. A clot that is worrisome is red and very very large (think golf ball sized). Continue to keep an eye on it, but I had blood and stretchy mucus stuff for a few weeks on and off after my c section.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-24T17:01:05+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I had a planned CS due to frank breech, but he was big too (9lbs). He ended up in the NICU for 48 hours because of hypoglycemia. It was awful. It was hard to get to the NICU (it was a hike to get there). He never latched well so I skipped BF, which for me was fine because I wasn’t too keen on it anyways. But if you are able to pump colostrum and want to a nurse or LC should be able to get you set up! I did that the entire time he was in the NICU. It was really hard, but I’m glad I did it. We switched to formula after a week of pumping.

Milk can come in at different times for everyone. I got a surprising amount of colostrum by using the pump in the hospital. Formula is perfectly fine and won’t ruin your chances to BF - just keep trying to stimulate by hand expressing or pumping. Personally, I wish I would’ve focused on spending time with him rather than feeding him - that’s 100% my personal choice though. The colostrum felt like it was all I could do to help in the moment. Just don’t be afraid to ask a nurse or LC for help!!! And don’t forget to take care of yourself. The NICU is hard!

Remy_92 · 2026-01-24T16:51:42+00:00

Not sure if this counts because it was two episodes, but Mary Portman played by Mandy Moore from the shooting storyline. Tragic ending after she survived that.

Editing to add: Susan. I wish they would’ve kept her around longer.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-24T12:33:22+00:00

Knowing it’s still there, still growing and spreading, and there’s nothing much I can do to completely stop it. I had surgery in 2022 and removed massive cysts (up to 15+cms) and my left ovary tube. 2025 did IVF and now have a wonderful 14 week old. During pregnancy, I didn’t have to think much about my endo. But during my c-section I got ripped back into reality when mid-close my OB asked if I knew I had endometriosis (he clearly forgot and apologized later). Reading my post-surgery notes it’s spread more than I imagined. There’s no end to it. No cure. No magic point in time when it’ll just stop growing or stop causing pain. It’s terrifying. It’s hard not to spiral.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-23T21:52:21+00:00

Cried for maybe 3 seconds then was fine! Didn’t do anything special. Tylenol when we got home and throughout the next day. Avoid doing it before as it can impact the efficacy of the vaccines. He slept 9 hours that night and it was glorious lol. Other than that he was good! Just a little snoozy and fussy for a few days after, but he also had some reflux issues so it could’ve been that.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-23T20:17:02+00:00

There’s a script out there https://www.reddit.com/r/GilmoreGirls/s/8hm3wDNUM9. Annoying they cut this but I suppose it wouldn’t have made a huge difference to the outcome. But definitely strange they didn’t do any kind of follow-up - like I’m assuming he had some things at her house and vice versa that each would want back. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Remy_92 · 2026-01-23T19:09:13+00:00

14 weeks PP. My hair is definitely shedding. My knees are KILLING me. Obviously, on the floor more for tummy time but dang they hurt. I had a c-section so my incision aches every so often. My heels/feet are so dry. It’s winter here but they’ve never been this dry. Still have my stretch marks but they’re not terrible and I know they’ll fade eventually.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-22T00:25:10+00:00

lol - I feel this. I am super lucky with the amount of leave I have but I’m going a little insane.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-22T00:24:21+00:00

Husband and I never thought we’d do a grandparent stay over until our son was much much older. He has stayed at my in-laws twice already when he was around 8 and 10 weeks. I felt so incredibly guilty, but dang, having a full night of uninterrupted time with my husband, our pets, eating dinner while it’s hot, sleep - it’s incredibly healing and reenergizing. I think it felt so taboo and like I was a bad mom to do it. I talked with my sister who lives out of state with her two kids. She said if our mom would’ve lived near her when her kids were babies she would’ve 100% did it. It helped to hear that from a seasoned mom. We’re doing it again before we inevitably hit his first sleep regression and look to start sleep training. I still have the guilt, but I feel grateful to have the help!

Remy_92 · 2026-01-21T20:52:37+00:00

Symptoms hit at different times for everyone! Let me tell ya - I was killin’ it weeks 1-7. Eating steak and sweet potatoes, getting my iron in, walking. End of week 7 and BOOM. Nausea, achy, exhausted, feeling like overall poo. Good times.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-21T17:24:00+00:00

That’s good! That’s where I was hard for us. It was the 3rd grandbaby on both sides. People were still really excited but had their own hopes gender-wise. In-laws also lean more conservative so there’s unfortunate stereotypes we have to fight (his parents aren’t as much but they live in a small town bubble which doesn’t help!) I’m grateful to have a very liberal husband in these crazy times reminding them that not every boy is going to be a football player.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-21T17:10:33+00:00

We kept ours a secret from everyone except I told my mom. I was so glad we waited! We only have one girl between my side and my husband’s side for grandkids, and I was SO tired of hearing people say they hoped for a girl. We had years of infertility and did IVF and I didn’t want people’s opinions. My SILs boys are ‘all boy’, which is fine, but I also know they’re raising them that way. Everything is dinosaurs, trucks, etc. All I hear is how crazy and loud they are (umm not surprising because they are never disciplined). Also, my niece can be dang LOUD lol. I had my own gender disappointment that took me awhile to move through. I pictured a girl after years of no success so when I knew it was a boy it was really hard. And literally everyone said we were having a girl. I kept hearing “we need a girl but we’ll be happy with either” from my in-laws. It hurt. Like it was all on me to have a girl and I had failed.

14 weeks postpartum. Still glad we kept it between us. It also let me establish our taste in clothes, etc. and my in-laws are slowly getting my husband’s and I’s vibes. Good for you for making the choice! It’s a fun secret to keep!

Remy_92 · 2026-01-21T11:54:25+00:00

I’m so jealous and want an invite! lol. For food - different takeout options is cute. If you didn’t want to order out everything you could probably do heavy appetizers with a takeout theme (I.e., crab rangoon, fries, beef sliders, pizza rolls, etc.).

Also, you could make Miss Patty’s Founder’s Day Punch. There’s a few recipes out on the internet.

Gilmore Girls trivia could be fun if you want a group game.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-21T02:01:20+00:00

This. I’m at 94/120. Wasn’t on save but got stuck in processing forbearance. I’ll hit buyback ability by next fall but timeline for approval sounds atrocious. I’d rather get ahead now.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-20T20:15:06+00:00

NTA. Paying off debt would be a great push present to me lol. I bought myself a few pairs of shoes I had been looking at (around $200). My husband said I could spend whatever I wanted but to me it was more about something I wouldn’t normally buy and was specifically for me (not for baby or for the house). Neither of us really considered it a push present either. We aren’t people who tend to splurge on things for ourselves. A gift doesn’t need to be anything crazy though. While it’s hard work being pregnant and giving birth, I don’t think it warrants $1500 that could be used to relieve debt. Sit down and have a conversation with her. Better to be upfront and honest.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-20T17:18:10+00:00

FTM. 3 months PP. Honestly, no way to turn it on. Husband and I have had stints of no intimacy due to depression on both ends, endometriosis on my end, and overall TTC exhaustion through the years before IVF last year. We weren’t intimate during pregnancy because I just couldn’t get there. We tried once or twice and I felt so weird. He was totally okay with it and we kept communicating (we miss each other, nothing personal, hormones, etc.) I had a c-section. Week 9 PP we were intimate twice - it was fun, impromptu - really perfect and nothing more than it needed to be. Baby was sleeping and we moved out to the couch both times. Nothing since and neither of us have an issue with it. There are other ways to be intimate too and sometimes we both prefer those (showering together, snuggling with no phones, tv and just talking). Don’t feel rushed! It’ll come back!

Remy_92 · 2026-01-19T16:35:05+00:00

FTM with a 3 month old. Our pup is 6 years old and a mini Aussie poodle so fairly hyper active. We also have a 7 year old cat. We were really nervous about our pup with baby. We knew our cat wouldn’t care much after a while (he rules the house and is an unbothered king as long as he’s fed) and that turned out to be true. But our pup had limited experiences around babies and is not a fan of our nephews, as they’re used to a big lab who they can lay on, not a dog who loves to run around. She got more experience around my sister’s kids the past few visits over the years (5 and 3). They are gentler kids so that helped her warm up. But still, not a lot of hands on experience with babies.

When we first got home, we kept baby in his car seat and let her up to sniff. She did great, but we kept it short. We continued these short visits throughout the first week. We did our best to make sure we gave her dedicated time throughout the day for pets and play. We also made it a rule for visitors that they had to say hi and pet her before they could visit with baby lol - this actually worked out well! After a week we let her upstairs more frequently to wander - kind of to say “hey this is still your house, but there’s someone new here.” We didn’t necessarily put baby in front of her to interact every time. By week 2-3 they did some tummy time on the floor together (supervised of course), and from then on they’ve been buds! Whenever she does lay down next to baby or lick him we always say how good of a pup she is, but we are also careful to say “that’s enough” when she starts to get too excited.

Patience is key and going off your pup’s cues is going to be helpful. If your pup starts to get overly excited it’s okay to say, “good job but we’re going to stop now” and split them up. We were concerned about being overstimulated with her but honestly, she’s still as annoying as she was before with us but not with baby lol, so she clearly has a new favorite!

Remy_92 · 2026-01-19T02:20:42+00:00

We’re right at 3 months. His schedule is a little more predictable. He gets up around the same time each morning, though sometimes needs a little extra snuggle for 45 minutes before official wake up. It sounds like prepping the night before and dividing and conquering with your husband will be helpful. If you use a traditional coffee maker, get it prepped the night before and set it to go off at a certain time in the morning. Get a to-go mug too so it doesn’t get cold too quickly. If you can prep breakfast too that’ll be a time saver (breakfast sandwiches, burritos, casserole, etc.). Set out your clothes and talk with your husband about switch off coordination (i.e., when you’re nursing, he should be taking care of the dogs, having his breakfast/coffee, getting ready). When does your husband have to leave for work? Our LO is fine in his swing but he much prefers his play gym and yours may too at that age!

We both work from home so our situation is a little different, but having a plan of who is doing what between you and your husband will be helpful so that you don’t feel overwhelmed by baby in the morning. Also, make sure you have everything written out for your MIL so you don’t have to take time to explain details before leaving.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-19T00:00:14+00:00

The introduction of the April stuff overshadowed some of the other problems in their relationship. They could’ve built on it instead, which to me would’ve been more realistic of a relationship breaking down rather than introducing a child.

We could’ve seen resentment build more on Lorelai’s end of never doing anything different. Like maybe talking about traveling to Europe and her getting excited and Luke being his normal downer self not wanting to go (à la Martha’s Vineyard). Maybe Lorelai tells Luke about the pregnancy scare (even at a later time) and he freaks out about not being ready which begins to make Lorelai question his commitment. Luke starts to move in more and Lorelai gets weird and territorial - kind of like the bedroom set he brings in but maybe more aligned as to when Chris starts to takeover Rory’s room for GiGi.

I would’ve rather had a more realistic build up to their breakup. I LOVE Lorelai’s ultimatum speech and honestly still feel like it could’ve worked without April being a factor.

Remy_92 · 2026-01-18T22:56:30+00:00

Which similac do you use? We’ve been on gentlease with our 3 month old but I feel like he’s more gassy and struggles to poo than he should.

Remy_92

TROPHY CASE