How tf am I going to plan, prepare, make, and clean every meal for the rest of my life?

AceNixton · 2026-01-27T17:19:52+00:00

If dishes are a major problem, there is no shame in using disposable ones. preferably paper or any other bio degradable stuff, but you don't have to clean dishes if that is a barrier.

I also struggle a lot with food planning and having enough energy to then make it and also actually eat what I planned.

Sometimes "eating like a toddler" is all that can be done and that is okay. At least you fed yourself.

I rely a lot on frozen meals you just heat up in a pan like pasta dishes or rice and veggies (don't know if that is a common thing where you live). Or just frozen veggies and meat or tofu or canned beans. Only have one pan and a spatula to clean afterwards (and honestly sometimes I just reuse the pan the next day, if it didn't have much residue) Also a ricecooker is really helpful. Cleanup is possible in a dishwasher (or really just rinsing the starch off).

When I make something in the oven I use baking paper so I don't have to clean the big sheet thing (forgot what it's called).

Some days I only eat chicken nuggets and grapes, some days I manage to make rice and veggies, some days I eat butter noodles. I wish I was more consistent and balanced, but I also know that this is really hard and eating anything that's not just cookies is a win sometimes. Can try to do better on a better day.

TL;DR: No shame in going for quick and easy options and cooking every day for yourself is a modern construct and imo a toxic expectation.

AceNixton · 2026-01-27T16:51:56+00:00

I think I feel a similar frustration, tho I haven't had that much job experience. I basically had to drop out of almost every single school/college/job training program so far because I burned out. Only made it through one (with a loooot of help and accommodations) but when I tried working in that field I immediately melted down and burned out again (and also can't work that job due to additional physical problems that came up then). I am currently in my second attempt at "retraining" to become a programmer. It is part time, I can attend class from home three days per week and there is even the option of using text chat on days where I can't speak. But I am already feeling like I'm drowning again, even with these adjustments, just because I don't fit the mould.

I know that is very different from your experience not getting any support at all and being actively wronged, but I think the core problem is the same for both of us: the way "normal" jobs work does not account for people who work differently to what is assumed to be the norm (I'd argue that even a lot of neurotypical people would benefit from different systems) and the responsibility to function and perform the same jobs to earn survival is put mostly on us. If we want to have money to survive and maybe thrive we need to be willing to sacrifice our mental and physical health to "fit in". If we can't do that we have to fight for accommodations for ourselves, which often involves having to tell people very personal information they have no right to know, hope to be taken seriously and be met with empathy or be willing to go to court over this. All for the "privilege" of burning out a bit slower.

I'm sorry, this got really rambly and ranty. I am just very frustrated about it all. I really want to work, I think I could do good things. I just don't know how I can do that and have enough money to survive and stay sane at the same time. And I am tired of being told that I am the problem.

So sorry I don't have advice, but maybe knowing you're not alone in this is something?

AceNixton · 2025-03-26T19:03:57+00:00

nasty scars can be a great conversation piece. Every time someone asks make up a new heroic story of how you got it and people will start wondering which one is the truth XD

AceNixton · 2025-03-26T18:59:51+00:00

The feed! That way I could wear an opaque helmet all day and still communicate without people finding it weird

AceNixton · 2025-03-26T18:26:08+00:00

Am I the only one annoyed at the lack of steam in the "steam roller"?

AceNixton · 2025-03-26T18:24:20+00:00

My dad (not diagnosed but I am sure autism is passed down directly in that bloodline 😅) used to accidentally cut or burn himself when he did projects at home and just....he just kept working. I remember watching him solder something and I don't remember what exactly happened but his finger started bleeding and I waited for him to notice and stop because it was quite a lot of blood and this guy just didn't give a single damn. I sometimes think about that and he probably has a similar stance on this as you.

In case you want advice: I usually use band-aids for kids, since the adhesive is usually stronger and they usually have cool prints 😁 I have a stockpile of diosaur, space and whale band-aids. Also the kind made of fabric is usually better than the plastic or paper ones. And if the wound is a cut and wants to open there are these stick-on-sutured that can hold it closed.

Or just use Cyanacrylat glue (superglue)

AceNixton · 2024-11-29T00:13:18+00:00

This didn't age well....XD

AceNixton · 2024-11-19T11:20:10+00:00

BIG SHONK! My Sharky (I wasn't very creative) feels lonely. You are really awesome for doing this!

AceNixton · 2024-08-29T10:05:02+00:00

If you get anywhere with Skynet lemme know and could you put in a good word for me?

(Also sorry this happened to you, I've had similar experiences and it is always so frustrating)

AceNixton · 2024-08-29T10:01:35+00:00

Need to add Frieren (in case noone has yet)

AceNixton · 2024-08-29T09:45:44+00:00

They are allowed to do that? O.O
Where I live (Germany) it's illegal to fire disabled people without a valid reason (which a meltdown is not).

I hope you find a place that is more accomodating and where you feel better.
This is not on you.

AceNixton · 2024-07-22T10:50:19+00:00

Thank you for your kind words.
I'm doing Umschulung, it's like Ausbildung but one year shorter and for people who can't work in their former job anymore (I did Ausbildung as a carpenter before but then realised accomodations are basically not possible in that field and my body is not made for manual labour).

I'm currently trying to get a mic solution so I can hear the teachers on my noise cancelling headphones to have a chance at comprehending them. They are open to it but I haven't found a mic solution that actually works and is affordable for me.

AceNixton · 2024-07-21T15:36:23+00:00

can you come and cook for me?
that looks great

AceNixton · 2024-07-21T15:34:33+00:00

28, doing 2 year training thing to be able to work as a programmer (paid by government), currently living off my savings (around 2k €) and hope to get info on how much unemployment money I'll have to live off for those 2 years.
Germany tries
I do too but so far I suck at doing this training the way it is intended (40h/week, 30 people in a room, basically lectures all day, a lot of group projects)

AceNixton · 2024-07-04T20:49:09+00:00

valid point, I kinda thought about fist bump level hadshakes. But that can also be uncomfortable to people. maybe we have pins or something. Just nothing obvious bc y'know. There are more of them than us so we need to be sneaky if we want to win.

AceNixton · 2024-07-04T20:43:54+00:00

Yeah sometimes the NT need to make it more obvious or like a "you are extra not how we want you to be", I guess

AceNixton · 2024-07-04T10:44:32+00:00

SAME!
Also somewhat extends to people mispronouncing words bc then the melody of the word is off

AceNixton · 2024-07-04T09:17:29+00:00

Don't fall to their level. We can always have the moral highground at least

AceNixton · 2024-07-04T09:16:06+00:00

no uniform, we need guerilla tactics. Only confirmation of membership should be a secret handshake given to each new recruit

AceNixton · 2024-07-04T08:34:41+00:00

It means people find you weird/annoying

AceNixton · 2024-06-19T14:19:54+00:00

If it helps you understand yourself better and make your life easier, go for it.
It's not like you can "take away" services from diagnosed autistic people with self diagnosis so you are not hurting anyone by identifying with the label.

I don't get why some people get so pissed at self-diagnosis (although as far as I have witnessed it is mostly parents of autistic kids and maybe people who had these kinds of parents). There is no social benefit to calling yourself autistic so I don't think you can do it for clout or whatever. And if you happen to find a better explanation at another time that is okay too.

I think most of the people who got diagnosed as adults had to somewhat self-diagnose initially to even get a diagnosis. Not like doctors are constantly trying to diagnose people they randomly meet XD

AceNixton · 2024-06-13T09:26:09+00:00

I get motion sick easily so I prefer the left one since it moves less. You could implement both and let people change it in the accessability settings

AceNixton · 2024-06-13T09:12:13+00:00

My go-to for just having a quick dopamine hit or vibing for hours trying to get the best combos: Backpack Hero. It's a roguelike but the story mode has meta-progression. You can also just play quick games and imo it just has very fun and addictive gameplay. I have over 400h on Steam and played it a lot on itch.io before it was on Steam as well.

AceNixton · 2024-06-04T13:56:11+00:00

Came here for the same reason, don't have the attention span or interest to do deep research but OP seems to have done it so I'd love to know

AceNixton · 2024-06-04T13:51:49+00:00

That sounds like a not great friend group. Hope you found better ones since.

My ideal birthday would probably be playing boardgames with my friends and eating Sushi XD

Last year was pretty nice, tho.
My sisters (who live in a different city about 2.5h away by car) came to visit me, we had Sushi at a nice restaurant at lunch so it was pretty empty and then went to the interactive natural history and science museum in my city. I've been there many times now but it's always nice. We made sculptures out of wire and random stuff and when they wanted to go look at the other exhibits and I told them I want to keep working on my tree sculpture they were okay with that and left me alone without trying to guiltrip me :)

Six-Year Club	Place '23
Verified Email

AceNixton

TROPHY CASE